Doing It

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Authors: Melvin Burgess
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was, an amazing sight – Jonathon enjoying a feeding frenzy with Deborah Sanderson on the stairs.
    Jonathon had no idea how it had happened. They’d been talking at the bottom of the stairs and it was bit embarrassing because every time someone went up or down they had to squeeze past and Deborah had to push right up against him. That was a bit obvious, Deborah being a bit of a plumper. Jonathon was embarrassed – partly for her, but mainly because he didn’t want to be seen squashed up against her like that. He got teased enough about his friendship with her without that.
    The kiss had come out of nowhere – he couldn’t even remember how it started. He had wondered so often how you actually knew when it was right to kiss a girl, that even as he was doing it, he was trying to work out what had happened so he could use it next time with someone he really fancied. Then, once it had started, it just went on. Deborah sighed, closed her eyes, pulled him almost on top of her and let him sink into her. Immediately, he was overtaken with a rage of hormones. Deborah felt his erection against her stomach and smiled up at him. She grabbed hold of his bum and moved him gently from side to side so that it rocked against her, twitching like Frankenstein’s monster in an electric storm. He let his hands creep round her to cuddle a breast. They half fell, half walked a couple of steps up the stairs and collapsed. Jonathon slid his hand under her top and stroked her bra.
    Not having known how it started, he had no idea how to stop it, either, even though he was embarrassed to be snogging a fat girl on the stairs where everyone could not only see but had to squeeze past in order to get up and down. Under her loose clothes he felt her all over – every bit that he could get to, anyway. Only when he began to ferret under her knickers did she open her eyes and whisper, ‘Not here.’ She smiled a languid, warm smile at him and her eyes drifted up to the landing. Terrified, Jonathon closed his eyes and kissed her again, more deeply than ever. He didn’t want to be doing this. Or did he? Traitorously, his penis had turned to super-hard concrete in his jeans. Deborah was surreptitiously rubbing it with the back of her hand and he felt so good, he thought he could happily die.
    ‘But I don’t fancy her!’ Jonathon tried unconsciously to explain, but Mr Knobby Knobster grinned his woozy little hard man’s smile and said, ‘Yeah? But I do.’
    It seemed to go on for hours. He was curled up almost on top of her and they were taking big, long, syrupy slurps of each other’s face. A steady stream of people were squeezing past on their way up and down the stairs. In the course of half an hour or so, everyone there would have seen what he was up to, and who it was with. He was feeling more and more uncomfortable, but he had no idea how to extricate himself.
    ‘Jonathon. I see you’re having a good party.’
    He opened his eyes and saw Dino and Ben standing at the bottom of the stairs watching him. Dino was smiling like a flint. Ben was staring at Deborah, fascinated by this sudden glimpse of the woman sunk in a sexual trance. Deborah’s face hung beneath him, her eyes closed, her lips wet, half open, relaxed, hungry. She opened her eyes and looked sideways at Ben. Ben smiled, made a ‘Hi,’ face, but she just smiled slightly at him before closing her eyes and held her face back under Jonathon’s to be kissed. Lowering his, he began to feed. When he peeked out again a moment later, they were gone.
    Jonathon came to a sudden decision.
    ‘I need a wee,’ he said, and immediately panicked at the thought that she might want to come with him up the stairs. ‘Out in the garden, the queue’s too long,’ he finished quickly. He leaped off her; the image came into his mind of a small raptor leaping off the carcass of a dead sauropod. Wincing, he jumped down the stairs and ran out into the kitchen.
    Behind him, Deborah got up and rearranged

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