math, which is just passing out the textbooks and a bunch of
numbers chalked on the blackboard, you can hear the whispers in the hall.
Like, hey, who’s the midget? And, there goes Mad Max; and, excuse me while I barf;
and, look what escaped from the freak show; and, oh, my gawd that’s disgusting .
“Maxwell Kane?”
This is from Mrs. Donelli, the English teacher, she’s new to the school, and when
I nod and raise my pencil, she goes, “Maxwell, will you please stand up and tell the
class something about your summer?”
Which, if she wasn’t new to the school, she’d know better, because getting up in the
class and saying stuff is not something I do.
“Maxwell,” she goes, “is there a problem?”
By now there’s a lot of noise and kids are shouting stuff like, “Forget it, Mrs. Donelli,
his brain is in his tail!”
“Ask him to count, he can paw the ground!”
“Maxi Pad! Maxi Pad! Ask him quick about his dad!”
“Killer Kane! Killer Kane! Had a kid who got no brain!”
Mrs. Donelli has this look like she stepped in something and she can’t get it off
her shoe. The shouting and singing goes on and on, and pretty soon some of the kids
are throwing stuff at us, pencils and erasers and wadded-up paper, and it’s like Mrs.
Donelli has no idea what to do about it, the room is out of control.
Then Freak climbs up on his desk, which makes him about as big as a normal person
standing up, and he starts shouting at the top of his lungs.
“Order!” he shouts. “Order in the court! Let justice be heard!”
For some reason, maybe because he looks so fierce with his jaw sticking out and his
little fists all balled up and the way he’s stamping his crooked little feet, everybody
shuts up and there’s this spooky silence.
Finally Mrs. Donelli says, “You must be Kevin, is that right?”
Freak has this look, he’s still acting really fierce, and he goes, “Sometimes, I am.”
“Sometimes? What does that mean?”
“It means sometimes I’m more than Kevin.”
“Oh,” says Mrs. Donelli, and you can tell she has no idea what he’s talking about,
but she thinks it’s important to let him talk. “So, Kevin,” she says, “can you give
us all an example?”
Next thing I know, Freak has his hands on my head and he’s getting himself on my shoulders
and he’s tugging at me in a way that I knowmeans “stand up,” and so I do it, I stand right up in class and I can see Mrs. Donelli’s
eyes getting bigger and bigger.
I’m standing there with Freak high above me and it feels right, it makes me feel strong
and smart.
“How’s this for an example?” Freak is saying. “Sometimes we’re nine feet tall, and strong enough
to walk through walls. Sometimes we fight gangs. Sometimes we find treasure. Sometimes
we slay dragons and drink from the Holy Grail!”
Mrs. Donelli is backing up to her desk and she says, “Oh, my, that’s very interesting,
I’m sure, but could you both just sit down?”
But Freak is riding me like he’s the jockey and I’m the horse, he’s steering me around
the class room, showing off. He’s raising his fist and punching it in the air and
going, “Freak the Mighty! Freak the Mighty!” and pretty soon he’s got all the other
kids chanting, “Freak the Mighty! Freak the Mighty! Freak the Mighty!” even though
they don’t know what he’s talking about, or what it means.
I’m standing up straight, as tall as I can, and I’m marching exactly like he wants
me to, right and left, backwards and forwards, and it’s like music or something, like
I don’t even have to think about it, I just do it, and all those kids chanting our
name, and Mrs. Donelli has no idea what’s going on, she’s definitely flipped out and
more or less hiding behind her desk.
The whole class is raising their fists in the air and chanting: “Freak the Mighty!
Freak the Mighty! Freak the Mighty!”
I can’t explain why, but it
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