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Authors: Katie Maxwell
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heavy sword. The
owner of the sword lunged toward him, sending Peter falling over a lawn chair. While the peach-
throwing Viking's attention was focused on Ramon, Tallulah ran to her trailer. But she stopped in the doorway and sent me a look that raised goose bumps on my arms. Although her lips didn't
move, I swear I could hear her voice on the wind saying, "This is your doing. Fix it!"
"Hey!" I bellowed, and threw myself off the trailer steps when I saw that the person about to gut Peter was Eirik. "Stop that! I said no killing!"
Eirik paused in the act of beheading Peter. "No, you didn't. You said you didn't have anyone you wanted us to kill for you. There is a difference."
"No killing! No killing of anyone, anywhere! Is that clear?" I fell to my knees and hovered protectively over Peter, who watched with huge eyes as the sword tip waved back and forth over
his face. "And while you're at it, call your buddies off my friends!"
Eirik frowned, giving me a blue-eyed glare. "You are a strange goddess. You do not want us to kill anyone in your name, and you will not allow my men a little fun… what is next? You will
not allow us to have a spritfest and wench and gamble?"
"Spritfest?"
"Drinking party."
"Ah, OK. I don't care about drinking and… er… whatever else you do so long as it's not trying to kill anyone," I said, glaring back at him.
Eirik snarled something under his breath, but pulled back his sword. "As you command," he said in a grumpy voice.
I blinked a couple of times, not sure whether he was kidding me or not, but it turned out he
meant what he said.
"You're serious about this whole goddess thing, aren't you?" I asked, patting Peter on the shoulder to know he could sit up. He did so as I got to my feet. I helped him brush off the bits of dirt and dried grass.
Eirik shrugged. "You are a goddess. We are bound to you until you call the Valkyries to take us toValhalla ."
"In that case…" I stopped brushing Peter's back and jumped onto the nearest picnic table. I put two fingers in my mouth to do the ear-splitting whistle my dad was famous for."Vikings!" I
bellowed, and to my surprise, they stopped catapulting, fighting, climbing, and groping.
Mikaela kicked Finnvid in his happy zone. He doubled over and fell to the ground.
"Right, Eirik says you have to listen to me and do what I say. So, I'm saying knock it off! There will be no killing anyone! No hurling of fruit, peaches or otherwise. No climbing on any
furniture in an attempt to get to someone."
Finnvid writhed on the ground. Mikaela emptied her water bottle on him, and rushed over to
help Ramon up from the mass of peach pulp.
"No picking up women."
A huge Viking with long blond hair walked around the corner with Soren slung over his
shoulder.
"In fact, no picking up anyone!"
"Hail, Ljot," Eirik called to his buddy. "The goddess is giving us orders."
"Oh?" Ljot, the giant Viking, turned to face me, a happy smile on his face. Soren's legs kicked feebly. "Who do we kill?"
"Sheesh, what is it with you guys?" I asked, slapping my hands on my thighs in exasperation.
"Don't you know how to do anything other than fight and kill people? And put down Soren—he doesn't look like he's breathing."
The Vikings, every single one of them, looked thoughtful. Ljot the friendly giant plopped Soren into a lawn chair. "We wench well," one of them offered.
"Aye, that we do, Gils," Eirik agreed, and all the Vikings nodded (except Finnvid, who was struggling to get to his knees, his hands clasped over his groin). "And we can outdrink anyone, even a Finn."
The Vikings yelled their war cry. I squatted next to Soren and asked him if he was OK.
"Yes, I'm fine. Just a little windy," he said, rubbing his ribs.
"Winded, I think you mean. Windy means something else." I stood up again and looked at the Viking ghosts, my hands on my hips. "All right, so we need to have some ground rules—"
"I can geld stallions with just one
owner of the sword lunged toward him, sending Peter falling over a lawn chair. While the peach-
throwing Viking's attention was focused on Ramon, Tallulah ran to her trailer. But she stopped in the doorway and sent me a look that raised goose bumps on my arms. Although her lips didn't
move, I swear I could hear her voice on the wind saying, "This is your doing. Fix it!"
"Hey!" I bellowed, and threw myself off the trailer steps when I saw that the person about to gut Peter was Eirik. "Stop that! I said no killing!"
Eirik paused in the act of beheading Peter. "No, you didn't. You said you didn't have anyone you wanted us to kill for you. There is a difference."
"No killing! No killing of anyone, anywhere! Is that clear?" I fell to my knees and hovered protectively over Peter, who watched with huge eyes as the sword tip waved back and forth over
his face. "And while you're at it, call your buddies off my friends!"
Eirik frowned, giving me a blue-eyed glare. "You are a strange goddess. You do not want us to kill anyone in your name, and you will not allow my men a little fun… what is next? You will
not allow us to have a spritfest and wench and gamble?"
"Spritfest?"
"Drinking party."
"Ah, OK. I don't care about drinking and… er… whatever else you do so long as it's not trying to kill anyone," I said, glaring back at him.
Eirik snarled something under his breath, but pulled back his sword. "As you command," he said in a grumpy voice.
I blinked a couple of times, not sure whether he was kidding me or not, but it turned out he
meant what he said.
"You're serious about this whole goddess thing, aren't you?" I asked, patting Peter on the shoulder to know he could sit up. He did so as I got to my feet. I helped him brush off the bits of dirt and dried grass.
Eirik shrugged. "You are a goddess. We are bound to you until you call the Valkyries to take us toValhalla ."
"In that case…" I stopped brushing Peter's back and jumped onto the nearest picnic table. I put two fingers in my mouth to do the ear-splitting whistle my dad was famous for."Vikings!" I
bellowed, and to my surprise, they stopped catapulting, fighting, climbing, and groping.
Mikaela kicked Finnvid in his happy zone. He doubled over and fell to the ground.
"Right, Eirik says you have to listen to me and do what I say. So, I'm saying knock it off! There will be no killing anyone! No hurling of fruit, peaches or otherwise. No climbing on any
furniture in an attempt to get to someone."
Finnvid writhed on the ground. Mikaela emptied her water bottle on him, and rushed over to
help Ramon up from the mass of peach pulp.
"No picking up women."
A huge Viking with long blond hair walked around the corner with Soren slung over his
shoulder.
"In fact, no picking up anyone!"
"Hail, Ljot," Eirik called to his buddy. "The goddess is giving us orders."
"Oh?" Ljot, the giant Viking, turned to face me, a happy smile on his face. Soren's legs kicked feebly. "Who do we kill?"
"Sheesh, what is it with you guys?" I asked, slapping my hands on my thighs in exasperation.
"Don't you know how to do anything other than fight and kill people? And put down Soren—he doesn't look like he's breathing."
The Vikings, every single one of them, looked thoughtful. Ljot the friendly giant plopped Soren into a lawn chair. "We wench well," one of them offered.
"Aye, that we do, Gils," Eirik agreed, and all the Vikings nodded (except Finnvid, who was struggling to get to his knees, his hands clasped over his groin). "And we can outdrink anyone, even a Finn."
The Vikings yelled their war cry. I squatted next to Soren and asked him if he was OK.
"Yes, I'm fine. Just a little windy," he said, rubbing his ribs.
"Winded, I think you mean. Windy means something else." I stood up again and looked at the Viking ghosts, my hands on my hips. "All right, so we need to have some ground rules—"
"I can geld stallions with just one
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