Read Online Good Fortune (9781416998631) by Noni Carter - Free Book Online Page A

know something I didn’t want to believe? I itched to get away, to escape confronting the very thing that frightened me when I worked in the Big House, anticipating the worst. But my feet remained firmly planted.
    â€œHe didn’t do nothin’, John.”
    â€œHe didn’t do nothin’? That the whole truth?” He questioned me calmly, but I heard a hint of mockery and anger, whether imagined or not.
    â€œNaw, it wa’an’t nothin’. Jus’ a lotta talk comin’ from him.” I paused, then frowned into his eyes.
    â€œBut you already know what he wants…. You already know….” I frowned deeper. What right did John have to stand here and question me like he was? Was he blaming me for Masta’s intentions? It was my turn to show anger, and it leaked from my thoughts, misdirected, and seeped into my words.
    â€œHe didn’t do nothin’, John. That’s the truth—ain’t nothin’ else I can say! But I don’t understand. What you gonna do anyhow if Masta come to me askin’ fo’ what we both know he wanted? You gonna lash him with his own whip?” I was waiting for him to walk away—I wanted him to—to leave me to my solitude with my own fears and my own doubts.
    But he stood there battling with the frowns in his cheeks, figuring how to reckon with his own pride, a stripped, bare pride that was being tested, scorned, and drained away, drop by drop, like blood from a slaughtered pig. My heart softened. He was as much a victim as I was, and he seemed wise enough to know that. “John, you really hearin’ me? I’m telling you the truth. Don’t you believe me?”
    He nodded slowly, sadly. “’Course I do.”
    â€œWell, you ain’t tell Daniel ’bout Masta Jeffrey, have you?” I asked softly, the anger dipping out of sight as quickly as it had come. He shook his head slowly, his eyes distant, staring through me.
    â€œDon’t want you to tell Daniel ’bout Masta even talkin’ to me on the hill that day. You won’t tell ’im?” His gaze was returning back to focus.
    â€œSarah, there’s some things—”
    â€œJohn, I know Daniel. Don’t want him gettin’ beat an’ killed ova somethin’ that ain’t even happen. He’s different from you. He ain’t gonna …” But seeing the look that passed over John’s face, I hesitated, having second thoughts on whether or not my brother and John were as unalike as I thought. He seemed to be struggling, as if his maskof passiveness wasn’t fitting quite well. I dragged my eyes away once again and drew circles in the dirt with my foot.
    â€œI’m scared, John. Think Masta might change his mind an’ leave me be? Think he might change an’ be like his father, who don’t mess with none of us like that?” I searched his eyes for an answer, for security, for a place to hide from reality. But nothing of the like lay there. Instead, I saw the truth that he would never bring himself to say.
    Sarah, there’s nothing I can do.
    But instead of expressing what we both knew was true, John lifted his hand to my face. He paused for a moment and then soon began running his fingers across my cheek, wiping away a water droplet that had escaped from my hair. I let his fingers linger there and brush against my skin until they settled under my chin, lifting it slightly. Then he let go.
    â€œA mind cain’t rest on those things too long, Sarah. It’s dangerous fo’ a man. But I think you oughta know, I bin tryin’ to figure somethin’ out.” His face was changing, masking the pain and replacing it with a sort of lighthearted look.
    â€œBin thinkin’ an’ thinkin’, then finally figured there ain’t nothin’ really to figure out,” he continued. “I found that I feel different, like I’m gone from the world when