Read Online Dallas (Time for Tammy #1) by Kit Sergeant - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Kit Sergeant
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throwing stuffed animals at people in the hallway. Once, my friend Bill and I took out all the little screws on the power outlet covers. We did the whole school.”
“What happened?” I asked.
“Nothing much. They replaced them all by Monday morning.” He paused for a minute while Jane and I contemplated this feat.
“So I played basketball,” he continued. “To try to get some real play”—with girls, not with basketballs, I assumed. “But the only girl I ever won over was a Japanese exchange student. She kind of stalked me for a while. She went to all of my games, even the away ones, and sat in the front row. Then she’d shout ‘Sroot the free, Dallas. Sroot the free!’”
“Sroot the what?” Jane asked meanly, as I asked, “Why did she want you to shoot a tree?”
“No, free. Sroot the free. Like shoot the three-pointer.”
“Oh, right. Of course. Sroot the free.”
“I have to start pranking more,” I told Jane on our way back from the cafeteria, unfortunately unaccompanied by Dallas.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, that’s what’s he’s into. I should do more—that way we can have something to talk about.”
Jane didn’t reply right away. I looked up to see my old roommate LaVerne heading toward us, holding hands with Eric. Jane and I walked on opposite edges of the sidewalk as the two passed in between us without a word.
“I’ve got an idea,” Jane finally said, pulling my arm as she veered off the pathway back to Alpha.
“Where are you going?” The only building in the direction she was headed was the Health Center. I followed her.
“Oh good they’re still open,” she said when we arrived. She yanked open the glass door and went inside.
“Can I help you?” the student receptionist asked.
Jane looked around the reception room in lieu of a reply. “Ah,” she said, walking over to the table of condoms. “No thanks. We just need a few of these.” She grabbed a handful. “You know, for protection.” She gave me a look , so I also grabbed a handful.
“Enjoy!” the receptionist called as we left.
“What the hell do we need those for?” I asked Jane as soon as we left the building. I didn’t have a purse or any other place to put them so I split my pile up between each hand and tried to cover them with my fist.
“You’ll see.”
When Jane and I got back to my room, we dumped the condoms on my desk. Linda glanced down at the pile and then at me. I shrugged.
I was reading up on marine acornworms a few hours later when I began to smell the most atrocious scent. It was a cross between a really ripe fart and socks that had been worn for a week straight. It was worse than when my mom’s Shih-tzu ate the wrong dog food—Pookie could clear the room, but at least it was only temporary. This one lingered. I sniffed and glanced over at the door. Because our new room was across from the bathroom, I wondered if perhaps one of my fellow virgin dormmates had to go Number Two bad enough to stink up the hall and resounding rooms. But our door remained shut tight. I glanced at Linda wondering if she could have perhaps been the source of the smell. Her head was bent over a book. A smell that bad couldn’t possibly be emanating from Linda. I gazed around the room, wondering if perhaps Linda was sorting her laundry and forgot to put it back in her closet. There were a few small items on the floor but nothing that would account for the pungent odor. And anyway, Linda would have had to soak her clothes in methane for them to smell like that.I flipped backwards in my textbook as I realized I had read almost an entire chapter on Hemichordates, but had absorbed nothing. With a sigh, I slammed the book shut.
Linda glanced over at me. “Everything OK?”
“Yeah. Going to take a bathroom break,” I told her. I had to escape that smell.
“Good luck,” she told me cryptically.
But the stench smelled as equally bad in the hallway. I kicked open the revolving bathroom door,
“What happened?” I asked.
“Nothing much. They replaced them all by Monday morning.” He paused for a minute while Jane and I contemplated this feat.
“So I played basketball,” he continued. “To try to get some real play”—with girls, not with basketballs, I assumed. “But the only girl I ever won over was a Japanese exchange student. She kind of stalked me for a while. She went to all of my games, even the away ones, and sat in the front row. Then she’d shout ‘Sroot the free, Dallas. Sroot the free!’”
“Sroot the what?” Jane asked meanly, as I asked, “Why did she want you to shoot a tree?”
“No, free. Sroot the free. Like shoot the three-pointer.”
“Oh, right. Of course. Sroot the free.”
“I have to start pranking more,” I told Jane on our way back from the cafeteria, unfortunately unaccompanied by Dallas.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, that’s what’s he’s into. I should do more—that way we can have something to talk about.”
Jane didn’t reply right away. I looked up to see my old roommate LaVerne heading toward us, holding hands with Eric. Jane and I walked on opposite edges of the sidewalk as the two passed in between us without a word.
“I’ve got an idea,” Jane finally said, pulling my arm as she veered off the pathway back to Alpha.
“Where are you going?” The only building in the direction she was headed was the Health Center. I followed her.
“Oh good they’re still open,” she said when we arrived. She yanked open the glass door and went inside.
“Can I help you?” the student receptionist asked.
Jane looked around the reception room in lieu of a reply. “Ah,” she said, walking over to the table of condoms. “No thanks. We just need a few of these.” She grabbed a handful. “You know, for protection.” She gave me a look , so I also grabbed a handful.
“Enjoy!” the receptionist called as we left.
“What the hell do we need those for?” I asked Jane as soon as we left the building. I didn’t have a purse or any other place to put them so I split my pile up between each hand and tried to cover them with my fist.
“You’ll see.”
When Jane and I got back to my room, we dumped the condoms on my desk. Linda glanced down at the pile and then at me. I shrugged.
I was reading up on marine acornworms a few hours later when I began to smell the most atrocious scent. It was a cross between a really ripe fart and socks that had been worn for a week straight. It was worse than when my mom’s Shih-tzu ate the wrong dog food—Pookie could clear the room, but at least it was only temporary. This one lingered. I sniffed and glanced over at the door. Because our new room was across from the bathroom, I wondered if perhaps one of my fellow virgin dormmates had to go Number Two bad enough to stink up the hall and resounding rooms. But our door remained shut tight. I glanced at Linda wondering if she could have perhaps been the source of the smell. Her head was bent over a book. A smell that bad couldn’t possibly be emanating from Linda. I gazed around the room, wondering if perhaps Linda was sorting her laundry and forgot to put it back in her closet. There were a few small items on the floor but nothing that would account for the pungent odor. And anyway, Linda would have had to soak her clothes in methane for them to smell like that.I flipped backwards in my textbook as I realized I had read almost an entire chapter on Hemichordates, but had absorbed nothing. With a sigh, I slammed the book shut.
Linda glanced over at me. “Everything OK?”
“Yeah. Going to take a bathroom break,” I told her. I had to escape that smell.
“Good luck,” she told me cryptically.
But the stench smelled as equally bad in the hallway. I kicked open the revolving bathroom door,
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