figure that?”
I petted his hand. “Because you’re a good person and I would ruin you.”
“Why would you ruin me?”
“I ruin everyone, Roy. I’m a disease.”
“Don’t say that.”
I shrugged. “Why not? It’s true.”
“According to who? Your sister?”
“Por favor, señor, ¿ha visto a mi hijo?”
I pressed my fingers against the pain stabbing my temple.
“Are you okay?”
“Fine.”
“Me llamo …”
Roy made me look at him. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing?”
“You’re pale.”
I laughed and pulled away. “Lots of time indoors will do that.” The spoon tumbled from my hand.
Roy went to turn up the heat.
“I said I’m fine.”
“You’re shivering.”
“A drink would be far more effective than heat.”
“Please eat.” He sat.
I ate a few bites of soup, hoping he’d quit staring at me. He didn’t until half the bowl was empty.
Roy went to the kitchen and came back with a glass of orange juice.
“You forgot the vodka.”
“I’m all out.”
The juice tasted weird without the alcohol. “See, you’re so wholesome you don’t even keep booze in the place.”
He finished pouring himself a glass. Roy capped the jug and stood there rubbing the scar on the back of his hand. “My cellmate tried to get a little too friendly and didn’t want to take no for an answer. Neither did the guy in the shower. Or the meal hall. After that, I wasn’t very popular. I learned really fast it was better when people were afraid of you.”
“You went to jail?”
“Prison.” He took the OJ back to the fridge.
“There’s a difference?”
“County and Federal. So yeah, here’s a big difference.”
People like Roy didn’t do things bad enough to wind up behind bars. It was impossible.
“Why were you in prison?”
He stayed on the other side of the counter. “I killed a man.” For a moment, I thought I saw tears in his eyes, but it disappeared behind the glass he drank from.
“What happened?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yes.” Because there had to be a very good reason for someone like him to hurt anyone.
He put the empty glass in the sink. “I was in a bar fight, and a man died.”
“And the reason for the fight?”
“It was just a fight.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“Then we’re even.”
“Even? How.”
“You lied about eating.”
So he did know. “Big difference. Tell me. Please.”
Roy scrubbed his hands over his face, then folded his arms over his chest. He stared with no expression on his face but somehow looked destroyed.
He cleared his throat. “The crowds were really bad on Fridays. Construction workers, truck drivers, guys from the college. It was pretty normal for things to get rowdy. I was in the back by the pool tables with a bunch of other men on my crew.” The tick returned to his jaw.
“Keep going.”
“I really don’t…” He sighed. “Like I said, it was crowded. Some of the other guys got too friendly with this girl, a waitress. At some point, one of them made a pass. She turned him down, and he didn’t want to take no for an answer. By the time I saw what they were doing, they already had her shirt off. There had to be fifteen other men standing around, and none of them did a damn thing to stop it.”
“So you did.”
“What else was I supposed to do?”
“Could have turned your back like everyone else in the bar.”
He dropped his gaze. “I went to break it up, and they came after me.”
“How many were there?”
“Why?”
I shrugged. “Just wanted to know the odds.”
“Five to one.”
“Not a very fair fight.” I sipped my juice while Roy scuffed his feet against the faded linoleum. “And what happened next?”
“After I broke a few noses, they backed off. Except for one. He pulled a knife. He lunged. I grabbed him and snapped his neck. It just happened.”
“Self defense,” I said.
“Yes and no.”
“It was five on one. Not to mention they were trying to rape a woman. Tell me how a jury
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