Read Online How Spy I Am by Diane Henders - Free Book Online Page A

wants to see a
woman my age in a porn movie.”
    “You underestimate
yourself,” he replied.
    Before I could decide
whether that was complimentary or insulting, he continued, “In
fact, you already have a dedicated following on the internet. Or, I
should say, Arlene Cherry has a dedicated following.”
    “Oh, please,” I
begged, ignoring Hellhound’s quaking bulk beside me. “Cherry?
Seriously? At my age?”
    A snicker burst out of
Hellhound.
    Stemp shrugged. “I
didn’t make up the name. Lawrence Harchman did.”
    Revolting
comprehension filled me. “The red cherry-scented leather. Arlene Cherry . I’m going to hunt down that slime-sucking little
shitweasel and twist his tiny, pathetic dick into a pretzel-”
    Stemp interrupted,
“That’s an excellent idea. Minus the assault, of course. It would
be very helpful in establishing your cover…”
    “Fuck that!” I
rocketed to my feet. “Fuck him…”
    “You already did
that,” Stemp said, and this time there was no mistaking the evil
gleam in his eye. “In fact, you did it in some extremely varied and
creative ways. I was impressed.”
    “I didn’t !” My
face was hot enough to melt every snowflake inside a two-mile
radius. “You know those videos were fake, he’s such a little
slimeball…”
    “Red cherry-scented
leather?” Hellhound broke in. “Hey, darlin’, ya been holdin’ out on
me. When do I get to see it?”
    “I don’t own any,” I
snapped. “Harchman is a disgusting little zit on the ass-end of the
world-”
    “Nevertheless,” Stemp
interrupted. Apparently tired of tormenting me, he addressed us in
matter-of-fact tones. “The official story for Ms. Kelly’s friends
and acquaintances is that Ms. Kelly drove down to Calgary to visit
you, Helmand, and while she was there she received a message that
her aunt had been taken ill in Victoria. Ms. Kelly rushed to the
airport and flew to Victoria, where she remained for several days,
unaware that her car had been stolen and involved in a fatality
accident. By the time she returned to Calgary and discovered the
case of mistaken identity, her funeral was already over.”
    He nodded to me. “Ms.
Kelly, I’m sure you’ll enjoy many happy reunions as a result. In
the process of those reunions, you will ask your friends to keep
the news of your survival inside their immediate group, because
while in Victoria, you were mistaken by the media for an internet
porn star. Understandably, you don’t wish to attract further
attention.”
    “Can’t we come up with
something else instead?” I pleaded. “Can’t we say I’m being
threatened by my ex-husband and I have to lie low or
something?”
    “No,” Stemp said.
“That would be too easy to disprove, and it would raise questions
as to why you don’t involve the police. Besides, the wheels are
already in motion. Even as we speak, the news media is seizing upon
a story about Arlene Cherry, an internet star with a sizeable
underground following of middle-aged men who…” he cleared his
throat. “…enjoy voyeuristic amateur porn.”
    “Ms. Cherry…” Stemp
inclined his head in my direction. “…is known to the police as a
small-time con artist whose real name is Arlene Widdenback. She has
a few minor convictions and has been incarcerated on three separate
occasions for fraud.”
    I tried to close my
ears to the spluttering sounds of mirth emanating from Hellhound’s
direction while Stemp continued, “The media will report that Ms.
Cherry, or rather, Ms. Widdenback, has recently been identified
living in the small town of Silverside, Alberta, using the identity
of one Aydan Kelly.”
    I knotted both hands
in my hair and sank back down onto the sofa in despair. Stemp
raised his voice slightly to talk over my groan.
    “The real Aydan Kelly,
of course, is recently dead, and all official records will indicate
that. Ms. Kelly, your assets are now being held in a numbered
company, and you will still have full access to them through