Read Online Head Start (Cedar Tree #7) by Freya Barker - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Freya Barker
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leaning back to look at me in surprise. It almost makes me laugh.
“You forget this is my work. Spending years overseas in the military helped. I have seen and still see enough human aberration and cruelty to last me a few lifetimes.” I know I’ve let too much of myself show when she looks at me strangely. Her hand comes up to rest in the middle of my chest.
“What happened to you?” she asks softly.
I can’t answer that. I wish I could. “Life, Pup. Life happened.” It’s the best I can do.
She slightly tilts her head when she asks, “How old are you exactly?”
I instantly release her and step away. Fucking seriously? We’re back here again? My frustration must be visible because she reaches to stop me with her hand on my arm.
“Why the fuck does a bloody number matter so much to you? Every time I think we’re getting somewhere, you throw my age in my face, like it’s some kind of blemish. What the fuck am I supposed to do about that, huh? The one thing I can’t change.”
I pull my arm from her grip, turn around and walk right out of there. This whole screwed-up situation is too high octane for my blood right now and I need to cool off. But I don’t get very far.
“Wait!” Kendra comes running out of the house after me just as I’m getting into my truck. “Please, don’t go. I...I didn’t mean anything by it. Can I please explain?”
Goddammit. She’s hanging on to my door, her face pale and biting her bottom lip with a vengeance. I reach out and pull her lip free with my thumb. “Don’t do that,” I tell her softly, already regretting my outburst. I know people are lulled into thinking I’m a laid back guy—I work hard at it—but when it comes to things that are important to me, I can have an explosive temper. Yet another piece of myself I’d rather keep from her. I’m fucking up.
“Please come inside.” Her voice is soft, pleading, and it pulls at me.
I drop my head and hit it on the steering wheel a few times before sliding back out of the truck and following her inside.
K endra
I’m so relieved when I hear his footsteps behind me. I hadn’t expected that kind of reaction to the question that simply popped out. Listening to him, realizing there was so much more to him than the person I’d made him out to be, had prompted me to ask about his age. The moment I hear the door close, I swing around to face him.
I watch him linger just inside the door and take a few steps closer. “You surprised me, just now. I know it’s my own fault, never wanting to look beyond the surface. I’ve been too hung up on my own...issues to look any closer.” I shake my head to clear it, hoping to find the words to explain. “There’s more to you than I’ve given you credit for. Oh,” I add quickly, seeing the clench of his jaw. “I think I’ve always known, which is a big reason why it seemed safer not to look too deep.”
He’s been quietly watching me struggle through my words, and I’m not sure I’m making any sense, but something must have stirred him, because he takes a step toward me.
“I’ve purposely kept you at a distance. Because of our age difference, I let the red flag fly high. Honestly? I think it’s the only thing that I can make into enough of a reason to push you away.” At my words, Neil moves in even closer, only a step away. The look on his face is intense, but no longer angry, and I decide to open up a little more. Before I have a chance to open my mouth, he beats me to it.
“I’ll be thirty-two next month.”
Eight years. Not as bad as the twelve years I thought separated us. Still, eight years.
“I’m forty,” I tell him stupidly.
“I know, and I don’t give a flying fuck,” he says fiercely before adding, “and neither should you.”
“You don’t understand,” I try to explain. “I...my mother...she...” Neil closes the distance between us and cups my face in his hands.
“I. Don’t. Care.”
I don’t have a chance to say
“You forget this is my work. Spending years overseas in the military helped. I have seen and still see enough human aberration and cruelty to last me a few lifetimes.” I know I’ve let too much of myself show when she looks at me strangely. Her hand comes up to rest in the middle of my chest.
“What happened to you?” she asks softly.
I can’t answer that. I wish I could. “Life, Pup. Life happened.” It’s the best I can do.
She slightly tilts her head when she asks, “How old are you exactly?”
I instantly release her and step away. Fucking seriously? We’re back here again? My frustration must be visible because she reaches to stop me with her hand on my arm.
“Why the fuck does a bloody number matter so much to you? Every time I think we’re getting somewhere, you throw my age in my face, like it’s some kind of blemish. What the fuck am I supposed to do about that, huh? The one thing I can’t change.”
I pull my arm from her grip, turn around and walk right out of there. This whole screwed-up situation is too high octane for my blood right now and I need to cool off. But I don’t get very far.
“Wait!” Kendra comes running out of the house after me just as I’m getting into my truck. “Please, don’t go. I...I didn’t mean anything by it. Can I please explain?”
Goddammit. She’s hanging on to my door, her face pale and biting her bottom lip with a vengeance. I reach out and pull her lip free with my thumb. “Don’t do that,” I tell her softly, already regretting my outburst. I know people are lulled into thinking I’m a laid back guy—I work hard at it—but when it comes to things that are important to me, I can have an explosive temper. Yet another piece of myself I’d rather keep from her. I’m fucking up.
“Please come inside.” Her voice is soft, pleading, and it pulls at me.
I drop my head and hit it on the steering wheel a few times before sliding back out of the truck and following her inside.
K endra
I’m so relieved when I hear his footsteps behind me. I hadn’t expected that kind of reaction to the question that simply popped out. Listening to him, realizing there was so much more to him than the person I’d made him out to be, had prompted me to ask about his age. The moment I hear the door close, I swing around to face him.
I watch him linger just inside the door and take a few steps closer. “You surprised me, just now. I know it’s my own fault, never wanting to look beyond the surface. I’ve been too hung up on my own...issues to look any closer.” I shake my head to clear it, hoping to find the words to explain. “There’s more to you than I’ve given you credit for. Oh,” I add quickly, seeing the clench of his jaw. “I think I’ve always known, which is a big reason why it seemed safer not to look too deep.”
He’s been quietly watching me struggle through my words, and I’m not sure I’m making any sense, but something must have stirred him, because he takes a step toward me.
“I’ve purposely kept you at a distance. Because of our age difference, I let the red flag fly high. Honestly? I think it’s the only thing that I can make into enough of a reason to push you away.” At my words, Neil moves in even closer, only a step away. The look on his face is intense, but no longer angry, and I decide to open up a little more. Before I have a chance to open my mouth, he beats me to it.
“I’ll be thirty-two next month.”
Eight years. Not as bad as the twelve years I thought separated us. Still, eight years.
“I’m forty,” I tell him stupidly.
“I know, and I don’t give a flying fuck,” he says fiercely before adding, “and neither should you.”
“You don’t understand,” I try to explain. “I...my mother...she...” Neil closes the distance between us and cups my face in his hands.
“I. Don’t. Care.”
I don’t have a chance to say
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