Hard Day's Knight

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Authors: John G Hartness
Tags: Humor, Fantasy, Urban Fantasy, Paranormal, Mystery, vampire
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I didn’t. And I won’t. But I can’t help you if you draw attention to us. Deal?”

    She croaked out “Deal,” and we bumped fists. I might be old, but I have a television, so I know Howie Mandel’s shtick as well as anyone.

    “Now, what do you know about your who took your sister?”

    “N-nothing. She went to school like normal, and never came home.”

    “So she made it to school that day, stayed the whole day, left on time, and just never made it home, that’s the deal?”

    “Yeah, from what we can find out. The cops aren’t telling my parents much, and they won’t tell me anything, so I’ve had to eavesdrop and snoop around to find out anything at all. It sounds like she left school just like every other day, and somewhere between school and here, just vanished. I don’t know who would want to steal Lauren; she’s just a little kid. She’s kind of obnoxious sometimes, but she’s a pretty sweet kid, and I don’t know why anybody would want to hurt her.” She started to sniffle, and I sat down next to her on the bed. I’ve never been what anybody would call smooth, and turning into a vampire, much to my disappointment, didn’t turn me into some super-suave sex machine, so I’m not so good with crying girls. I put one arm around her shoulders and just kinda hugged her like that for a minute until she seemed to get herself together.

    “Are you okay?” I asked after a minute. I really hoped she didn’t get any snot on my jacket; it was my favorite one.

    “I think so.”

    “Alright. I don’t think they took your sister for anything she specifically did; I think she was taken for what she is. All the kidnapped children have been around the same age, between nine and thirteen.”

    “What does that matter?”

    “I don’t really know, honestly. Some religions have something they call the age of innocence, where children are still free from sin. Some folks just believe that young kids are inherently innocent, and innocence is valued in some rituals. I don’t understand it all, but it’s a theory we’re working with.”

    “Do you think my little sister was kidnapped by
Satanists
?!?” Her voice went up a little, so I put my hand over her mouth for a second. I really, really didn’t want her dad coming in just then.

    “I don’t really know who has your sister, but this is one theory we’re working on.” I said.

    “Who’s we?” I had really been hoping she wasn’t going to ask that. So naturally she did.

    “I’m part of a firm of private investigators, and we’re looking into some of these disappearances. We think they might all be connected, and this is one angle we’re pursuing.” I was pretty proud of that line of BS. I’d worked on it the whole way over here until it sounded almost realistic even to my ears.

    “Let me see your license.” She scooted away from me on the bed and I started to wonder when this had all gotten screwed up.

    “Huh?” I can go from eloquent BS-artist to inarticulate drooling moron in less than four seconds on a bad day. And this was just another in a string of bad days.

    “If you’re a P.I., let me see your license. How do I know you’re not with the bastards who took my sister? How do I know you’re not here to kidnap me? Why shouldn’t I scream for my father right now?” She was getting a little deer-in-headlights look about her, and I was worried she would do exactly that, so I had to shift over to Plan B.

    “Sleep.” I made my voice very heavy and looked deep into her eyes as I said it. She shook her head once, as if to shake the cobwebs loose, then her eyelids fluttered once, twice, and closed. I laid her down on the bed before she could fall off, and started to make my exit. I closed her door quietly and made it almost to the front door before her father’s voice stopped me cold.

    “Tommy?” He called from the den. Crap.

    “Yes sir?”

    “Are you leaving?”

    “Yes, sir. Janice got upset about Lauren and I

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