Read Online In Darkness Lost by Ariel Paiement - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Ariel Paiement
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just… I didn’t want to talk about it.”
“Well, do you want to talk about it now?” She wrapped her arms around my neck, and leaned back a bit to look me in the eyes.
“No, but I will if you want. Just keep your voice down.” I muttered.
She raised an eyebrow. “Is this going to irritate me?”
“Probably.” I kept my arms around her waist, smiling slightly at her look.
“Well, dump it all now, then. Because at the moment, I’m in a good mood, and I won’t be as angry.” She laughed.
I laughed too. She always seemed to make me laugh when I didn’t feel like it. “Fine. The thing is this: I don’t like that you insist on coming to these places. Why can’t you send a messenger to do all this? They’d do it just as well, Dairdra, and I can’t protect you here like I can in the palace.” My expression turned somber as I pleaded with her to understand where I was coming from.
She ran her fingers down my face before resting her hand against my chest. She looked at her splayed out fingers. Then she looked back at me, taking a deep breath. “Crypt, we’ve been through this before. A messenger can’t breathe hope into these men like the true leader can. They fight better because they’ve seen me, and they know that their lives aren’t just being thrown away for a useless cause. They need to see that I care about them and am doing everything I can instead of cowering behind locked doors and walls while leaving them to fight my battles.”
I sighed. “I know. I just hate that I can’t protect you. It makes me feel so helpless.” I whispered.
“I appreciate that you want to protect me, Crypt – really, I do – but you have to realize that you can’t always be there for me.” She whispered back.
I rested my forehead against hers. “I know. As Court Mage, however, part of my job in wartime is to protect whichever royal is on the throne at the time. That’s you, and you’re making my job extremely difficult.”
“I know that.” She fiddled with the buttons on her shirt. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean… Crypt, I’m not trying to make it hard for you.”
She released me, backing away. I could tell I’d upset her. My heart seemed to burst with tears. The last thing she needed was for her protector to become difficult. I should have been supporting her in whatever she decided instead of fighting her over it. But it was her safety, and I knew compromising on that wasn’t an option.
“Dairdra, please. At least… I don’t know. Maybe you could just stop walking the walls without me. I have to be there to protect you from anything that those men down there might throw at you. If you are killed, we’ll all lose. The soldiers would give up, and you know it.”
“They would never give up, Crypt. They would keep fighting for family and home.”
I shook my head. “I think they’d decide that without a ruler, it would be better to welcome in the enemy, who is stable and capable of keeping Argent from going down the drain.”
“Never! They are too independent to just roll over because I die.”
“That doesn’t matter. Take measures that will keep you safe, Dairdra. Let me go with you whenever you go into a potentially dangerous situation.”
“Fine.” She walked back over to me, putting her arms back around my neck. “I’ll let you come with me whenever I go into a dangerous situation. I’ll also let you know when I go places and where I’m going.”
“Thank you.” I whispered, the fear and worry gnawing at my stomach loosening their hold a bit when she agreed to my plea.
She kissed me gently.
I only kissed her back a moment before pushing away from her. “Dairdra, this place has windows, and there’s no guarantee that there’s no one watching. You shouldn’t do that here.” I whispered.
“Who cares if they know that I love you? We’ll be married eventually anyway. It’s expected.”
I stared at her blankly.
“I explained this, Crypt! Our family
“Well, do you want to talk about it now?” She wrapped her arms around my neck, and leaned back a bit to look me in the eyes.
“No, but I will if you want. Just keep your voice down.” I muttered.
She raised an eyebrow. “Is this going to irritate me?”
“Probably.” I kept my arms around her waist, smiling slightly at her look.
“Well, dump it all now, then. Because at the moment, I’m in a good mood, and I won’t be as angry.” She laughed.
I laughed too. She always seemed to make me laugh when I didn’t feel like it. “Fine. The thing is this: I don’t like that you insist on coming to these places. Why can’t you send a messenger to do all this? They’d do it just as well, Dairdra, and I can’t protect you here like I can in the palace.” My expression turned somber as I pleaded with her to understand where I was coming from.
She ran her fingers down my face before resting her hand against my chest. She looked at her splayed out fingers. Then she looked back at me, taking a deep breath. “Crypt, we’ve been through this before. A messenger can’t breathe hope into these men like the true leader can. They fight better because they’ve seen me, and they know that their lives aren’t just being thrown away for a useless cause. They need to see that I care about them and am doing everything I can instead of cowering behind locked doors and walls while leaving them to fight my battles.”
I sighed. “I know. I just hate that I can’t protect you. It makes me feel so helpless.” I whispered.
“I appreciate that you want to protect me, Crypt – really, I do – but you have to realize that you can’t always be there for me.” She whispered back.
I rested my forehead against hers. “I know. As Court Mage, however, part of my job in wartime is to protect whichever royal is on the throne at the time. That’s you, and you’re making my job extremely difficult.”
“I know that.” She fiddled with the buttons on her shirt. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean… Crypt, I’m not trying to make it hard for you.”
She released me, backing away. I could tell I’d upset her. My heart seemed to burst with tears. The last thing she needed was for her protector to become difficult. I should have been supporting her in whatever she decided instead of fighting her over it. But it was her safety, and I knew compromising on that wasn’t an option.
“Dairdra, please. At least… I don’t know. Maybe you could just stop walking the walls without me. I have to be there to protect you from anything that those men down there might throw at you. If you are killed, we’ll all lose. The soldiers would give up, and you know it.”
“They would never give up, Crypt. They would keep fighting for family and home.”
I shook my head. “I think they’d decide that without a ruler, it would be better to welcome in the enemy, who is stable and capable of keeping Argent from going down the drain.”
“Never! They are too independent to just roll over because I die.”
“That doesn’t matter. Take measures that will keep you safe, Dairdra. Let me go with you whenever you go into a potentially dangerous situation.”
“Fine.” She walked back over to me, putting her arms back around my neck. “I’ll let you come with me whenever I go into a dangerous situation. I’ll also let you know when I go places and where I’m going.”
“Thank you.” I whispered, the fear and worry gnawing at my stomach loosening their hold a bit when she agreed to my plea.
She kissed me gently.
I only kissed her back a moment before pushing away from her. “Dairdra, this place has windows, and there’s no guarantee that there’s no one watching. You shouldn’t do that here.” I whispered.
“Who cares if they know that I love you? We’ll be married eventually anyway. It’s expected.”
I stared at her blankly.
“I explained this, Crypt! Our family
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