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Authors: Larry Correia, Mike Kupari
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know who hangs out here.” Everyone knew Zubara was a safe haven for various terrorist organizations. Diplomatically, the government was friendly to the US, and tolerated the Israelis, but the official government was growing weaker by the day. “Maybe you talk, and I end up on an Al Jazeera video getting my head sawed off?” I had robbed, conned, or defrauded every major criminal organization on earth at some point. It had made me both a lot of money and a lot of enemies. “We both know that won’t happen, because you know I’d find a way to take you with me, and besides, I pay way better than those cheap bastards.” I gestured toward the envelope. “That’s the first installment. I’ll pay you double what I paid you in Dubai.”
“It was only a hypothetical.”
“And just so you know, I’m doing this job for Big Eddie. So if you hypothetically cross me, you hypothetically cross him, which means that he’ll track you down to the ends of the earth and hypothetically feed your entire family into a wood chipper.”
His eyes grew wide as he processed that information. Regardless of who you were in the criminal underworld, you were afraid of Eddie. He was evil incarnate. It was my ultimate trump card, because no one on Eddie’s naughty list lived for long. Jalal’s demeanor changed and he gave me a big smile, always the businessman. “Of course, my friend. How can I be of service?”
Jalal Hosani was a facilitator, not a man who got his hands dirty. He knewpeople. When you are operating in a new area, you had to have intelligence, and that meant knowing the right people. Jalal knew the right people. Of course, he would also sell me out as soon as it benefited him. So I had to make sure that the math stayed in my favor, because I actually kind of liked Jalal, snake that he was, and killing him would make me . . . sad. Sort of.
“Later on I’m going to need a source for equipment, weapons, vehicles. Usual stuff, but right now I need information. I need to know what’s really going down in Zubara.”
“The emir is having a battle against one of his generals for control of the government,” Jalal said as if this were common knowledge. “The pro-Western factions are siding with the emir, the fundamentalists and Iranian puppets are siding with the general. It hasn’t become violent yet, but it is only a matter of time.”
I nodded. “I know that much. What I need to know is who all the players are, and then I’m going to have you do a few introductions for me. Which side are you on?”
“General Al Sabah is a very dangerous man, but the emir should not be underestimated.” My old acquaintance appeared to give it some thought. “I suppose I will wait and see which side wins. That is always the side to be on.”
“I killed a guy named Al Sabah once.”
“It is a common name.” Jalal shrugged. “Either way, most of the army is loyal to the general and his personal guard is growing with many foreign”—he paused, looking for the right word— “volunteers.”
“You mean fundamentalist nut-jobs who got tired of getting their asses kicked up north decided to get a different job where they could still sock it to the Great Satan?”
“Something like that. Now let us get down to business.” We spoke for another half an hour, during which he provided me with the low down on the various players in this unfolding drama. I was careful to give him no information about what I was actually doing here. I asked random questions about unrelated things, to cloud the issue just in case he was planning on betraying me. The meeting was beneficial, and I learned quite a bit more about the inner workings of Zubaran politics. Finally we were done, and Jalal, late for his next appointment, excused himself. We would be in touch.
I leaned back in my chair and watched him leave. The power struggle complicated things. Politics in this part of the world was like a high-speed chess game where the losers got put in
“It was only a hypothetical.”
“And just so you know, I’m doing this job for Big Eddie. So if you hypothetically cross me, you hypothetically cross him, which means that he’ll track you down to the ends of the earth and hypothetically feed your entire family into a wood chipper.”
His eyes grew wide as he processed that information. Regardless of who you were in the criminal underworld, you were afraid of Eddie. He was evil incarnate. It was my ultimate trump card, because no one on Eddie’s naughty list lived for long. Jalal’s demeanor changed and he gave me a big smile, always the businessman. “Of course, my friend. How can I be of service?”
Jalal Hosani was a facilitator, not a man who got his hands dirty. He knewpeople. When you are operating in a new area, you had to have intelligence, and that meant knowing the right people. Jalal knew the right people. Of course, he would also sell me out as soon as it benefited him. So I had to make sure that the math stayed in my favor, because I actually kind of liked Jalal, snake that he was, and killing him would make me . . . sad. Sort of.
“Later on I’m going to need a source for equipment, weapons, vehicles. Usual stuff, but right now I need information. I need to know what’s really going down in Zubara.”
“The emir is having a battle against one of his generals for control of the government,” Jalal said as if this were common knowledge. “The pro-Western factions are siding with the emir, the fundamentalists and Iranian puppets are siding with the general. It hasn’t become violent yet, but it is only a matter of time.”
I nodded. “I know that much. What I need to know is who all the players are, and then I’m going to have you do a few introductions for me. Which side are you on?”
“General Al Sabah is a very dangerous man, but the emir should not be underestimated.” My old acquaintance appeared to give it some thought. “I suppose I will wait and see which side wins. That is always the side to be on.”
“I killed a guy named Al Sabah once.”
“It is a common name.” Jalal shrugged. “Either way, most of the army is loyal to the general and his personal guard is growing with many foreign”—he paused, looking for the right word— “volunteers.”
“You mean fundamentalist nut-jobs who got tired of getting their asses kicked up north decided to get a different job where they could still sock it to the Great Satan?”
“Something like that. Now let us get down to business.” We spoke for another half an hour, during which he provided me with the low down on the various players in this unfolding drama. I was careful to give him no information about what I was actually doing here. I asked random questions about unrelated things, to cloud the issue just in case he was planning on betraying me. The meeting was beneficial, and I learned quite a bit more about the inner workings of Zubaran politics. Finally we were done, and Jalal, late for his next appointment, excused himself. We would be in touch.
I leaned back in my chair and watched him leave. The power struggle complicated things. Politics in this part of the world was like a high-speed chess game where the losers got put in
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