Read Online Consumed by Wrath: An FBI/Romance Thriller (An FBI/Romance Thriller ~ Book 8) by Morgan Kelley - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Morgan Kelley
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I would have eaten my gun, had I lost you.”
Her words shocked him.
It horrified him.
“Elizabeth,” he began.
“No, shut up, Ethan. You wanted the truth and my real feelings, well here they are. Now, I still feel like I’m losing you. You’re despondent and you just don’t care anymore. How do I put a band aid over that? How do I, the protective raven, fix this? I’m carrying that weight too, and it’s getting heavier each day. You’re not the only one that’s wounded, Ethan. I may be beyond repair too.”
“I need my Lyzee back. I need the woman who laughed and made me smile. I want the woman who was tough as nails and not afraid of anything.”
If he only knew what kind of pressure that put on her, he might not have said it.
“She didn't have to face nearly losing you. That Lyzee never had to face the what if’s , Ethan. She never had to watch you wake up, afraid and broken in that hospital room, and afraid of the dark. It’s hard to be so damn tough when your heart is in fucking pieces. Before you were taken, I was invincible, or I thought I was. Now, I know the truth. There is one hell of a big chink in my armor, and it’s you.”
“Why don’t you touch me anymore?” he asked , suddenly.
She stared at him like he was crazy. “I touch you all the time. In fact, I just hugged you a couple of hours ago and was holding your hand.”
Ethan pointed to the side of the road. “Please pull over.”
Elizabeth did what he asked, and turned towards him.
When Ethan hit the dome light in the Navigator, his face, and anguish, were clearly visible. The demons were chasing him, and he needed an escape route.
“When you run your fingers through my hair, you hesitate. I can feel it. It’s the same thing for my tattoo. You used to love the raven, and now when you look at it, you get a weird look in your eyes. Are you still in love with me, Elizabeth? I need to know so I can decide how to move on with my life. If you don’t want me anymore, just say it. If you’re going to discard me, let me know so I can brace for it.”
God, he hoped that wasn’t it. To hear those words would drive a stake through his already damaged heart. If he lost her, Ethan was a goner.
Elizabeth wanted to be physically sick. “Am I still in love with you? I’ve never loved you more, Ethan. You’re probably the one person on this entire planet that I cherish most. Yeah, I love you and Callen the same, but I found you first. You were my first love, and you don’t forget that, ever. I hesitate before touching you because I’m afraid to put my hands on you.”
He stared at her, trying to understand her words.
When she didn't add more to the conversation, he went with the drastic. Ethan ripped open his shirt to show her the tattoo. “Look at it Elizabeth. It’s not the same. It never will be. Can you live with that?”
She stared at the magnificent bird that was inked onto his flesh. When they first met, she had fallen in love with it. Now, there were scars crisscrossing it, forming a pentagram. With her fingers, she gently ran them over the bird, not the ravaged markings made by a mad man.
“I still love it, Ethan. It’s still us. If anything, it’s more perfect now than before. I just don’t know how to make you see that. You’re too lost in the grief and mourning. I’m afraid to touch you and remind you of what happened. I always think that if I run my hands over your body, especially the tattoos, you’ll think about what he did to you. I hate bringing you pain. I hate that what was once us, is now a bad memory.”
He watched her with emotion filled eyes, as her fingertips lightly caressed the wings and even the scars he’d been forced to endure. It never occurred to him that even then, she was trying to protect him, sacrificing what was her instinct.
“When we met, it was unmarred, but like everyone else in life, we pick up blemishes with age. I’m not the same as I was almost four years ago. I’m older.
Her words shocked him.
It horrified him.
“Elizabeth,” he began.
“No, shut up, Ethan. You wanted the truth and my real feelings, well here they are. Now, I still feel like I’m losing you. You’re despondent and you just don’t care anymore. How do I put a band aid over that? How do I, the protective raven, fix this? I’m carrying that weight too, and it’s getting heavier each day. You’re not the only one that’s wounded, Ethan. I may be beyond repair too.”
“I need my Lyzee back. I need the woman who laughed and made me smile. I want the woman who was tough as nails and not afraid of anything.”
If he only knew what kind of pressure that put on her, he might not have said it.
“She didn't have to face nearly losing you. That Lyzee never had to face the what if’s , Ethan. She never had to watch you wake up, afraid and broken in that hospital room, and afraid of the dark. It’s hard to be so damn tough when your heart is in fucking pieces. Before you were taken, I was invincible, or I thought I was. Now, I know the truth. There is one hell of a big chink in my armor, and it’s you.”
“Why don’t you touch me anymore?” he asked , suddenly.
She stared at him like he was crazy. “I touch you all the time. In fact, I just hugged you a couple of hours ago and was holding your hand.”
Ethan pointed to the side of the road. “Please pull over.”
Elizabeth did what he asked, and turned towards him.
When Ethan hit the dome light in the Navigator, his face, and anguish, were clearly visible. The demons were chasing him, and he needed an escape route.
“When you run your fingers through my hair, you hesitate. I can feel it. It’s the same thing for my tattoo. You used to love the raven, and now when you look at it, you get a weird look in your eyes. Are you still in love with me, Elizabeth? I need to know so I can decide how to move on with my life. If you don’t want me anymore, just say it. If you’re going to discard me, let me know so I can brace for it.”
God, he hoped that wasn’t it. To hear those words would drive a stake through his already damaged heart. If he lost her, Ethan was a goner.
Elizabeth wanted to be physically sick. “Am I still in love with you? I’ve never loved you more, Ethan. You’re probably the one person on this entire planet that I cherish most. Yeah, I love you and Callen the same, but I found you first. You were my first love, and you don’t forget that, ever. I hesitate before touching you because I’m afraid to put my hands on you.”
He stared at her, trying to understand her words.
When she didn't add more to the conversation, he went with the drastic. Ethan ripped open his shirt to show her the tattoo. “Look at it Elizabeth. It’s not the same. It never will be. Can you live with that?”
She stared at the magnificent bird that was inked onto his flesh. When they first met, she had fallen in love with it. Now, there were scars crisscrossing it, forming a pentagram. With her fingers, she gently ran them over the bird, not the ravaged markings made by a mad man.
“I still love it, Ethan. It’s still us. If anything, it’s more perfect now than before. I just don’t know how to make you see that. You’re too lost in the grief and mourning. I’m afraid to touch you and remind you of what happened. I always think that if I run my hands over your body, especially the tattoos, you’ll think about what he did to you. I hate bringing you pain. I hate that what was once us, is now a bad memory.”
He watched her with emotion filled eyes, as her fingertips lightly caressed the wings and even the scars he’d been forced to endure. It never occurred to him that even then, she was trying to protect him, sacrificing what was her instinct.
“When we met, it was unmarred, but like everyone else in life, we pick up blemishes with age. I’m not the same as I was almost four years ago. I’m older.
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