Girl, Going on 16: Pants on Fire

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Authors: Sue Limb
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watch the news. (’There’s been a terrible fire in Australia, dear – but they’ve managed to save some of the koalas.’) The kitchen phone was now divinely free and private. It was the perfect moment. Jess dialled Fred’s home number and waited with a thudding heart. Fred’s mum answered.
    ‘Hi! This is Jess. Could I speak to Fred, please?’
    ‘Oh, sorry, Jess,’ said Fred’s mum. ‘But he’s not home yet. Apparently he’s gone over to – what’s his name? – Buster’s. They’re doing some kind of project, or so he said.’
    ‘Doing a project, yeah,’ said Jess ironically, trying to ignore the sinking of her heart. ‘Pigging out in front of mythical violence for the hundredth time, more like.’
    ‘You’re so right,’ said Fred’s mum with a light chuckle.
    ‘Well,’ said Jess. ‘Thanks. See you soon.’
    ‘I hope so,’ said Fred’s mum, with just the faintest hint of regret. ‘We haven’t seen you for a day or two, have we? Well, come round any time. You know you’ll always be welcome.’
    Fred’s mum had certainly noticed something. Jess rang off trying to sound as cheery as possible, even though her heart had plummeted back towards the boiling centre of the earth.
    She couldn’t possibly phone Fred on his mobile while he was watching movies with Tom and Buster eavesdropping on his every word. She would just have to wait.
    Jess was suddenly desperately lonesome. She went to Granny’s room, eager to share even the TV news with her. She was prepared to sit through a whole succession of natural disasters, terrorist outrages and tragic famines if only she could hold Granny’s hand.
    But Granny was asleep. How extremely tactless! Jess sighed with exasperation, quite loudly, hoping that Granny might hear and awake, open her cute little old arms and say, ‘Give me a cuddle, darling! I feel so depressed after that weather forecast.’
    But no. Granny dozed on, her lips rippling slightly with each breath. ‘No, John!’ she said suddenly, and smiled in her sleep. Granny was dreaming about Grandpa! Possibly, in her dreams, they were both twenty again . . .
    Jess tiptoed hastily out, leaving Granny to dream in peace. Granny’s romance with Grandpa had been idyllic – not like Jess and Fred’s turbulent on-off relationship. Jess badly needed a distraction. If only Mum was available. But she was still sitting out in the garden with Mr Nishizawa. There was a kind of picnic table with a couple of benches down the far end of the garden, and they were down there having their English Conversation, even though the sun had already sunk well below the neighbour’s hawthorn hedge.
    I know , thought Jess, I’ll offer them some tea. Then I might at least find out when he’s going . She put on a sweet and innocent smile. It wasn’t really her sort of thing, but somehow she felt on her best behaviour with Mr Nishizawa around.
    ‘Hi, Mum! Mr Nishizawa!’ said Jess. They looked up, and Mr Nishizawa leapt to his feet, which was quite hard to do when you’re sitting at a picnic table with integral benches. He bowed, and his brown eyes sparkled. Wow, was he the business!
    ‘Good evening!’ he said, then, laughing, he turned to Mum. ‘Not goodnight!’ he added.
    They both laughed for what seemed like a rather insanely long time.
    ‘Yes,’ said Jess, wanting to move the conversation on. ‘ Good evening , very good, terrific. Sorry to disturb you, Mum, but I wondered if you would like some tea?’
    ‘Oh, no thanks, love,’ said Mum. ‘And by the way, we’re going out tonight. Nori is taking me to a concert. A Japanese pianist is playing and Nori knows him slightly. We’ll go round afterwards and probably have a drink with him or something, so I might be back a bit late. Don’t wait up.’
    ‘Great, fantastic!’ said Jess, trying not to betray her deep disappointment and disgust at this news. ‘Have fun. Oh, by the way, Mum – could you write me a note for tomorrow, please? About missing

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