Read Online Deja Vu by Michal Hartstein - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Michal Hartstein
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know they contribute less?”
“Believe me, I know,” I said flatly. “This guy I'm talking about works fewer hours than me. He’s also less qualified, and yet he earns more.”
“How old is he? Maybe he's been working there for many years?”
“He isn’t much older than me, and he’s only been working for Smart Green for six years.”
“Only?” Amir chuckled. “He’s been working there five years longer than you. That's a lot!”
“Don’t forget I was buried for four years in that accounting firm. In terms of job seniority, we have almost the same experience.”
“So how do you explain it?”
“That's what I keep on telling you. There’s no justice! If you enter the boss’s office, bang your fist on the table and threaten to leave, you get what you ask for. If you just keep quiet and accept reality as it is, you just go on getting screwed over.”
“So go into Gideon’s office and bang your fist on his table!”
“And if he fires me?”
“He could’ve fired the engineer. If he doesn’t want you to go, he won’t fire you.”
I was afraid to go to Gideon. I didn’t know what I could say to him. I’d barely been working there a year, and the first salary adjustment for workers in the company happened only after two years, certainly not less than eighteen months. I knew I wasn’t going to wait another whole year, but half a year of waiting seemed like an eternity too.
When I started working on payroll, it never occurred to me it would entail such emotional difficulty. I didn’t see workers; I saw numbers. I could rate all the workers from the most expensive to the least expensive, just like grades pinned on the bulletin board in the principal’s office. Next to each name was a number. The higher the number, the more that person was to be respected. That analogy between pay scales and school grades ran through my mind again and again. During my studies at university, my ranking gave me confidence. I wasn’t always in first place, but I always knew that the list was realistic. The best student received the highest score. The employee list was very different. Those who received the highest salary weren’t necessarily the best employees, at least not in my opinion, and it bothered me. It was more than just the financial reward. The payroll was a simplistic way for me to rate the company's employees.
I didn’t like my position. I thought I deserved to be ranked higher.
A year and two months after I started working at Smart Green, I knew I couldn’t continue with the way things were. I decided to go to Gideon, even though my contract stated clearly that I wouldn’t be considered for a raise until I’d worked there for two years.
I decided to take a chance.
I entered Gideon’s office after practicing my speech for a week. He smiled at me and asked what I wanted.
“I want to talk about something personal,” I said.
“Please,” he gestured to the chair opposite him. “Come and sit down.”
I had a feeling he thought I was going to tell him I was pregnant.
“I'm not pregnant,” I blurted out immediately. “At least, not as far as I know,” I smiled.
“That's fine,” he said with a look of appreciation. “You know that Smart Green respects mothers. You must have heard that Deganit, who works with you, returned from a nine-month maternity leave just before you started your job.”
“Yes, I heard.”
“But you're not pregnant, so what did you want to tell me?”
“Gideon,” I cleared my throat. I didn’t want my voice to tremble. I wanted to sound as assertive as I could. “I think you know how much I enjoy working for this company.” He nodded. “This job is everything I dreamed of and more. I'm learning a lot and enjoy helping in any way that my training and experience allows.”
“I'm very pleased with you too,” he said immediately. I knew he was very pleased with me. He never hid it and made sure to praise me with compliments and
“Believe me, I know,” I said flatly. “This guy I'm talking about works fewer hours than me. He’s also less qualified, and yet he earns more.”
“How old is he? Maybe he's been working there for many years?”
“He isn’t much older than me, and he’s only been working for Smart Green for six years.”
“Only?” Amir chuckled. “He’s been working there five years longer than you. That's a lot!”
“Don’t forget I was buried for four years in that accounting firm. In terms of job seniority, we have almost the same experience.”
“So how do you explain it?”
“That's what I keep on telling you. There’s no justice! If you enter the boss’s office, bang your fist on the table and threaten to leave, you get what you ask for. If you just keep quiet and accept reality as it is, you just go on getting screwed over.”
“So go into Gideon’s office and bang your fist on his table!”
“And if he fires me?”
“He could’ve fired the engineer. If he doesn’t want you to go, he won’t fire you.”
I was afraid to go to Gideon. I didn’t know what I could say to him. I’d barely been working there a year, and the first salary adjustment for workers in the company happened only after two years, certainly not less than eighteen months. I knew I wasn’t going to wait another whole year, but half a year of waiting seemed like an eternity too.
When I started working on payroll, it never occurred to me it would entail such emotional difficulty. I didn’t see workers; I saw numbers. I could rate all the workers from the most expensive to the least expensive, just like grades pinned on the bulletin board in the principal’s office. Next to each name was a number. The higher the number, the more that person was to be respected. That analogy between pay scales and school grades ran through my mind again and again. During my studies at university, my ranking gave me confidence. I wasn’t always in first place, but I always knew that the list was realistic. The best student received the highest score. The employee list was very different. Those who received the highest salary weren’t necessarily the best employees, at least not in my opinion, and it bothered me. It was more than just the financial reward. The payroll was a simplistic way for me to rate the company's employees.
I didn’t like my position. I thought I deserved to be ranked higher.
A year and two months after I started working at Smart Green, I knew I couldn’t continue with the way things were. I decided to go to Gideon, even though my contract stated clearly that I wouldn’t be considered for a raise until I’d worked there for two years.
I decided to take a chance.
I entered Gideon’s office after practicing my speech for a week. He smiled at me and asked what I wanted.
“I want to talk about something personal,” I said.
“Please,” he gestured to the chair opposite him. “Come and sit down.”
I had a feeling he thought I was going to tell him I was pregnant.
“I'm not pregnant,” I blurted out immediately. “At least, not as far as I know,” I smiled.
“That's fine,” he said with a look of appreciation. “You know that Smart Green respects mothers. You must have heard that Deganit, who works with you, returned from a nine-month maternity leave just before you started your job.”
“Yes, I heard.”
“But you're not pregnant, so what did you want to tell me?”
“Gideon,” I cleared my throat. I didn’t want my voice to tremble. I wanted to sound as assertive as I could. “I think you know how much I enjoy working for this company.” He nodded. “This job is everything I dreamed of and more. I'm learning a lot and enjoy helping in any way that my training and experience allows.”
“I'm very pleased with you too,” he said immediately. I knew he was very pleased with me. He never hid it and made sure to praise me with compliments and