Read Online Dial M for Monkey by Adam Maxwell - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Adam Maxwell
Tags: Fiction, Fiction - General, Short Stories, Short Stories (Single Author), Short Stories & Fiction Anthologies
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them back, instead keeping my hands occupied by scratching every last inch of my feather-tormented body.
‘Yes,’ I wheezed and dragged myself inside after them.
Inside a caught a glimpse of the last few of them heading down the hall towards the dining room and the kitchen. Against the advise of my ever-tightening lungs I followed them.
‘Bok-BWARK! This fridge,’ they boomed. ‘How many eggs does it hold?’
I knew deep down inside that I should tell them the truth but I was relying on the fact that none of the little blighters had opposable thumbs.
‘I dunno,’ I panted. ‘I never really counted. A lot, I know that.’
Their little heads bobbed up and down in happy agreement.
Then there was a scratching at the door. It was the cock.
About The Author
A dam Maxwell was born in 1976 and has written for a plethora of publications including Dave Eggers' McSweeney's . According to his wife he has an 'unhealthy obsession' with Bob Dylan and the Beatles, and manages to be 'increasingly worrying' in a number of other areas. He has a Masters Degree in Creative Writing from Northumbria University, and lives in the wilds of Northumberland. This is his first book.
You can see much, much more of his work at www.adammaxwell.com including stories, tools for writers and an award-winning short story podcast.
D ial M For Monkey was originally published by Tonto Books and is still available to buy in paperback. Should you wish to do so why not check out Tonto's website www.tontobooks.co.uk or head over to your friendly neighbourhood branch of Amazon.
The author would like to take the opportunity to thank John Hardy for the cover design and artwork as well as Robin Brown who came up with the idea in the first place.
This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 License. To view a copy of this license, visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.5/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, 543 Howard Street, 5th Floor, San Francisco, California, 94105, USA.
From the same author on Feedbooks
The Night Before The Christmas Before I Was Married & other festive tales (2009)
Charles Dickens has dominated the Christmas short story market for too long and he's so bloody depressing... wouldn't you rather read something that was funny, had comedy misunderstandings, people accidentally getting engaged and generally was a lot more entertaining and less depressing? Then you're in luck...
Let's be honest, Christmas can be a pain in the arse (or a pain in the 'ass' if you're from the other side of the pond) and this collection features some stories that I think we can all relate to...
Whether it's becoming accidentally engaged to your ex when your fiancee is coming home for Christmas...
Or perhaps you're spending Christmas with the in-laws, your wife is stupifyingly drunk and you destroy the presents...
No?
In that case you'll want to see what happens when two master hypnotists clash over an argument concerning a Christmas tree...
All these things and literally two others are dealt with in this collection of Adam Maxwell's Christmas stories.
He has asked me to tell you that he hopes these things don't happen to you this Christmas. And he also hopes they don't happen to him.
The Defective Detective : Murder on the Links (2010)
Murder. Intrigue. Alcohol. Detectives. Clues. Golf. Laxatives. What else do you need?
When a body is discovered on the golf course the identity of the killer seems obvious. The question is can Clint get to the bottom of the mystery before the stag party catches him?
www.feedbooks.com
Food for the mind
‘Yes,’ I wheezed and dragged myself inside after them.
Inside a caught a glimpse of the last few of them heading down the hall towards the dining room and the kitchen. Against the advise of my ever-tightening lungs I followed them.
‘Bok-BWARK! This fridge,’ they boomed. ‘How many eggs does it hold?’
I knew deep down inside that I should tell them the truth but I was relying on the fact that none of the little blighters had opposable thumbs.
‘I dunno,’ I panted. ‘I never really counted. A lot, I know that.’
Their little heads bobbed up and down in happy agreement.
Then there was a scratching at the door. It was the cock.
About The Author
A dam Maxwell was born in 1976 and has written for a plethora of publications including Dave Eggers' McSweeney's . According to his wife he has an 'unhealthy obsession' with Bob Dylan and the Beatles, and manages to be 'increasingly worrying' in a number of other areas. He has a Masters Degree in Creative Writing from Northumbria University, and lives in the wilds of Northumberland. This is his first book.
You can see much, much more of his work at www.adammaxwell.com including stories, tools for writers and an award-winning short story podcast.
D ial M For Monkey was originally published by Tonto Books and is still available to buy in paperback. Should you wish to do so why not check out Tonto's website www.tontobooks.co.uk or head over to your friendly neighbourhood branch of Amazon.
The author would like to take the opportunity to thank John Hardy for the cover design and artwork as well as Robin Brown who came up with the idea in the first place.
This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 2.5 License. To view a copy of this license, visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.5/ or send a letter to Creative Commons, 543 Howard Street, 5th Floor, San Francisco, California, 94105, USA.
From the same author on Feedbooks
The Night Before The Christmas Before I Was Married & other festive tales (2009)
Charles Dickens has dominated the Christmas short story market for too long and he's so bloody depressing... wouldn't you rather read something that was funny, had comedy misunderstandings, people accidentally getting engaged and generally was a lot more entertaining and less depressing? Then you're in luck...
Let's be honest, Christmas can be a pain in the arse (or a pain in the 'ass' if you're from the other side of the pond) and this collection features some stories that I think we can all relate to...
Whether it's becoming accidentally engaged to your ex when your fiancee is coming home for Christmas...
Or perhaps you're spending Christmas with the in-laws, your wife is stupifyingly drunk and you destroy the presents...
No?
In that case you'll want to see what happens when two master hypnotists clash over an argument concerning a Christmas tree...
All these things and literally two others are dealt with in this collection of Adam Maxwell's Christmas stories.
He has asked me to tell you that he hopes these things don't happen to you this Christmas. And he also hopes they don't happen to him.
The Defective Detective : Murder on the Links (2010)
Murder. Intrigue. Alcohol. Detectives. Clues. Golf. Laxatives. What else do you need?
When a body is discovered on the golf course the identity of the killer seems obvious. The question is can Clint get to the bottom of the mystery before the stag party catches him?
www.feedbooks.com
Food for the mind
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