Read Online Damaged: A Violated Trust (Secrets) by Melody Carlson - Free Book Online Page B

just need to remember to use it, draw the line, assert myself. Even if you love someone, you don’t have to let them push you around.
    I’m sure I’ll eventually need to figure out a way to let Harris know I’m not ready for sex. Although I’m surprised I’m partly questioning my abstinence pledge now — a part of me wonders … I mean, if I’m in a committed and loving relationship (kind of like Dad and Estelle), then is it okay?
    Yet at the same time, another part of me firmly says no, do not compromise, do not give in — stick to your guns and wait until your wedding day. Because the truth is, as great as Harris makes me feel, the idea of going all the way scares me a lot. I would have no idea what to expect, what to do, how to handle any of that. Seriously, I know I’m not ready for sex. At least not yet.
    Besides, I’ve heard stories of girls who have sex with their boyfriends and the next thing they know, the guy breaks up with them. If for no other reason that that, I decide it’s better to abstain from sex and continue this relationship, even if it feels like I have to string him along a little. In time he’ll get it, and if he loves me like I love him, he’ll respect me even more for my decision. It makes perfect sense to me. Now if I could just figure out what to wear tonight.
    I go through my closet and try on several outfits, but nothing seems perfect for my first date with Harris. Then again, this isn’t really my first date with Harris. Last night, even though impromptu, was a date. After all, we went out in his car together, ate a meal together, kissed afterward, and he brought me home. That means it was our first date. So this is actually my second date with Harris! So, really, I should relax a little.
    Finally I decide to go with a flouncy little skirt Estelle said looked great with my legs. I top this with a figure-fitting light green top I got at the Gap, add some hoop earrings and my favorite sandals, and I feel pretty good. I check myself in the mirror. I look pretty hot too. This is going to be a fun evening, I just know it!
    “You clean up good,” I tell Harris when he picks me up.
    He lets out a low appreciative whistle. “So do you, Haley.”
    Then we kiss, and tingles run relays up and down my spine. “And tonight I’m starving.”
    “Good.” He opens the front door. “So am I.”
    I pause to lock the door, vaguely wondering when Dad will get back. It doesn’t really matter. Harris links arms with me, and as we walk to his car, I feel so happy that I wonder if I could actually burst with happiness. No wonder people are so into love — who knew it could make you feel so good?

...[CHAPTER 8].................
     
    I honestly don’t think it will matter where Harris takes me tonight. A taco stand or McDonald’s or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in his car would be just fine — as long as we are together. Plus, with so many butterflies in my stomach, I wonder if I can even eat at all. Even if this is my second date, it feels like a first and I’m so nervous I feel giddy. I hope I don’t say anything too stupid.
    “If we do something quick for dinner, there’s a movie we can catch at seven thirty.” Harris starts his car. “That is, if you like action flicks. Do you?”
    “Sure,” I tell him. Okay, that’s not exactly honest. In fact, it’s a great big lie. But I feel like I can make it true. Because if I’m watching an action movie with Harris, I will love it. I know I will.
    “Great. I’ve really wanted to see it. A lot of girls aren’t into that kind of thing, but I had a feeling you’d be more open-minded.”
    “I try to be open-minded. I really don’t like being around people with closed minds. It seems to lead directly to bigotry and smallness.”
    He nods, then points toward the strip where several fast-food restaurants are located. “You have any preferences?”
    “What’s your favorite?”
    He shrugs. “I kinda like the fish and chips place, but