Half In Love With Death

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Authors: Emily Ross
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too,” Sheila said.
    Tony grinned. “You two sisters?”
    â€œNo, I’m just hanging out at her house.” I waited for May to invite me too, but she didn’t.
    Tony eyed them.
    â€œYeah, you don’t look a bit like sisters.”
    I watched as they disappeared into May’s house. As we drove down her dark, curving street, it felt strange now that it was just the two of us in the car. He turned to me. “You’d be as pretty as May if you were blonde, prettier maybe.”
    Though I knew this was just flattery, I couldn’t stop smiling.
    â€œThere’s a party at my place tonight. My band’s gonna play,” he added.
    â€œI’m late. I should have been home hours ago.”
    â€œDon’t worry, chickadee. I’m not inviting you.”
    I felt foolish for thinking he was. As he blew a stream of smoke out the window, I took the box with my new patent leather shoes out of the bag at my feet.
    â€œWhat have you got there?” he asked.
    â€œNew shoes.” I lifted the lid and beheld their shiny loveliness, pristine as a frozen pond back east before a single skate had touched it. I missed winter so much. Here, the closest thing to snow was the cold stars that sprinkled the sky. I felt a catch in my throat. What if I never saw snow again? Or Jess?
    Tony rested his arm on the back of my seat. “Jess never liked going to parties with me.” It was as if he’d known I was thinking about her. He went on, “She wanted me all to herself. She didn’t understand I need to have a lot of other people around, but that’s not important now. Nothing is the same anymore.” I followed his gaze out the window. We were in my neighborhood. I’d been down this street many times, but it was like I was seeing the inky palm fronds and soft glow of the streetlights for the first time. Tony was right. Nothing was the same.
    I put the box back in my shopping bag. “Sometimes I think it’s my fault she’s missing.” He glanced at me. “If I’d told Mom right away when she snuck out, they would have looked for her sooner. She might be here right now.” I slouched in my seat.
    â€œAnd I thought everyone blamed me,” Tony said. He laughed as though my confession was really nothing, and I was relieved. He pulled up about a block from my house and said, “If your parents saw me dropping you off, they’d kill me. They don’t understand how much I want to find Jess.”
    I looked down at my hands. “They don’t.”
    â€œCaroline.” His voice made me jump. “Look here.” He leaned close and pointed to a dull purple bruise on his face. “You know how I got that?” I shook my head. He pressed my hand to his cheek. I could almost feel how much it hurt. “One of your dad’s friends. I got other bruises. You want to see?” He began to lift his shirt.
    â€œNo.” I winced. “I’m sorry they did that to you.”
    â€œThey think I know something about Geraldine Keanen. Don’t know how they got that idea. Do you?”
    My stomach tightened. “Probably some stupid rumor kids are spreading.”
    â€œJesus, I hardly knew the girl.”
    I was glad to hear that. “Everyone’s got crazy ideas,” I said.
    â€œThat private eye your dad sent sure asked a lot of questions.”
    â€œMy dad didn’t send him. His boss Ron did.”
    â€œWell, you might want to tell Ron to stop asking me questions and actually start looking for Jess.”
    I sighed. “My dad went to California to look for her, but he didn’t find out anything. He didn’t even go to Schwab’s.”
    â€œUnbelievable. That’s the most important thing he could have done.”
    I smiled. “That’s just what I thought.”
    He glanced at himself in the rearview mirror. “Everyone blames me and you, but sometimes I think we’re the only

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