Read Online Eat, Drink and Be Wary by Tamar Myers - Free Book Online Page A

involuntarily. "I beg your pardon?"
     
     
"A real live wire. You've got sass. I like that in a person."
     
     
"I do not have sass," I said hotly. "I'm just a mild-mannered woman with an attitude."
     
     
"You see what I mean? Anyway, you'd make a great judge. You've got exactly what it takes."
     
     
I stood up. "Mr. Mitchell, I don't have time to sit here and play games. Not if you want me schlepping your guests into town on a field trip."
     
     
"Schleeping?"
     
     
"Babs says that - she's a frequent guest here. It means - "
     
     
"I know what it means. Now give me one good reason why you couldn't be a judge."
     
     
"Because one of your contestants is my cook. She also happens to be my cousin. Not to mention my closest friend."
     
     
He put his well-manicured hands together, fingertip to fingertip, forming a tent. "And you don't think you're capable of making an impartial decision?"
     
     
I stared at him. What a silly question. I am the fairest person I know. At the risk of sounding vain, King Solomon and I are soul siblings. Unfortunately, impartiality does not seem to be valued highly in today's world. I've played hostess to a few presidents since the inn opened, and the fact that none of them has offered me an appointment to the Supreme Court baffles me.
     
     
"Well, could you?" he asked.
     
     
"Does a cow have four teats?"
     
     
The fingertips did a nervous dance. He was obviously a city boy.
     
     
I made it easy. "Do politicians lie?"
     
     
"Excellent! Welcome aboard, Miss Yoder. One more thing - would you be so kind as to not tell anyone about this, until I make an official announcement?"
     
     
"Cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye. And you may call me Magdalena, if you wish." I know, that was very generous on my part, but after all, we were now colleagues of a sort.
     
     
"Then you may call me George." He winked. "And if you're really good - Georgie Boy."
     
     
I recoiled I horror, and justifiably so. Aaron Daniel Miller, my pseudo-ex-husband, used to refer to a significant portion of himself as Danny boy. There was no way on God's good earth that I was ever gong to get that well acquainted with George Mitchell.
     
     
"That was a joke," he said quickly.
     
     
Perhaps I'd misunderstood. "My sister calls me Mags," I said charitably.
     
     
"If you don't mind, I prefer Magdalena. Mag-da-len-a. What a beautiful name. it just seems to roll off the tongue."
     
     
I could feel myself blush. It's possible I even twittered.
     
     
"it suits you well," he said.
     
     
I twittered some more, and might not have come to my senses in time, had it not been for Freni.
     
     
"Ach, there you are!" she said, bustling into the room. "Where - "She stopped, eying our mugs with the telltale rings of cocoa. "So it was you who made a mess of my kitchen!"
     
     
"Mr. Mitchell and I were cold, Freni. Besides. You weren't anywhere around."
     
     
"I was out gathering eggs, Magdalena. They don't gather themselves, you know."
     
     
I gave her a placating smile. "Pull up a chair and join us, dear."
     
     
"Ach!" she threw up her hands. Freni won't sit still until well after she's dead. Work is what the Good Lord expects of us, and my cousin is not about to let Him down.
     
     
"Say, Dreni, what's this I hear about two pans of bread pudding? When we asked for seconds last night, you said there wasn't any left."
     
     
Frnei turned the color of pickled egg. "I do not lie, Magdalena Portulacca Yoder!"
     
     
"I wasn't suggesting that you did." I winked at Mr. Mitchell. "Maybe you just forgot that you made that extra pan."
     
     
"That pan was for Mose, if you must know. Bread pudding is his favorite, and I don't have time to make it anymore, thanks to all the work you have me do around here."
     
     
I ignored her implication that I am a slave driver. "But Susannah said she found it in the fridge in the middle of the night."
     
     
Freni's color deepened. "Ach, so I forgot to