Read Online Great Granny Webster by Caroline Blackwood - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Caroline Blackwood
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it was just my debilitated state, combined with auntish foolishness. Thatâs poor Poo Poo scratching on my door, darling. Could you be a saint and let the little fellow in?â
I let Poo Poo in, and Aunt Lavinia greeted him with rapturous enthusiasm. He was pleased by her excitement and rolled and wriggled on her white silk coverlet, while she patted and praised him and told him that for her he would always be the dog of all dogs.
âTo get back to why I felt such anxiety for you while I was in hospital ...â Aunt Lavinia had just pacified Poo Poo by resting him on her lap and allowing him to chew on a rubber bone. âI kept wondering if it was quite normal the way you often just sit there so quietly being an excellent listener, looking very serious and charming and all that, but not contributing very much at all.â
She got up from the bed, and there was something uncharacteristically brusque and almost irritable in her movements. She said she was going to find her dog some charcoal biscuits, and she rummaged in a drawer. Then she flopped down again in a relaxed position on her bed, feeding Poo Poo the black crumbly squares, and it surprised me that someone who was in many ways so very fastidious seemed not to care that the blackened saliva from Poo Pooâs jaws was dribbling down and making dark stains on her white and spotless bed cover.
âThinking about you,â Aunt Lavinia said, âI felt you still have much too much youthful over-intensity. I think you should try to lose some of that. I also feel that in general you should try to be more socially at ease and expansive. Shyness is all right. But only to a point, and yours can sometimes seem quite oppressive.â
Aunt Lavinia threw me another kiss.
âI adore you. You are at ease with me because you know me very well and I can make you laugh and draw you out of your shell. But Iâve sometimes seen you with other people and you havenât opened your mouth the entire evening. Youâve given the appearance of being just about as vivacious, interesting and delightful to meet as our mutual relation in Hoveâthat sainted old sourpuss Mrs Webster ...â
Aunt Lavinia saw my look of horror, and she held out both her arms to me in an affectionate gesture as if she wanted to hug me.
âIâm exaggerating,â she said. âDonât take me literally. I find that one often has to exaggerate in order to make oneâs point. I donât think that anyone has ever felt that you in any way resemble old Granny Webster. But I still think you should remember her example and let it be a caution to you ...â
Aunt Lavinia peeled off her nylon stockings and said she couldnât decide whether it was worth the effort to varnish her toenails.
âI feel a need to do something while Iâm delivering lectures. If I was a lady of the ancien régime I would be scolding you and also doing my petit point .â
She decided not to paint her toenailsâthat no one would care if she painted them anyway. She said she was only going to lecture me for a few more minutes and then she would try and think of something that would be fun for us both to do.
âNo one has ever thought you were like old Mrs Webster,â Aunt Lavinia said. âBut Iâm afraid, darling, they have found you rather odd in the way you sit there at parties looking so goggle-eyed and tongue-tied. When you are with strangers you are so withdrawn that everyone finds your presence rather alarming. You just sit there staring at everyone in that intense, tormented way. You really must try to stop doing that, because it makes people nervous. They wonder whether youâve got something gravely wrong with you. They wonder whether you are quite all right in the head.â
Aunt Lavinia was clearly worried that she might have been too critical and upset me. She hadnât intended to be harsh and deliver such a sermon. She explained that
I let Poo Poo in, and Aunt Lavinia greeted him with rapturous enthusiasm. He was pleased by her excitement and rolled and wriggled on her white silk coverlet, while she patted and praised him and told him that for her he would always be the dog of all dogs.
âTo get back to why I felt such anxiety for you while I was in hospital ...â Aunt Lavinia had just pacified Poo Poo by resting him on her lap and allowing him to chew on a rubber bone. âI kept wondering if it was quite normal the way you often just sit there so quietly being an excellent listener, looking very serious and charming and all that, but not contributing very much at all.â
She got up from the bed, and there was something uncharacteristically brusque and almost irritable in her movements. She said she was going to find her dog some charcoal biscuits, and she rummaged in a drawer. Then she flopped down again in a relaxed position on her bed, feeding Poo Poo the black crumbly squares, and it surprised me that someone who was in many ways so very fastidious seemed not to care that the blackened saliva from Poo Pooâs jaws was dribbling down and making dark stains on her white and spotless bed cover.
âThinking about you,â Aunt Lavinia said, âI felt you still have much too much youthful over-intensity. I think you should try to lose some of that. I also feel that in general you should try to be more socially at ease and expansive. Shyness is all right. But only to a point, and yours can sometimes seem quite oppressive.â
Aunt Lavinia threw me another kiss.
âI adore you. You are at ease with me because you know me very well and I can make you laugh and draw you out of your shell. But Iâve sometimes seen you with other people and you havenât opened your mouth the entire evening. Youâve given the appearance of being just about as vivacious, interesting and delightful to meet as our mutual relation in Hoveâthat sainted old sourpuss Mrs Webster ...â
Aunt Lavinia saw my look of horror, and she held out both her arms to me in an affectionate gesture as if she wanted to hug me.
âIâm exaggerating,â she said. âDonât take me literally. I find that one often has to exaggerate in order to make oneâs point. I donât think that anyone has ever felt that you in any way resemble old Granny Webster. But I still think you should remember her example and let it be a caution to you ...â
Aunt Lavinia peeled off her nylon stockings and said she couldnât decide whether it was worth the effort to varnish her toenails.
âI feel a need to do something while Iâm delivering lectures. If I was a lady of the ancien régime I would be scolding you and also doing my petit point .â
She decided not to paint her toenailsâthat no one would care if she painted them anyway. She said she was only going to lecture me for a few more minutes and then she would try and think of something that would be fun for us both to do.
âNo one has ever thought you were like old Mrs Webster,â Aunt Lavinia said. âBut Iâm afraid, darling, they have found you rather odd in the way you sit there at parties looking so goggle-eyed and tongue-tied. When you are with strangers you are so withdrawn that everyone finds your presence rather alarming. You just sit there staring at everyone in that intense, tormented way. You really must try to stop doing that, because it makes people nervous. They wonder whether youâve got something gravely wrong with you. They wonder whether you are quite all right in the head.â
Aunt Lavinia was clearly worried that she might have been too critical and upset me. She hadnât intended to be harsh and deliver such a sermon. She explained that
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