Read Online Dick Longg: Sexual Saviour of the Universe by Mark Leigh - Free Book Online Page B

future of 2150 and not some weird throwback era. The British people must know what life is like outside their borders. What it’s like in the real world’, Dick stated, demonstrating rare logic that surprised even him.
    ‘To all intents and purposes’, Taylor explained. ‘These countries don’t exist’.  
    It was time for Dick to frown again.
    ‘The Party have, in effect, cut themselves off from the outside world. There is obviously some contact to enable the import and export of food or goods, but this is very tightly controlled and monitored. Unlike the original Victorians who wanted to expand their empire and protect their colonies, the Party practice a much more severe and extreme form of “Splendid Isolation”. That way they have control over the population’.
    ‘So most people don’t have any idea of what sex can be like or what they’re missing?’, Dick enquired.
    ‘Not really. Any stories that have been passed down are dismissed as old wives’ tales or fanciful myths. And it doesn’t matter if anyone believes them anyway; the Party will detect and make sure they stamp out any “unnatural” acts or behaviour before they can spread’.                      
    ‘Yeah, but according to the Party, having sex more than once a week is an “unnatural act'!” exclaimed Dick. ‘l could tell the Party a thing or two about unnatural acts that would make their hair curl! Sex with pets. Inserting fruit in your ass. Inserting fruit in your pet’s ass. Inserting pets in your ass   - with or without fruit’.                  
    ‘Ass?’, asked Taylor .
    ‘You know, your rectum…’, explained Dick who suddenly smelled that distinctive rose-scented perfume again.
    ‘But why would you want to insert a pet in your rectum?’ asked a soft, feminine voice.
    Dick turned around to see that Alice had entered the room.
    ‘Good question’, Dick responded, slightly embarrassed. ‘The thing is, I personally don’t know, but people got turned on by many different things’.
    ‘Turned-on?’, Alice enquired blankly.
    ‘Yeah. You know. Get off to’.
    More blank looks. ‘Stuff that gives you the horn’, continued Dick.
    Alice looked even more confused, ‘The horn?’
    ‘Stuff that makes you aroused ...sexually excited’.
    Alice nodded her comprehension and Dick continued. ‘In my time there was a market for photographing and filming every variation of the sex act. People wanted to see heterosexual sex, same-sex sex, group sex, sex with dwarves, sex with fat people, sex with old ladies, sex with transsexuals, sex with transvestites, sex with old fat dwarf transsexuals.
    ‘There was a demand for seeing people dressed up having sex’, continued Dick. ‘I'm not just talking about revealing outfits or sexy uniforms, I'm talking about dressing-up as bee-keepers, fishermen, coal miners, even deep sea divers complete with the big brass helmets and lead boots. Hell, I know of two films, ‘Three Ring Circus’ and ‘Banging Bozo’ where the male star was a sex-crazed clown. I guess some people out there found size 24 shoes, green hair and a bright red nose erotic’.
    ‘And it was a fact, was it not,’ interrupted Taylor , ‘That many people liked watching others being harmed when they had sex - or they derived pleasure from harming others?’
    ‘True’, confirmed Dick. ‘There was a huge market for movies featuring people being spanked, whipped, beaten or punched. And don’t even get me started on golden showers’.
    ‘Golden what?’, asked Alice .
    Dick opened his mouth to explain but as the words were on the way from his brain to his mouth another part of his brain went into action to comprehend how ridiculous his explanation would sound and fortunately the two actions cancelled each other out. While a completely different part of Dick’s brain considered what to do next, Taylor interjected to save Dick’s embarrassment.
    ‘Well, that’s enough small talk for now. We’ve got