Read Online Country Pursuits by Jo Carnegie - Free Book Online Page B

Camilla ran to open it and was confronted by Angus, dressed in black tie, a Santa Claus hat incongruously perched on his huge head. Flanking him were two equally enormous men. One was dressed in full drag, complete with blonde wig and fishnet stockings, and the other was dressed as a giant fairy with wings, a wand and a pink tutu. They looked like clones of Angus, with their big meaty bodies and ruddy red cheeks, except the one on the left had a huge, Desperate-Dan-style chin, and the fairy on the right was sporting an inane, gap-toothed smile. Camilla’s heart sank.
    â€˜Hello, you foxy filly!’ boomed Angus, clapping a hand around the men either side of him. ‘You’ve met Sniffer,’ he said, cocking his head to the one dressed in drag. ‘And this is Horse.’ The hulk of a man next to him flashed his gap-toothed smile and curtsied in his tutu.
    â€˜Angus, it’s not fancy dress,’ said Camilla faintly, as they all thundered in, filling the narrow corridor completely.
    â€˜Yah, I know,’ said Angus. ‘But me and the chapsthought it would be jolly good fun; keep you ladies entertained all night!’
    â€˜If you know what we mean,’ leered Sniffer, looming over her. Camilla pretended she didn’t, and wondered just what Angus had been saying to his friends about her.
    It was too late to do anything. Camilla stood aside helplessly and watched them barrel into the living room. Cool as a cucumber, Calypso lit her cigarette and looked at them.
    â€˜Didn’t know there was a dress code, lads.’
    â€˜Yah, we decided things needed livening up a bit,’ boomed Sniffer, his eyes travelling up and down her endless legs. He took in the make-up and earrings. ‘Are you a pop star or something?’
    Calypso ignored him and took a drag.
    â€˜So!’ said Camilla brightly. ‘Let me introduce everyone. Caro, this is er, Sniffer and Horse. Guys, this is my sister Caro, and that,’ she indicated Calypso, ‘is our younger sister, Calypso.’
    Horse bared his substantial teeth in what Camilla took to be an inviting smile. ‘Yah, well I can see good looks run in the family. I do have a liking for sisters.’ Sniffer elbowed him conspicuously, and they fell about laughing.
    Camilla ploughed on. ‘This is my best friend, Harriet Fraser.’ All three of them rounded on Harriet, who until that point had been trying to shrink unobtrusively into the armchair in the corner of the room.
    â€˜
Mamma mia!
’ said Sniffer, looking down into the acres of cleavage.
    â€˜You don’t get many of
those
to the pound,’ chortled Horse. Harriet went bright red and put acushion over her chest. Angus, sharply prodded by a furious Camilla, realized his friends might have gone slightly too far. ‘Come on, you two, leave the poor girl alone. What’s a chap got to do for a drink around here, anyway?’
    â€˜So why are you called Horse?’ asked Calypso sarcastically.
    A smug smile spread across Horse’s face and he gestured down to his crotch. ‘Can’t you guess, gorgeous?’
    â€˜Urgh!’
    Sniffer stepped in. ‘Stop lying, Horseman! Your name has got nothing to do with how big your dick is,’ he said. Horse’s red cheeks paled slightly.
    â€˜No?’ asked Calypso, leaning forward and showing her first spark of interest so far. ‘Why’s he really called Horse, then?’
    Angus guffawed. ‘Because he used to have huge front teeth at prep school!’ He turned to Horse. ‘Isn’t that right, you goofy twat?’
    Angus and Sniffer roared with laughter, while Horse looked thoroughly put out. ‘Leave it out, you bastards,’ he said petulantly. ‘I had to wear a brace, so what?’
    His friends roared with laughter again. Just then the doorbell rang. Camilla looked at the clock on the wall; it read 8.08 p.m.
    Calypso’s eyes lit up. ‘Sam!’ she