Human Interaction

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Authors: Cheyenne Meadows
Tags: paranormal crime comdey erotic romance
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his walker, complete with tennis balls on the front feet, closer at a slow, but steady pace.
    "Oh, good grief." I shook my head. "Ummm. No thanks."
    Meat covered a chuckle with a loud cough, his upper chest shook from the effort to contain his amusement. Ducky watched the man with a look of incredulous derision.
    Not the least bit deterred, the elderly geezer paused long enough to unzip his pants and let them fall to his ankles. "Whatcha think of this?" His voice croaked with pride.
    I choked. Ducky swore and mumbled something about eating the man to put us out of our misery. Meat lost control and cracked up.
    This was so wrong. No matter how many therapy sessions, the little wrinkled up old man with his wrinkled up penis would haunt me. Covering my eyes, I prayed the exhibitionist would take the hint and leave. Peeking through my fingers, I found that not to be the case, unfortunately. He just stared at us, grinned wide enough to show off his three remaining teeth, and reached down to fondle himself.
    Ducky spun around, glaring down at me. Meat managed to tear his gaze from the sexual performance in front of us to address me. "You never fail to entertain."
    Blushing furiously, I looked anywhere but at the old man participating in his version of self-love. "Do you think we can maybe leave before"—I glanced back to the man—"the culmination of the deed?"
    At this point, teleportation ranked as the safest and fastest escape maneuver. Even if the guy told all his other nursing home friends we were there and then we vanished, I'm not sure anyone would believe him. The staff would probably chalk it down to dementia. His friends were probably also slightly confused and saw similar things weekly.
    I grabbed both men and focused once more. "I swear if you don't get it right this time…" Ducky's voice trailed off as we vanished once more.
    Tires squealed and horns blared.
    "Shit!" Meat jumped, dragging us along.
    Ducky growled. "Live through that near death adventure only to be hit by a car on the return trip. I swear she's jinxed."
    We stood on the sidewalk, thanks to Meat's quick reflexes. They both glowered down at me.
    "Hey! I got you back, didn't I?" I turned and pointed. "Right outside the Clearwater City Library, no less." My chin went up with pride. I had hit the target. Well, scratch that. Home had been the target. The club a secondary option. But, hey. Beggars can't be choosers. Solid landing and still dark outside, I chalked this leap as a home run. What they didn't know wouldn't hurt them. In all honesty, the library never entered my mind, but no way would I spill such a confession to the two doubting peters beside me. Let them think I stood as the next best thing to Wonder Woman.
    "You landed us in the middle of the damn intersection, you idiot!" Meat grumbled.
    A torrent of rain dumped out of the sky, drenched us in seconds, while a strong gust nearly blew me off my feet.
    "In the middle of a thunderstorm, no less," Ducky added, watching the panicked drivers zip here and there, heading toward destinations of safety.
    Okay. Maybe not protégé to Wonder Woman. But surely I still held high enough esteem level with Miss Piggy in their eyes. "Yeah, well…" What does one say to that? I settled for sticking my tongue out at them.
    Another gale hit and Meat jerked us through the doors of the nearly empty library, growling and griping the whole time. We were all soaked, clothes clung to our skins as we dripped water on the entryway of the establishment.
    "I can teleport," Ducky mimicked in a high pitched taunt.
    I glared in his direction. He simply snorted.
    Crossing my arms I pouted. "At least I got us to safety."
    Meat shook his head. "That's debatable."
    Yeah, well. They weren't perfect either. Monsoon-ridden Clearwater City had to top an ocean full of hungry sharks.
    "I guess I should call the police and let them know about the local kidnappers."
    "Don't bother. I'll take care of it."
    I looked from Ducky to him.

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