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Authors: Elizabeth Rolls
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body to join in the treacherous assault shocked her. What sort of wanton creature ached and trembled at the mere memory of a kiss that had lasted about three seconds?
It would have to last a lifetime. She didn’t dare see him again. Grimly she admitted that it was not that she did not trust him. Rather, she could not trust herself. Her whole being cried out to let him hold her, touch her.
Stop it! He wants a great deal more than just to hold you. He wants exactly what Godfrey wants. Nothing else. A gentle, persuasive voice murmured, Would it be so bad to be his mistress? He would be kind to you…you’d be free. You could purchase an annuity. They’d never dare to take you back after that…even if you are a minor.
No! She wouldn’t, she couldn’t. She mustn’t. Things weren’t so bad that she needed to sell herself into whoredom. Besides, perhaps he didn’t want her as his mistress. Chances were she had completely misunderstood him and that he simply wanted to bed her while he was here. That was much more likely. Even if he did want more…She shied away from the thought, shocked at her own weakness.
A little voice asked, How much longer can you hold Godfrey off? Wouldn’t it be better—
No! If only she could think of some way to leave when she came of age. Just over a year. She shut her eyes in despair at the bitter reality. She had nothing—no money, no other connections. She would be no safer if she did leave.
A soft tap on the door shocked her bolt upright. Who would bother knocking? Certainly not Godfrey…
‘Selina? Are you awake?’ The deep voice went straight through her like a spear. What could he possibly want?
Exactly what he wanted this afternoon.
‘Y…yes.’
‘May I come in?’
How can I stop you?
‘By saying no ,’ came the quiet response. Dismayed, she realised that she had spoken aloud. And that even if she let him in, she was safe enough. He had knocked, requesting her permission to enter. He has a gentle way with women and children…
‘Come in.’ She felt as though those two simple words had brought her to the edge of a precipice, to hang trembling over the unknown.
Clutching her blanket to her, she watched, wary, as the door opened and he came in. His lamp cast a mellow flickering glow so that she saw his face shadowed, as she had remembered it for five long years. In that light she could almost forget that he was Blakehurst. She could almost pretend that this was one of her dreams in which, miraculously, Max had come to take her away. Almost.
He dwarfed her tiny room, needing to bend his head to avoid cracking his six foot plus height on a beam. ‘May I sit down?’
‘If you can find something to sit on,’ she said, deliberately unwelcoming. To her complete consternation he sat on the campaign chest. He appeared to be holding himself stiffly. She wondered if he were uncomfortable. Then she saw the flash of his eyes in the lamplight and had the impression of something held tightly leashed, something dangerously hot.
‘I imagine you know why I have come,’ he said in a quiet voice strangely at odds with the burning look in his eyes.
Burning? She gave herself a mental shake. She must be imagining things. It was just the reflected lamplight.
‘I came to make quite sure you understood what I offered you this morning. I want more than a casual tumble. I would take you as my mistress, Selina. If you still refuse, then so be it, but I thought you might find my protection more acceptable than Faringdon’s persecution.’
A gentle way with women… ‘Why?’
She thought he blinked. ‘Why? Because I’m asking you, Selina. Not forcing you. If you become my mistress, it must be willingly.’
‘No. I meant, why do you want me as your mistress?’ And why am I even asking?
He definitely blinked. ‘Isn’t that obvious, Selina?’
‘No.’ She couldn’t imagine why he would want her. According to her aunt and cousins she had nothing to recommend her. Oh, she
It would have to last a lifetime. She didn’t dare see him again. Grimly she admitted that it was not that she did not trust him. Rather, she could not trust herself. Her whole being cried out to let him hold her, touch her.
Stop it! He wants a great deal more than just to hold you. He wants exactly what Godfrey wants. Nothing else. A gentle, persuasive voice murmured, Would it be so bad to be his mistress? He would be kind to you…you’d be free. You could purchase an annuity. They’d never dare to take you back after that…even if you are a minor.
No! She wouldn’t, she couldn’t. She mustn’t. Things weren’t so bad that she needed to sell herself into whoredom. Besides, perhaps he didn’t want her as his mistress. Chances were she had completely misunderstood him and that he simply wanted to bed her while he was here. That was much more likely. Even if he did want more…She shied away from the thought, shocked at her own weakness.
A little voice asked, How much longer can you hold Godfrey off? Wouldn’t it be better—
No! If only she could think of some way to leave when she came of age. Just over a year. She shut her eyes in despair at the bitter reality. She had nothing—no money, no other connections. She would be no safer if she did leave.
A soft tap on the door shocked her bolt upright. Who would bother knocking? Certainly not Godfrey…
‘Selina? Are you awake?’ The deep voice went straight through her like a spear. What could he possibly want?
Exactly what he wanted this afternoon.
‘Y…yes.’
‘May I come in?’
How can I stop you?
‘By saying no ,’ came the quiet response. Dismayed, she realised that she had spoken aloud. And that even if she let him in, she was safe enough. He had knocked, requesting her permission to enter. He has a gentle way with women and children…
‘Come in.’ She felt as though those two simple words had brought her to the edge of a precipice, to hang trembling over the unknown.
Clutching her blanket to her, she watched, wary, as the door opened and he came in. His lamp cast a mellow flickering glow so that she saw his face shadowed, as she had remembered it for five long years. In that light she could almost forget that he was Blakehurst. She could almost pretend that this was one of her dreams in which, miraculously, Max had come to take her away. Almost.
He dwarfed her tiny room, needing to bend his head to avoid cracking his six foot plus height on a beam. ‘May I sit down?’
‘If you can find something to sit on,’ she said, deliberately unwelcoming. To her complete consternation he sat on the campaign chest. He appeared to be holding himself stiffly. She wondered if he were uncomfortable. Then she saw the flash of his eyes in the lamplight and had the impression of something held tightly leashed, something dangerously hot.
‘I imagine you know why I have come,’ he said in a quiet voice strangely at odds with the burning look in his eyes.
Burning? She gave herself a mental shake. She must be imagining things. It was just the reflected lamplight.
‘I came to make quite sure you understood what I offered you this morning. I want more than a casual tumble. I would take you as my mistress, Selina. If you still refuse, then so be it, but I thought you might find my protection more acceptable than Faringdon’s persecution.’
A gentle way with women… ‘Why?’
She thought he blinked. ‘Why? Because I’m asking you, Selina. Not forcing you. If you become my mistress, it must be willingly.’
‘No. I meant, why do you want me as your mistress?’ And why am I even asking?
He definitely blinked. ‘Isn’t that obvious, Selina?’
‘No.’ She couldn’t imagine why he would want her. According to her aunt and cousins she had nothing to recommend her. Oh, she
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