Read Online His Holiday Heart by Jillian Hart - Free Book Online Page B

She’s never going to forgive me.”
    He squeezed his eyes shut, unable to stand the look on her honest face. She didn’t deserve what he had done. He turned off his heart so he wouldn’t feel agony and remorse slam into him like a speeding semi. The drip of blood into the sink killed him.
    What was it about Lucy? he asked angrily as he spun around and grabbed a few paper towels off the roll. She was contrary to everything he knew. She was a law unto herself.
    “I—I need to buy her another plate,” she sputtered, holding her chin very still and blinking fast. The tears in her eyes were because he had put them there. The fixation on the plate was to cover whatever damage he had really caused.
    What damage could Lucy have? He always figured she was one of those perfect types that nothing bad ever happened to. Otherwise, why could she be so sunny? Why could she write fairy tales about love and romance that always ended with a happy marriage? She didn’t exactly have her feet planted on the ground.
    He took her hand in his—it was small and soft compared to his—and took a look at the cut. The cut was not deep, not serious, and it didn’t look like there were any shards in the wound. He wrapped the towels around her palm and applied gentle pressure. “I’m the one who owes Katherine a new plate.”
    “But I dropped it.” She focused stubbornly on the sink, turning her face away from him just enough to let him know she couldn’t stand that he was so close to her.
    He kept a tight hold of her hand so she couldn’t pull it away. “I shouldn’t have said what I did. I apologize.”
    “All right.” Her chin lifted a notch higher. “I’ll take care of this, thank you.”
    She meant her hand. That was killing him, too. This tactic had worked with every other woman who had crossed paths with him, and they all had cooperated nicely with his plan.
    But not Lucy. Never Lucy. He should have known. A sigh of resignation escaped him as he lifted the towels from her skin. Most of the bleeding had stopped. It wasn’t very much, but he hated the thought of what he’d done. He hated that he really hurt her.
    “I’ll get a bandage,” he choked out. “Don’t move.”
    He tossed the towels into the kitchen garbage and looked in the cabinet next to the stove. The first aid supplies were neatly organized. He loved Katherine and her organization. He took a bandage out of the box and a tube of antibiotic ointment.
    A few more steps brought him back to Lucy, standing as still as the china plate and looking like she was in as many pieces. He hated that. Maybe her breakup with her fiancé had been fairly recent.
    “I’m sorry, Lucy.” He spun the top off the tube and took her hand in his. It felt cold, when a moment ago her skin had been warmed silk. “I wish I could take back what I said.”
    “You already apologized.”
    “I know.” He didn’t know how to begin to explain it. He had always been unlovable. It wasn’t because he’d had a bad mother. She wasn’t to blame for who he was essentially. He tried to be a good man, a good Christian and a hard worker for his family. None of that was Lucy’s fault. Judging by the heartbreak on her face, she had enough pain of her own. He squeezed a few drops of cream onto the cut. “This won’t keep you from your work, will it?”
    “Probably. I may have to sue.”
    He detected a slight curve in the corners of her mouth—and what was wrong with him that he was still looking there? She was one woman he was never going to kiss. Let’s face it. Neither of them would ever want that. He tore at the wrapping and peeled the backing off the adhesive. “Call the bookstore if you need the name of our lawyer.”
    “I might.” Those tears still hovered in her eyes.
    Deep down as far as his soul went, he wanted to make those tears go away. “There. You don’t want to get that wet. I’ll finish the dishes.”
    “No, I’ll just use my other hand.” She glared at him