It
looks like there was a fire in the living room. The furniture is all
still in its place but there is blood on the walls.
I sit on the couch taking it all in.
Words in blood come into focus:
For you my love. I did it for you.
Something moves in the shadows outside.
“Gabriel?” I see the outline of him in the distance.
Seeing him lifts a pain from deep within me blanketing my being. I
didn’t realize the pain was there. Having him within my reach
makes me feel like I’m suffocating from the distance between
us.
“Gabriel, I’m here,” I
shout, walking to climb through the broken window to go to him. I
can’t raise my feet to the ledge; something unseen is holding
them down. The door! I run around the couch to the door, but the knob
won’t turn. I pull on it, looking around the burnt out room for
something to smash the knob off. There’s nothing.
Gabriel’s voice is haunting. “I
need you.” He calls to me over and over. The sound saturates
all of my senses, creating an angered confusion that I can’t
control. My hands are balled into fists and my nails bite into my
palms with enough intensity to draw blood.
Thick dripping lines move along the wall
forming the words: “You have the power to leave.” They
disappear once I’ve read them.
The message prompts me to try the knob
again, but my hands are slick with the blood I’ve released into
my palms. I kick at the door, trying to break it down, but I’m
not strong enough. I try the window again, but my body is impotent to
climb through, and it’s like my shoes are filled with gravel.
Something is watching and won’t let me leave. In frustration I
smash the rest of the glass out of the window frames, cutting my
arms. I scream out in pain and frustration, “Why can’t I
leave?”
Lines appear on the wall moving slowly
through soot and crumbling drywall, “Outside the door.”
The words fade.
“Outside the door? What the hell
is that supposed to mean? I want to be outside the door.” I go
to the window and crane my neck to see the welcome mat. Carl is
standing there in his customary guard stance with his hands folded in
front of him. “Carl!” I call out to him but he doesn’t
respond. I call again, but nothing. He can’t hear me or he is
ignoring me.
“Fuck, he’s keeping me in
here.” Gabriel’s form is fading into the fog, but I can
still hear him calling out.
“Come to me.” His voice is
far away, but the anguish in his tone shoots through me, causing me
to double over in pain.
“Use the power within you.”
The words are scratching into the drywall, causing more of the wet
burnt surface to crumble to the floor.
There is no power in me. I can’t
do anything. My body folds to the floor in a pool of hopelessness
that I’m filling with tears that won’t stop falling.
“Reach out to him; I’ll help
you.” The meaning is unclear to me.
A surge of power courses through me and
I’m lifted effortlessly off the floor to my feet. I go to the
window where I can see Carl. I reach my hands toward him. As I do,
dark tendrils of smoke make their way toward him. I’m
astonished at what I’m doing but the power flowing through me
is overwhelming. I’ve never felt so strong. As my black smoky
hands near Carl I feel like I can do anything. I put the hands on his
shoulder blades and push. He looks at me and shakes his head, he’s
unmovable.
“Let me out!” I gravel out
in a voice that isn’t my own.
Carl plants his feet firmly on the mat
and shakes his head. His eyes challenge me, but I know I’m
stronger than him. My eyes fill with the hatred burning in me for
anything and everything that is keeping me from Gabriel. He holds my
gaze, unyielding. He’s raised the ante and I’m going to
see him – dead.
Guiding my hands to his neck I command
them to wrap around his throat and squeeze. His eyes round out in
shock as he tears at the hands strangling him. He’s helpless;
he can do nothing to stop me. I will get out of this
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