Read Online Keeping Sam by Joanne Phillips - Free Book Online Page B

selection from a cupboard in the therapy room and proceeded to have Kate walk up and down with each of them in turn until she’d found one that felt right. She chose a metal-tipped walking cane that was made, according to Nico, from blackthorn wood. She loved the feel of its curved handle in her palm; loved how it flexed a little as she leaned on it.
    ‘This is the one,’ she said, smiling, and Nico nodded, his expression serious. He gestured for her to sit, and began to scribble notes onto a fresh page in her file.
    ‘It goes on computer later,’ he explained, nodding towards an ancient-looking computer screen collecting dust in the corner. ‘We’re not behind the times,’ he added with just a touch of defensiveness. Kate couldn’t care less. She stroked her cane and wondered whether she’d be allowed to keep it once she was fully recovered.
    ‘So, Kate Steiner,’ Nico said with a smile, ‘tell me how you are settling in down here.’
    She gave a tiny shrug, unsure how to answer. ‘The house social services found for me is really nice. I mean, the lady who owns it is nice.’
    ‘And your son?’ Nico asked, his gaze unwavering. ‘Have you seen him? It’s all in your file,’ he added when Kate blanched. ‘I don’t mean to pry. Your therapist in Manchester, he wrote it all down.’
    ‘Sure.’ Kate swallowed over a lump in her throat. ‘I’ve seen my son. And he’ll be coming to live with me very soon.’
    ‘Good.’ Nico smiled. ‘Are there any other symptoms you’ve noticed since being discharged? Physical or otherwise – you must let your GP know if you notice anything untoward.’
    There was something, but Kate was loath to bring it up. Besides, Nico was her physical therapist, not her doctor, as he himself had just pointed out. She hesitated, but then decided to mention it anyway. He’d probably tell her it was nothing, and then she could just forget about it.
    ‘I get nightmares,’ she confessed. ‘I mean, really bad ones. I don’t like to sleep much anyway – I lost so much time to sleep, it doesn’t feel right to just lie down and close my eyes. I suppose that sounds stupid to you.’
    Nico said nothing. Kate sighed, then carried on.
    ‘So, when I do let myself fall asleep I just have these awful nightmares. I think they … I think they’re about the attack. At least, that’s all I can come up with to explain them.’
    Nico glanced at her file again. ‘You were hit on the head by an intruder.’ He made it sound oddly mundane. Kate nodded, not trusting herself to speak for fear she might start crying. It was being in a hospital environment again, she told herself. It brought up all the feelings of insecurity and helplessness she thought she’d left behind in Manchester.
    ‘Do you see your attacker in your nightmares?’ Nico asked, leaning forward and propping his elbows on his knees. Like all physiotherapists Kate had ever met, he wore tracksuit bottoms and a T-shirt, making him look younger than perhaps he was, like a grown-up boy playing sports at school.
    She shook her head. ‘No face. Just this sense of someone behind me. It’s daytime, and I’m in my kitchen. It’s not the exact same kitchen, you understand, but it is where I live. Where I lived, I mean. And there’s someone in the room with me. I can’t hear him, but I can sense him. Just standing there. And I’m too afraid to turn around. In my dream, my legs are weak and my body is useless, just how it was when I first woke up from the coma. And Sam is there. Sam is sitting in his playpen, chattering away, gurgling and laughing and chewing on his plastic train, and all the time I’m just staring at him, unable to move a muscle. So scared. Just so afraid that something is going to happen to him, and if I just stay very still he might be okay.’ The tears came now, just as Kate had known they would, but there was nothing she could do about it. She wiped her face on her sleeve, just one quick swipe, hoping Nico