mathematically all the odds possible in poker, among many other things. Once he listed all his doctors; once, fascinated like most children by the mysterious entity of the family, he drew up his family tree with great elaborateness. One morning in New York I got this letter:
Saturday
D EAR P AP ,
Here is the list of chemicals:
1 lb. acetone
4 oz. Ammonium Chloride
1 oz. Sodium hydride
U-tube (with arms)
2 ft. thick-walled rubber tubing to fit arms U-tube
2 rubber stoppers to fit U-tube
2 ft. glass tubing to fit inside rubber tubing.
1-hole rubber stopper into which glass tubing will fit.
Any test-tube into which stopper will fit.
love,
J OHNNY
I scurried around to pick up all this and in addition to find a cargo of dry ice he needed. What shame I feel now that I had never taken this request for dry ice seriously enough! He had asked me for it several times, but there seemed to be more important things to worry about, and I had neglected to bring it. Johnny repeated his request—gentle soul!—but never loudly enough to embarrass me. Finally I brought it. This dry ice (enough to fill a bucket) was of the utmost importance. With it he was going to perform an experiment he had been working on, in theory, all summer—the liquefaction of ammonia by a quite new process.
One of Johnny’s great friends, and a cardinal influence in his life, was his neighbor Mr. Weaver, who taught chemistry at Andover. For summer after summer, this good and generous man had been Johnny’s best adult friend. Mr. Weaver came over and helped him when his own weakened hands and failing co-ordination were not quite up to the mechanical tasks involved. Johnny insulated a big can with rock wool and pumped the gas as he made it through another receptacle filled with the dry ice. The experiment worked, praise be. Never before had ammonia been liquefied in this precise way. Johnny had truly invented something. His pride and happiness knew no bounds—though he scoffed modestly at what he had done.
Frances wrote: “A leaf in the solution freezes stiff, then breaks at the blow of a knife with an icy clink. Ï triumph! His dark blue eyes shone with joy.” That evening when he kissed her good night he exclaimed, “It’s been another fine day, Mother!”
There were preciously grasped delights that summer. Once Frances found him late at night intently rearranging his rocks in accurate geological classification. Once she had a party, with the ladies in long dresses and their hair up, and Johnny helped serve the food like a serious, conscientious host. He read Christopher Morley’s “O n Unanswering Letters” with delight, and one evening I read aloud a Ring Lardner story about a caddie and he laughed till the tears came. Once I gave him a ten-dollar bill and he asked Frances, “Where shall I hide it?” She replied, “In the only place possible—in bed.” Johnny: “What a woman!”
Once we celebrated a release from hospital by giving him a spoonful of champagne. He had another spoonful and then announced, “Let’s have a little more formality around here. I’m going to call you Mother and Father from now on, instead of Mutti and Papa.”
Once Mr. Boyden and Mr. Hayden, one of his favorite teachers, drove down from Deerfield to have a day with him. This was a red-letter occasion indeed, and Johnny talked to them soberly about school the next term. Of course it had occurred to him by this time that he might be unable to get back to school, but the idea was so unthinkable that for the most part he suppressed it. Mr. Boyden’s visit was a great turning point in restoring hope. Johnny explained to him how he intended to make up the time he had lost, and then registered frankly all the complaints he had previously made to us. Later he amplified his views. “It’s not that I’m complaining; I was just giving an explanation of why I don’t get better marks.” Still later: “You know, Mr. Boyden is the most persuasive man
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