Read Online Calamity Jayne and the Sisterhood of the Traveling Lawn Gnome by Kathleen Bacus - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Kathleen Bacus
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be nice to put him in the flower bed out front for a change," Abigail said and shook her head. "I should've let him be."
"When did you move him?" I asked.
She shrugged. "Oh, late spring or around there. I had to have help moving him. He's quite a chunk."
"How big is, uh, er Cedric?" I asked.
Abigail put a hand out, palm down above her knee.
"He came to about here," she said. "I'd say he was somewhere around oh, thirty inches tall or so. Maybe half that across."
"You said you needed help moving him. He's fairly heavy then?" I asked.
"Oh, yes. I would imagine it would take two people to carry him any distance. But I expect one person could lift it and put it in a car and drive away."
Dang. Hellion Hannah wasn't off the hook yet.
"Could I borrow the photos?" I asked, getting to my feet.
"Of course. But what are you going to do with them?"
I shrugged, not about to tell Abigail that I was planning to lay down a short stack photo lineup of lawn gnome types for potential gnome witnesses.
"In my line of work I get out around the county a lot," I said. "I'll keep my eyes open for Cedric."
And pray I didn't turn to stone like Medusa's victims if I did find him.
I thanked Abigail for her hospitality, and Aunt Eunice led me to the back door. She'd made me park out of sight around the block and insisted we make our way to Abigail's back door separately. I wouldn't have been surprised if she'd required I use a password to gain admittance to the Winegardner domicile.
"It's the same gnome, isn't it?" Aunt Eunice said. "You saw a gnome by that Harvey the Horseman's mailbox, and it was Cedric wasn't it?"
"I'm not sure," I said, even though having laid peepers on Cedric one didn't tend to forget him.
"What are you going to do next?"
"I'm not sure."
"What kind of reporter are you?"
A reporter who had learned the hard way to look before she leaped headfirst into a story.
That kind.
"I'm going to do what I always do," I said.
Great Aunt Eunice blinked.
"You're gonna find a dead corpse?"
Was there any other kind?
"No, no," I put my hand up. "I'm going to ask questions. Nose around. See what I can find out. Do a little digging. You know. Investigate."
"You gonna keep us in the loop, right?"
I nodded.
"Oh sure. Of course. Absolutely."
"And mum's still the word regarding my little reunion surprise, right?"
"Oh, yes. Definitely. Mum is the mum." I made a little key locking gesture. "Believe me, I knownothing. Nothing at all . " I gave her a quick peck on a wrinkled cheek. "I'll be in touch," I said and started to open the door.
"No! Wait!" Aunt Eunice grabbed her Uncle Bo hat and pulled the hood of her sweatshirt up over her head and pulled the strings so tight she looked like an American Bulldog. She cracked the door open and looked to the left and then to the right. "All's clear!" she said. "Go!"
I felt a hand in the small of my back, and the next thing I knew she'd shoved me out of the house and closed the door behind me.
Head down, I hurried to my car thinking how fortunate it was Aunt Eunice only visited infrequently.
I jumped in my car, started it, and drove away, reaching the stop sign at the end of the block when my cell phone rang. I pulled it out and looked at the screen.
My gammy.
"H'lo?"
"Tressa? That you?"
I frowned.
"Yes. Weren't you calling me?"
"'Course I was callin' you. Who else would I be calling?"
I shook my head.
"I'm kind of busy right now, Gram. What do you need?"
"I need for you to drive around the block and pull into the driveway and come in."
"What?"
"I can hear the chug-chug-chugging of your car."
"I don't know what you mean, Gram. I'm not—"
"I can see you, Tressa!"
I sighed. How does she do that?
I bowed to the inevitable and, as instructed, made a right and a few seconds later pulled into the house Gram shared with her new hubby. I saw the curtains move at the front window. I turned my car off and got out, catching the movement of curtains again—this time at Abigail
"When did you move him?" I asked.
She shrugged. "Oh, late spring or around there. I had to have help moving him. He's quite a chunk."
"How big is, uh, er Cedric?" I asked.
Abigail put a hand out, palm down above her knee.
"He came to about here," she said. "I'd say he was somewhere around oh, thirty inches tall or so. Maybe half that across."
"You said you needed help moving him. He's fairly heavy then?" I asked.
"Oh, yes. I would imagine it would take two people to carry him any distance. But I expect one person could lift it and put it in a car and drive away."
Dang. Hellion Hannah wasn't off the hook yet.
"Could I borrow the photos?" I asked, getting to my feet.
"Of course. But what are you going to do with them?"
I shrugged, not about to tell Abigail that I was planning to lay down a short stack photo lineup of lawn gnome types for potential gnome witnesses.
"In my line of work I get out around the county a lot," I said. "I'll keep my eyes open for Cedric."
And pray I didn't turn to stone like Medusa's victims if I did find him.
I thanked Abigail for her hospitality, and Aunt Eunice led me to the back door. She'd made me park out of sight around the block and insisted we make our way to Abigail's back door separately. I wouldn't have been surprised if she'd required I use a password to gain admittance to the Winegardner domicile.
"It's the same gnome, isn't it?" Aunt Eunice said. "You saw a gnome by that Harvey the Horseman's mailbox, and it was Cedric wasn't it?"
"I'm not sure," I said, even though having laid peepers on Cedric one didn't tend to forget him.
"What are you going to do next?"
"I'm not sure."
"What kind of reporter are you?"
A reporter who had learned the hard way to look before she leaped headfirst into a story.
That kind.
"I'm going to do what I always do," I said.
Great Aunt Eunice blinked.
"You're gonna find a dead corpse?"
Was there any other kind?
"No, no," I put my hand up. "I'm going to ask questions. Nose around. See what I can find out. Do a little digging. You know. Investigate."
"You gonna keep us in the loop, right?"
I nodded.
"Oh sure. Of course. Absolutely."
"And mum's still the word regarding my little reunion surprise, right?"
"Oh, yes. Definitely. Mum is the mum." I made a little key locking gesture. "Believe me, I knownothing. Nothing at all . " I gave her a quick peck on a wrinkled cheek. "I'll be in touch," I said and started to open the door.
"No! Wait!" Aunt Eunice grabbed her Uncle Bo hat and pulled the hood of her sweatshirt up over her head and pulled the strings so tight she looked like an American Bulldog. She cracked the door open and looked to the left and then to the right. "All's clear!" she said. "Go!"
I felt a hand in the small of my back, and the next thing I knew she'd shoved me out of the house and closed the door behind me.
Head down, I hurried to my car thinking how fortunate it was Aunt Eunice only visited infrequently.
I jumped in my car, started it, and drove away, reaching the stop sign at the end of the block when my cell phone rang. I pulled it out and looked at the screen.
My gammy.
"H'lo?"
"Tressa? That you?"
I frowned.
"Yes. Weren't you calling me?"
"'Course I was callin' you. Who else would I be calling?"
I shook my head.
"I'm kind of busy right now, Gram. What do you need?"
"I need for you to drive around the block and pull into the driveway and come in."
"What?"
"I can hear the chug-chug-chugging of your car."
"I don't know what you mean, Gram. I'm not—"
"I can see you, Tressa!"
I sighed. How does she do that?
I bowed to the inevitable and, as instructed, made a right and a few seconds later pulled into the house Gram shared with her new hubby. I saw the curtains move at the front window. I turned my car off and got out, catching the movement of curtains again—this time at Abigail
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