Ever. I lowered my head in my hands. I could barely survive my regular life, and now this was hurled at me. My fingers slid over the smooth paint beneath my skin. This was my future, whether I accepted it or not.
“Fuck,” I muttered under my breath. I was slightly shocked at the word, even as it fell out of my mouth.
A voice spoke behind me. “I’ve never heard you say that before.”
CHAPTER NINE
My fingers darted to my face wiping away the tearstains. He didn’t approach me. He stayed where he was, behind me, in the deepest shadows.
“Collin,” I said quietly, not turning to look at him, knowing he heard me. My sweat-soaked shirt clung to my body. I wanted to throw on my jacket, but the painting was hidden underneath, and I didn’t want to admit that I stole it. From a church. Oh, God. What was I doing?
Before I gave it much thought the hairs on my neck prickled. My stomach churned in response, feeling like I ate a glass sandwich. Something felt off . Turning, my eyes cut through the darkness, looking to see what was unsettling me. It was Collin. The shadows couldn’t hide the anxiety in his body. His stance was rigid, his tension echoing my own. His arms were folded over his chest, as his muscles flexed, pulling his arms tightly into his body. His hair swept across his eyes, and appeared to be damp, like mine . Did he run here? I watched his chest rise and fall slowly, as he drew in long breaths. It was only Collin.
I dismissed the feeling, thinking my brain was fried, and too paranoid to distinguish danger from craziness. I wasn’t going to throw all my friends away because of Jake. The betrayal stung, but I wouldn’t let it make me afraid of everyone. And this was typical, mysterious Collin. Showing up when I was a wreck, like he always did.
Breaking our gaze, I turned my face down, and stared at the floor. And just in time, too. The tears welled up in my eyes and overflowed. I hated crying in front of people, but after everything I’d been through, my brain finally caught up with my heart. Betrayal, fear, lust, love, and anger all swirled bitterly together.
I didn’t hear him approach. Collin sat down beside me, not saying a word until the tears slowed. Eventually, he reached into his pocket and held out his hand over my lap. As I looked up at him, he opened his palm. A silver-colored ring with a blood-red stone gleamed at me. He pressed it into my hand.
“What’s this?” I sniffled.
“ Your present.” Before I could protest he said, “I’m not taking it back. I got it for you. I thought you could use it today. It’s a ruby in white gold. I heard that it’s supposed to purge the sorrow from your soul. Maybe it’s an old wives tale, but all the same, I thought you could use it today.” He smiled weakly at me, knowing he was treading in dangerous territory.
I slid the ring onto my index finger and looked at it wondering if he just made that up. “I don’t feel any different.”
He smiled, “Maybe it takes longer than two seconds.” He scooted closer. Aware of his proximity and my sweat-coated body, I felt awkward. It should have made me feel better that his skin was dewy too, but he smelled good, and I reeked. I stood up, and held out the ring in the moonlight. Could rubies really absorb sorrow? My hand touched Apryl’s pendant without thinking. If it could, even a little bit, I’d wear it.
I turned expecting to find Collin on the floor, but he stood behind me. Misjudging the distance between us, I aligned my body too close to his. I sucked in a deep breath, startled. When I looked up, we were nose to nose, almost touching, but neither of us moved. We stayed there, gazes locked. Something stirred inside of me. The sensation made my arms feel light, like they could float up to drape around Collin’s neck on their own. Wrapping my fingers in his soft hair would be so easy, but my arms remained at my sides.
A dull image washed through my mind. It felt like an old memory, dull
“Fuck,” I muttered under my breath. I was slightly shocked at the word, even as it fell out of my mouth.
A voice spoke behind me. “I’ve never heard you say that before.”
CHAPTER NINE
My fingers darted to my face wiping away the tearstains. He didn’t approach me. He stayed where he was, behind me, in the deepest shadows.
“Collin,” I said quietly, not turning to look at him, knowing he heard me. My sweat-soaked shirt clung to my body. I wanted to throw on my jacket, but the painting was hidden underneath, and I didn’t want to admit that I stole it. From a church. Oh, God. What was I doing?
Before I gave it much thought the hairs on my neck prickled. My stomach churned in response, feeling like I ate a glass sandwich. Something felt off . Turning, my eyes cut through the darkness, looking to see what was unsettling me. It was Collin. The shadows couldn’t hide the anxiety in his body. His stance was rigid, his tension echoing my own. His arms were folded over his chest, as his muscles flexed, pulling his arms tightly into his body. His hair swept across his eyes, and appeared to be damp, like mine . Did he run here? I watched his chest rise and fall slowly, as he drew in long breaths. It was only Collin.
I dismissed the feeling, thinking my brain was fried, and too paranoid to distinguish danger from craziness. I wasn’t going to throw all my friends away because of Jake. The betrayal stung, but I wouldn’t let it make me afraid of everyone. And this was typical, mysterious Collin. Showing up when I was a wreck, like he always did.
Breaking our gaze, I turned my face down, and stared at the floor. And just in time, too. The tears welled up in my eyes and overflowed. I hated crying in front of people, but after everything I’d been through, my brain finally caught up with my heart. Betrayal, fear, lust, love, and anger all swirled bitterly together.
I didn’t hear him approach. Collin sat down beside me, not saying a word until the tears slowed. Eventually, he reached into his pocket and held out his hand over my lap. As I looked up at him, he opened his palm. A silver-colored ring with a blood-red stone gleamed at me. He pressed it into my hand.
“What’s this?” I sniffled.
“ Your present.” Before I could protest he said, “I’m not taking it back. I got it for you. I thought you could use it today. It’s a ruby in white gold. I heard that it’s supposed to purge the sorrow from your soul. Maybe it’s an old wives tale, but all the same, I thought you could use it today.” He smiled weakly at me, knowing he was treading in dangerous territory.
I slid the ring onto my index finger and looked at it wondering if he just made that up. “I don’t feel any different.”
He smiled, “Maybe it takes longer than two seconds.” He scooted closer. Aware of his proximity and my sweat-coated body, I felt awkward. It should have made me feel better that his skin was dewy too, but he smelled good, and I reeked. I stood up, and held out the ring in the moonlight. Could rubies really absorb sorrow? My hand touched Apryl’s pendant without thinking. If it could, even a little bit, I’d wear it.
I turned expecting to find Collin on the floor, but he stood behind me. Misjudging the distance between us, I aligned my body too close to his. I sucked in a deep breath, startled. When I looked up, we were nose to nose, almost touching, but neither of us moved. We stayed there, gazes locked. Something stirred inside of me. The sensation made my arms feel light, like they could float up to drape around Collin’s neck on their own. Wrapping my fingers in his soft hair would be so easy, but my arms remained at my sides.
A dull image washed through my mind. It felt like an old memory, dull
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