that guiding one another was one of the most primary purposes of their lives.
Becoming Corrine"s guide in meditation, for example. Young and confused, recovering from the terrible starvation sickness that had almost killed her as it had Mary"s mate, who could allow such a lost one to go without guidance and support? It would be barbaric.
Siddah were another example. Being the Demon version of what humans called a godparent was the duty of every Demon. All adults and Elders fostered the children of their loved ones, giving them the firmer hand of guidance that sometimes parents had difficulty doing themselves. Legna was of course Siddah to two of her sister"s children. However, beyond that as-yet-unrealized role, she was also one of many Mind and Body Demons who became mentors to the dissatisfied souls of Demons who had lost their internal compasses.
Had she, too, fallen into this disturbing category?
Or was she only just beginning a journey toward that disembodied state of being? Oddly enough, the nature of her feelings led her to suspect that all the attention and constant companionship that would follow any sort of confession of restlessness would be exactly the opposite of what she wanted.
She had felt this way ever since the Summoning. It had come on her gradually at first, almost unnoticed.
Then she had begun to display short bursts of temper, something she had almost never done before. It had been excusable the first and second time it had happened, considering what she had gone through, but what about the third time? The fourth? It was so out of her character that it was a wonder she wasn"t already in the midst of a mentored intervention. Then again, she had gone out of her way to hide the occurrences, smoothing them over in a way that probably only a skilled Mind Demon could get away with, using her mind and her ability to draw in those of any power with the enchantment of her soothing voice. But along with those soft manipulations of emotions and people"s perceptions of her temper came guilt and remorse and the feeling that she was misusing her abilities. This only added to her confusion. Demons were rarely apologetic for the things they did with their abilities. What was the purpose of a power if it went unused? And she agreed with that. Usage of ability deserved no excuses, unless it betrayed the boundaries of the law or certain moral and professional ethics.
She would have been lying if she told herself these alterations in her perspectives and personality did not frighten her. There wasn"t a night that went by that she didn"t speculate that perhaps Bella"s protection during the Summoning had not been as complete as they had all thought. Before Legna"s rescue, there had been only one Demon to ever be retrieved quickly from a necromancer"s pentagram. The result had been tragic, the pitiable creature rapidly going mad, attacking his brethren and behaving in manic and perverted ways. So the rescue had meant nothing, and Jacob had been forced to destroy the tormented soul after all.
What if that was slowly happening to her as well?
Perhaps she was being foolish and arrogant to believe she would be the only Demon to ever escape a Summoning completely unscathed. If this was the case, did it make her a coward that she wasn"t doing the right thing and letting someone know her fears?
Legna gained her feet again, rubbing her hands together as if they were chilled, pacing the ornate woven carpet that covered the stone floor, her silken slippers barely making a whisper of sound and the sheer outer panels of her gown fluttering in the breeze her movements created.
Realizing what she was doing, she stopped short, glancing heavenward and seeking strength for a moment.
She moved to the window, pulling the drapes aside so she could see the vast lawns and gardens that stretched out before the grand castle. Noah"s choice of a home was clearly a throwback to the time in which he had been born. Like him, she had always felt
Becoming Corrine"s guide in meditation, for example. Young and confused, recovering from the terrible starvation sickness that had almost killed her as it had Mary"s mate, who could allow such a lost one to go without guidance and support? It would be barbaric.
Siddah were another example. Being the Demon version of what humans called a godparent was the duty of every Demon. All adults and Elders fostered the children of their loved ones, giving them the firmer hand of guidance that sometimes parents had difficulty doing themselves. Legna was of course Siddah to two of her sister"s children. However, beyond that as-yet-unrealized role, she was also one of many Mind and Body Demons who became mentors to the dissatisfied souls of Demons who had lost their internal compasses.
Had she, too, fallen into this disturbing category?
Or was she only just beginning a journey toward that disembodied state of being? Oddly enough, the nature of her feelings led her to suspect that all the attention and constant companionship that would follow any sort of confession of restlessness would be exactly the opposite of what she wanted.
She had felt this way ever since the Summoning. It had come on her gradually at first, almost unnoticed.
Then she had begun to display short bursts of temper, something she had almost never done before. It had been excusable the first and second time it had happened, considering what she had gone through, but what about the third time? The fourth? It was so out of her character that it was a wonder she wasn"t already in the midst of a mentored intervention. Then again, she had gone out of her way to hide the occurrences, smoothing them over in a way that probably only a skilled Mind Demon could get away with, using her mind and her ability to draw in those of any power with the enchantment of her soothing voice. But along with those soft manipulations of emotions and people"s perceptions of her temper came guilt and remorse and the feeling that she was misusing her abilities. This only added to her confusion. Demons were rarely apologetic for the things they did with their abilities. What was the purpose of a power if it went unused? And she agreed with that. Usage of ability deserved no excuses, unless it betrayed the boundaries of the law or certain moral and professional ethics.
She would have been lying if she told herself these alterations in her perspectives and personality did not frighten her. There wasn"t a night that went by that she didn"t speculate that perhaps Bella"s protection during the Summoning had not been as complete as they had all thought. Before Legna"s rescue, there had been only one Demon to ever be retrieved quickly from a necromancer"s pentagram. The result had been tragic, the pitiable creature rapidly going mad, attacking his brethren and behaving in manic and perverted ways. So the rescue had meant nothing, and Jacob had been forced to destroy the tormented soul after all.
What if that was slowly happening to her as well?
Perhaps she was being foolish and arrogant to believe she would be the only Demon to ever escape a Summoning completely unscathed. If this was the case, did it make her a coward that she wasn"t doing the right thing and letting someone know her fears?
Legna gained her feet again, rubbing her hands together as if they were chilled, pacing the ornate woven carpet that covered the stone floor, her silken slippers barely making a whisper of sound and the sheer outer panels of her gown fluttering in the breeze her movements created.
Realizing what she was doing, she stopped short, glancing heavenward and seeking strength for a moment.
She moved to the window, pulling the drapes aside so she could see the vast lawns and gardens that stretched out before the grand castle. Noah"s choice of a home was clearly a throwback to the time in which he had been born. Like him, she had always felt
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