Bushedwhacked Bride

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Authors: Eugenia Riley
Tags: Humor, Time travel, American West
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thank you for this fine lady you brung us. Just make sure she marries me—all right, Lord?”
    At this audacious pronouncement, pandemonium erupted at the table. Billy’s head shot up first. “Hey, no fair!” he protested to Wesley. “You can’t pray just for yourself like that.”
    “Yeah, that’s taking the Almighty’s name in vain,” put in Gabe.
    “Yeah, to be fair, you gotta pray that all of us gets to wed her,” concluded Luke with an impassioned nod.
    Then the boys flinched as Ma’s fist slammed down on the table, rattling the dishes. “Hush up, all of you, before I lose what little religion I got left! You boys is bickering worse than a passel of females fighting over a new bon net. How dare you interrupt Wesley a’prayin’? And Wes ley, that was dealing from the bottom of the deck if I ever heard it, trying to hoodwink the Almighty, no less. Any more of that, and you’re out of the contest.”
    “Yes, ma’am,” said a much sobered Wesley. Hastily, he finished. “Thank you, Lord. Amen.”
    “Amen,” intoned Ma.
    For a few moments the family passed the food and ate in silence. Jessica couldn’t believe how delicious and fresh everything tasted, or how hungry she found herself. She devoured two pieces of chicken, a large helping of mashed potatoes, and two gravy-soaked biscuits. Occasionally she caught Cole watching her with wry amusement. Then she observed Luke and Wes snickering to one another.
    She turned to Luke. “Am I doing something wrong?”
    He chuckled. “You know, sugar, you ain’t exactly being hanged in the morning.”
    Jessica was perplexed. “What do you mean?”
    Grinning, Wesley explained, “It’s just, we ain’t used to seeing no ladies that eat like lumberjacks.”
    Ma harrumphed. “How many ladies have you two buz zards seen, anyhow?”
    “We seen a few in Colorado City ,” asserted Luke. “And they always pick at their food like puny little kittens.”
    “Well, the ladies you two seen sure don’t have hogs to slop or wood to chop at home,” Ma scolded. “Rolling around in the hay with you heathens don’t wear ‘em out overly, I reckon.”
    Shame-faced, the men fell silent. Jessica lifted her nap kin to hide her amusement.
    A moment later, Gabe cleared his throat. “So, Miss Jessie, where are you from?”
    The question washed Jessica with a chill. Where was she from? Perhaps the truth—or a variation thereof— would suffice.
    “ I’m from Greeley ,” she answered.
    “ Greeley , eh?” asked Billy as he chomped on a drum stick. “You’re a fer piece from home, ain’t you, sugar? You got kin there?”
    Jessica felt awash in sadness as she thought of her fam ily—wherever they were—and realized she might never see them again. “Yes, a mother and father. An older brother.”
    The boys exchanged worried looks. “You look right melancholy, ma’am,” put in Luke. “Are you missing your kin?”
    Jessica felt a new shiver course down her spine. “Of course I am—and they’ll miss me as well.”
    “Will they send someone after you?” inquired Wesley.
    “Perhaps.” Sternly, Jessica added, “You know, you men really should release me.”
    Billy glanced nervously at Cole, and he spoke to Jessica with quiet authority. “But didn’t you say you came out here to teach school, Miss Jessie?”
    Jessica felt flustered. She had no idea why she was re ally here! She had only played along with what she’d heard the sheriff say back at the stagecoach. “Er—yes, I suppose I did say that.”
    “Then your people won’t be expecting to hear from you any time soon, now will they?” he went on with im peccable logic.
    “I suppose not,” she conceded.
    “Then why should we let you go?” he pursued.
    “Perhaps because it’s the decent thing to do?” she snapped.
    Ma reached out to pat Jessica’s hand. “Now, honey. Don’t go getting yourself all worked up again. We’ll be taking good care of you, you’ll see. Why, when things settle down and you

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