than that. Why had he lied? Because
it was easier than the truth. Saying how she had really left him was too real, too
horrific to repeat. Or to remember.
“But I didn"t read you wrong?” Dark Eyes asked.
Jay gave up on the snow and met the man"s gaze. “Nah.”
“Most guys who figure it out too late usually step out on their wives.”
“I loved her.”
Dark Eyes leaned against the brick wall perpendicular to Jay and watched
him.
“She knew I was…” Words escaped Jay. Or maybe that one word. He"d never
said it before. “She knew. But I never cheated. I just thought about stuff.”
“Stuff?”
“Stuff I wanted to do.”
“I see.” Dark Eyes swept a hand through the hair at the nape of Jay"s neck. He
raised an eyebrow. “Want some of that stuff to come true? Want me to kiss you
again?”
Breathe
41
“Yes. Please.” Begging? Jay"s control was slipping away. But kissing the man,
touching him, nothing had felt so right, not since—
Dark Eyes ran his hands lower, returning to the front of Jay"s jeans.
“I don"t know—” Jay licked his bottom lip and swallowed. “I don"t know what
I"m doing.”
The other man laughed. His eyes softened with the smile. Not an expression
he"d had yet. “You talk too much.” Then he bent his head until they were eye to eye,
a serious look on his face as he said, “Just "cause you wanted to kiss me doesn"t
mean you"re gay. Maybe you were just curious.”
“Not just curious.” Jay kissed him to prove his point. He didn"t think he"d be
able to move away if they stopped. He"d have to jerk off right there in the snow-
covered parking lot, standing next to the bar"s trash bins before attempting to get to
his Jeep.
The kisses turned vigorous. Passionate. Sensual. Dark Eyes tasted like
cigarettes and whiskey. So new. Heady and intense. Jay"s pulse quickened, and
Dark Eyes held him tighter. The man"s body was tense, his muscles on alert. What
was his deal? Wasn"t he enjoying himself? What would it take to smooth away the
tension?
“I"m gonna…” Dark Eyes tilted his head back, arched, and clutched Jay"s hips.
“Jesus. Been too long.”
Jay pushed Dark Eyes to the brick wall beside them. He clasped the front of
the man"s jeans and tore them open. No thought required, he shoved the briefs out
of the way and took another man"s dick in his hand for the first time.
Larger than his own. Longer. Wider. Hotter. A few more strokes and Dark
Eyes groaned. His hips jerked, and he clutched Jay"s upper arm. Cum shot up, some
landing on Jay"s hand, more on the snow at their feet, the smell of it strong, the feel
of it like his own but somehow so different.
Light and laughter spilled out the rear entrance of Sonny"s as the door opened.
Jay stepped back, and Dark Eyes faced the wall while he closed his pants. Two
couples staggered toward an SUV in the front row of the parking lot, laughing as
they went. One pair climbed into the back of the vehicle, and the driver faced Jay as
he held open the front door for a female passenger.
Dark Eyes reached into his leather jacket as he took two steps away. He
removed his smokes, lit one, and leaned against the wall.
Sure. He could be casual. He"d gotten off.
A gust of crisp air rounded the corner of the bar and smacked into Jay. The
sticky cum on his fingers cooled with the wind. His hand trembled as he wiped the
remnants of another man"s pleasure on his jeans.
What was he thinking? He wasn"t ready for this.
“Don"t go,” Dark Eyes said.
42
Sloan Parker
With those two words Jay froze. He wanted more—more kissing, more
touching, more everything. Just more.
After the SUV drove away, Jay slunk back to their previous location without
another thought about right or wrong, guilt or loss—wanting something, anything
to ease the ache. Dark Eyes leaned in. His warm breath hit Jay"s cheek.
“Tell me more stuff you want to do. One thing you"ve dreamed about.”
“A…a…blow—”
Dark Eyes
it was easier than the truth. Saying how she had really left him was too real, too
horrific to repeat. Or to remember.
“But I didn"t read you wrong?” Dark Eyes asked.
Jay gave up on the snow and met the man"s gaze. “Nah.”
“Most guys who figure it out too late usually step out on their wives.”
“I loved her.”
Dark Eyes leaned against the brick wall perpendicular to Jay and watched
him.
“She knew I was…” Words escaped Jay. Or maybe that one word. He"d never
said it before. “She knew. But I never cheated. I just thought about stuff.”
“Stuff?”
“Stuff I wanted to do.”
“I see.” Dark Eyes swept a hand through the hair at the nape of Jay"s neck. He
raised an eyebrow. “Want some of that stuff to come true? Want me to kiss you
again?”
Breathe
41
“Yes. Please.” Begging? Jay"s control was slipping away. But kissing the man,
touching him, nothing had felt so right, not since—
Dark Eyes ran his hands lower, returning to the front of Jay"s jeans.
“I don"t know—” Jay licked his bottom lip and swallowed. “I don"t know what
I"m doing.”
The other man laughed. His eyes softened with the smile. Not an expression
he"d had yet. “You talk too much.” Then he bent his head until they were eye to eye,
a serious look on his face as he said, “Just "cause you wanted to kiss me doesn"t
mean you"re gay. Maybe you were just curious.”
“Not just curious.” Jay kissed him to prove his point. He didn"t think he"d be
able to move away if they stopped. He"d have to jerk off right there in the snow-
covered parking lot, standing next to the bar"s trash bins before attempting to get to
his Jeep.
The kisses turned vigorous. Passionate. Sensual. Dark Eyes tasted like
cigarettes and whiskey. So new. Heady and intense. Jay"s pulse quickened, and
Dark Eyes held him tighter. The man"s body was tense, his muscles on alert. What
was his deal? Wasn"t he enjoying himself? What would it take to smooth away the
tension?
“I"m gonna…” Dark Eyes tilted his head back, arched, and clutched Jay"s hips.
“Jesus. Been too long.”
Jay pushed Dark Eyes to the brick wall beside them. He clasped the front of
the man"s jeans and tore them open. No thought required, he shoved the briefs out
of the way and took another man"s dick in his hand for the first time.
Larger than his own. Longer. Wider. Hotter. A few more strokes and Dark
Eyes groaned. His hips jerked, and he clutched Jay"s upper arm. Cum shot up, some
landing on Jay"s hand, more on the snow at their feet, the smell of it strong, the feel
of it like his own but somehow so different.
Light and laughter spilled out the rear entrance of Sonny"s as the door opened.
Jay stepped back, and Dark Eyes faced the wall while he closed his pants. Two
couples staggered toward an SUV in the front row of the parking lot, laughing as
they went. One pair climbed into the back of the vehicle, and the driver faced Jay as
he held open the front door for a female passenger.
Dark Eyes reached into his leather jacket as he took two steps away. He
removed his smokes, lit one, and leaned against the wall.
Sure. He could be casual. He"d gotten off.
A gust of crisp air rounded the corner of the bar and smacked into Jay. The
sticky cum on his fingers cooled with the wind. His hand trembled as he wiped the
remnants of another man"s pleasure on his jeans.
What was he thinking? He wasn"t ready for this.
“Don"t go,” Dark Eyes said.
42
Sloan Parker
With those two words Jay froze. He wanted more—more kissing, more
touching, more everything. Just more.
After the SUV drove away, Jay slunk back to their previous location without
another thought about right or wrong, guilt or loss—wanting something, anything
to ease the ache. Dark Eyes leaned in. His warm breath hit Jay"s cheek.
“Tell me more stuff you want to do. One thing you"ve dreamed about.”
“A…a…blow—”
Dark Eyes
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