“She’s asleep,” I said.
“But nothing unusual has happened?” asked Mom.
“Like what?”
“Like anything.”
Does staying out until two count?
“Um…no, she’s good,” I said with a twinge of guilt. I lied on a regular basis when I was doing stuff for Dad, but I’d never gotten comfortable with lying to Mom. Probably because she usually caught me.
Mom took my coffee and downed the remainder.
“Why are you acting like Aunt Tenne’s a crazy person you have to watch?” I asked.
Mom and Dixie exchanged a look. Great, more stuff people won’t tell me.
“We’re not going to go sit in a graveyard today, are we?”
“Did you see a graveyard? Did Tenne see it?”
“No and no. What is up with you?”
“Nothing. Let’s get breakfast. Class is at eight thirty. Did you study your materials last night?”
“Yes, Mom. And I have to say studying on my first night of vacation was awesome.”
We found a table with a fabulous view and ordered banana pancakes.
“Stop complaining,” said Mom. “You’ll be certified in three days.”
“Great. Crossing off a goal I never had.”
Dixie laughed at us and then smiled out at the glaring sand and water. It was going to be a hot one.
Mauro was waiting for us at the dive shop, wearing a pair of European swim trunks and by that I mean very, very small. And tight. And small.
Stop looking, you freak.
“Mercy,” said Mom.
“What?” I asked.
“Mauro asked you a question.”
I blushed so hard I think my skin sizzled. “I’m sorry. What did you say?”
“Did you take all of your tests on PADI?” asked Mauro. His face was totally deadpan, but his eyes were laughing at me.
“Yeah, I did.”
“Alright then. We will start our classwork as soon as the others arrive.”
On cue Lucia and Graeme walked in, holding hands, and I couldn’t stop looking at her suit either. It was made for old ladies, an oversized tankini with a skirt that went down to mid-thigh. Lucia had a nice figure, beautifully proportioned. What was she covering up? Graeme had a beach bag the size of a sofa cushion. I hoped Lucia had her inhaler in there.
Mauro asked them about their tests and the rest of our class arrived. The Land’s End dad, Todd, came in carrying a backpack. He asked if they had lockers and where he should put his water. Mauro showed him the lockers and the Gmucas came in. Frankie had the kind of suit I was used to men wearing, to the knee with lots of pockets. Linda wore a leopard skin confection that looked like it may have been stuck on with tape. Last to arrive were three guys about my age. We heard them well before they came into the dive shop. Their laughter echoed off the walls and palm trees.
“Dude, you were so drunk,” said the first to enter, a short, stocky blond with a military style haircut. Next was a taller man, thin with wavy brown hair and a large diamond stud in one ear. The third was same height as the second. He had espresso-colored skin and light brown eyes. He struck me as the kind of guy who wouldn’t wear a diamond stud if his life depended on it.
“Welcome,” said Mauro, extending his hand. “You are?”
The blond shook his hand. “Hi. I’m Joe and this is Andrew and Colin.”
Colin, the brunette, let out a piercing whistle. “This resort gets better and better.”
He was looking at me in a way that wasn’t flattering, but clearly he thought it was. He elbowed Joe in the ribs. “Did you arrange this?”
The smile Joe had on for Mauro froze on his face. Andrew fidgeted and looked at his feet.
“Arranged?” asked Mauro.
“You know,” said Colin, “a festive little treat to send Andrew off into wedded bliss. Come on over here, hottie. Let’s see what you’ve got. We can afford it.”
Holy crap. He thinks I’m a prostitute.
I was about to give him the mother of all tell-offs, when my mother marched across the shop and put
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