yet.”
“Hunter, you don’t have to apologize to me for being upset. Honey, I just want to understand.”
“So do I, babe.” I grumble. “It’s just like no matter what I do, I’m always going to be the cocky bastard that everyone laughs at until I’m just an embarrassment.” The words tumble out and even I am shocked at the honesty. “I’ve spent so much time just living for the moment without giving a shit about the next one, Tiger Lily. Now, that’s not working. That’s not who I want to be anymore. You know I contribute nothing to this group other than walking my ass on stage to sing and play my bass. I don’t write a note or a lyric. Nothing. I just don’t know how to make everyone see me differently. There are songs I’ve written that no one has seen. I have more things to contribute to the band than just my voice and dick. There’s more to me than the drunken asshole that eats bacon by the pound. I don’t want my main task, before a show, to be assessing the tits in the front row. In twenty years, I’ll be a goddamn joke.” I huff. Trying to reign in my temper, I grip my hair, pulling at the damp strands. “I guess I’m realizing that when this ride is over, I won’t have shit to show for my life and that hurts like a bitch.”
“That’s not true at all.” She argues, her mouth pressing into a hard line. “They’re your family, Hunter. You don’t need to change everything about you. Just be honest, with all of us. Hunter, everyone knows that you’ve been working shit out in your head. They all knew something wasn’t right with you, but you don’t usually do deep and serious. We don’t know how to tread the waters, honey. Don’t carry the load alone, let us in. Fuck, let me in. I want to help carry it.”
Stopping just shy of the edge of the bed, I grab her hands in mine. Her eyes drag up my body slowly before meeting mine, taking in every inch of me. The way she stares into my eyes is almost too much. It’s as if she sees something so much more than what I see when I look into the mirror. Her lips part, before her tongue darts out to wet her bottom lip. I would give my left nut just to know what she is thinking right now. “You’re so fuckin’ beautiful it hurts.”
“I, uh.” She blushes, and if nothing else about her ever turned me on, this does.
“You are, Chase. No matter what I’ve made you feel before, it’s never been just fuckin’ to me. Even that first time I think I knew you were different.” Taking a deep breath, I groan. “I’ve never wanted anything or anyone as much as I want you right now, Tiger Lily.”
The words come out in a rush and Chase is just as shocked as I am. Her eyes widen as she takes in what I’ve just said. Slowly, her fingers slide from mine. Inching higher up my arms, she leans up onto her knees on the mattress. My eyes want to close, to savor this. To take in all the pleasure I get just from her touch, but I force them open. I need to watch, to know that for right now, she is really here.
“Whiskey makes you sweet, Hunter.” She teases, leaning down to run her lips along my bicep. Her tongue running along the tail of the dragon that is the focal point of my sleeve and I nearly come down my leg. “I love the dragon.” She whispers against my skin, her breath making me shudder.
The dragon means a lot of things. To me and Aiden; when he drew it out for me it was freeing. It signifies our past. The dark villain we had to fight against growing up. The dragon was our father. Now, ever since we had visited our mother and finally know the truth, it feels like I am fighting an entirely new battle. I had protected my brother above everything else. That was always my first priority. That man could never truly hurt me unless he hurt Aiden. And the bastard knew it. The dragon became a reminder of the man I was never going to become.
Once we left Georgia with Henry, I threw responsibility out the window and said fuck it all. I had been a
“Hunter, you don’t have to apologize to me for being upset. Honey, I just want to understand.”
“So do I, babe.” I grumble. “It’s just like no matter what I do, I’m always going to be the cocky bastard that everyone laughs at until I’m just an embarrassment.” The words tumble out and even I am shocked at the honesty. “I’ve spent so much time just living for the moment without giving a shit about the next one, Tiger Lily. Now, that’s not working. That’s not who I want to be anymore. You know I contribute nothing to this group other than walking my ass on stage to sing and play my bass. I don’t write a note or a lyric. Nothing. I just don’t know how to make everyone see me differently. There are songs I’ve written that no one has seen. I have more things to contribute to the band than just my voice and dick. There’s more to me than the drunken asshole that eats bacon by the pound. I don’t want my main task, before a show, to be assessing the tits in the front row. In twenty years, I’ll be a goddamn joke.” I huff. Trying to reign in my temper, I grip my hair, pulling at the damp strands. “I guess I’m realizing that when this ride is over, I won’t have shit to show for my life and that hurts like a bitch.”
“That’s not true at all.” She argues, her mouth pressing into a hard line. “They’re your family, Hunter. You don’t need to change everything about you. Just be honest, with all of us. Hunter, everyone knows that you’ve been working shit out in your head. They all knew something wasn’t right with you, but you don’t usually do deep and serious. We don’t know how to tread the waters, honey. Don’t carry the load alone, let us in. Fuck, let me in. I want to help carry it.”
Stopping just shy of the edge of the bed, I grab her hands in mine. Her eyes drag up my body slowly before meeting mine, taking in every inch of me. The way she stares into my eyes is almost too much. It’s as if she sees something so much more than what I see when I look into the mirror. Her lips part, before her tongue darts out to wet her bottom lip. I would give my left nut just to know what she is thinking right now. “You’re so fuckin’ beautiful it hurts.”
“I, uh.” She blushes, and if nothing else about her ever turned me on, this does.
“You are, Chase. No matter what I’ve made you feel before, it’s never been just fuckin’ to me. Even that first time I think I knew you were different.” Taking a deep breath, I groan. “I’ve never wanted anything or anyone as much as I want you right now, Tiger Lily.”
The words come out in a rush and Chase is just as shocked as I am. Her eyes widen as she takes in what I’ve just said. Slowly, her fingers slide from mine. Inching higher up my arms, she leans up onto her knees on the mattress. My eyes want to close, to savor this. To take in all the pleasure I get just from her touch, but I force them open. I need to watch, to know that for right now, she is really here.
“Whiskey makes you sweet, Hunter.” She teases, leaning down to run her lips along my bicep. Her tongue running along the tail of the dragon that is the focal point of my sleeve and I nearly come down my leg. “I love the dragon.” She whispers against my skin, her breath making me shudder.
The dragon means a lot of things. To me and Aiden; when he drew it out for me it was freeing. It signifies our past. The dark villain we had to fight against growing up. The dragon was our father. Now, ever since we had visited our mother and finally know the truth, it feels like I am fighting an entirely new battle. I had protected my brother above everything else. That was always my first priority. That man could never truly hurt me unless he hurt Aiden. And the bastard knew it. The dragon became a reminder of the man I was never going to become.
Once we left Georgia with Henry, I threw responsibility out the window and said fuck it all. I had been a
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