mirth.
‘You can laugh,’ I say in a nasty tone. ‘She hasn’t even met you. She’s obviously just heard that Josh married someone who’s name begins with an L, who has a son whose name begins with an M. I’m Katy, for God’s sake. Katy, who’s a selfish cow. I can’t believe she’d do that to me.’
‘Are you sure about this?’ Dan says, looking more than a little worried about how this information has gone down. ‘Are you sure the characters are you?’
‘Look at us,’ says Josh with a shrug.
‘I’m happy,’ Si says brightly. ‘Steen’s gorgeous.’
‘Don’t you mind?’ says Dan suddenly. ‘Don’t you mind that someone whom you knew has written your life stories down and shown them to thousands of people?’
‘Millions, according to the ratings,’ adds Josh. Quietly.
‘Not quite our life stories.’ Lucy gets up to check the pudding. ‘Josh really isn’t Jacob, or Jacob Josh. Josh is far stronger than that. And Katy isn’t Cath. She’s gorgeous, for starters.’ She gives me a quick squeeze as she passes, which is supposed to make me feel better. And does, as it happens. ‘As for Steen’ – she eyes Si up and down – ‘Si’s far sweeter than Steen.’
‘Not to mention far more handsome,’ prompts Si.
‘Of course,’ she laughs. ‘And far more handsome.’
‘You know what it is,’ muses Josh, staring into his glass of wine as if it holds all the answers. ‘This is sort of her revenge, isn’t it? She’s taken the worst aspects of our characters and magnified them until that’s all the character is. But the weird thing is, she’s taken our characters as she knew them then, and I for one think I’ve changed immeasurably. We all have.’
‘Go on,’ I prompt, assured by Josh’s interpretation.
‘I was weak at university. I was insecure, had never been away from home, and so Portia’s decided that at thirty-something I would have to be a wimp. You were selfish at university, at times.’ He looks at me, and, although I don’t want to agree with him, I know it’s true.
‘But not when it came to Portia,’ he continues. ‘She was the weak spot for all of us, but you were often thoughtless, so she’s made you a self-obsessed adult.
‘And Steen.’ He looks at Si.
‘I know,’ says Si. ‘You don’t have to tell me I have a bitchy streak. I have calmed down, though, haven’t I?’ He looks at me, doubt written across his eyes. ‘ You think I’m a nicer person now, don’t you, Cath?’
I reach over and hug him. ‘Of course,’ I say, smiling. ‘I think you’re lovely.’
‘Good,’ he says. ‘It’s good of you to be so selfless for a change.’
I hit him, and he squeezes my leg and gives me a long, smoochy kiss on the cheek.
‘Revenge for what?’ asks Dan, intrigued, as a silence falls and we all start to look slightly shifty.
‘It’s a long story,’ Lucy says matter-of-factly, able to do so because she wasn’t involved, she simply heard about it many years later. Josh sat her down and told her, late one night, when they were having a conversation about first loves. Portia was his first love, he told her. She broke his heart and it took him a long time to recover, but it was all in the past now, and anyway, he hadn’t seen her for years.
‘A story for another time,’ Lucy says brightly. The disappointment shows on Dan’s face, but he’s polite enough not to push the point.
‘So what about Portia?’ Si asks finally, when he’s disengaged his lips from my face. ‘Is she the breathtaking Mercedes? Perfect on the outside but unable to find lurrve?’
‘Who knows,’ shrugs Dan. ‘She’s very beautiful, but I only met her the few times she came to my flat with interior designers and stuff.’
‘Interior designers,’ I smile. ‘ So Portia.’
‘I can give you my old number if you like,’ Dan says suddenly. ‘I don’t think she changed it, and it seems like you’d all like to get back in touch.’ He smiles. ‘If for
‘You can laugh,’ I say in a nasty tone. ‘She hasn’t even met you. She’s obviously just heard that Josh married someone who’s name begins with an L, who has a son whose name begins with an M. I’m Katy, for God’s sake. Katy, who’s a selfish cow. I can’t believe she’d do that to me.’
‘Are you sure about this?’ Dan says, looking more than a little worried about how this information has gone down. ‘Are you sure the characters are you?’
‘Look at us,’ says Josh with a shrug.
‘I’m happy,’ Si says brightly. ‘Steen’s gorgeous.’
‘Don’t you mind?’ says Dan suddenly. ‘Don’t you mind that someone whom you knew has written your life stories down and shown them to thousands of people?’
‘Millions, according to the ratings,’ adds Josh. Quietly.
‘Not quite our life stories.’ Lucy gets up to check the pudding. ‘Josh really isn’t Jacob, or Jacob Josh. Josh is far stronger than that. And Katy isn’t Cath. She’s gorgeous, for starters.’ She gives me a quick squeeze as she passes, which is supposed to make me feel better. And does, as it happens. ‘As for Steen’ – she eyes Si up and down – ‘Si’s far sweeter than Steen.’
‘Not to mention far more handsome,’ prompts Si.
‘Of course,’ she laughs. ‘And far more handsome.’
‘You know what it is,’ muses Josh, staring into his glass of wine as if it holds all the answers. ‘This is sort of her revenge, isn’t it? She’s taken the worst aspects of our characters and magnified them until that’s all the character is. But the weird thing is, she’s taken our characters as she knew them then, and I for one think I’ve changed immeasurably. We all have.’
‘Go on,’ I prompt, assured by Josh’s interpretation.
‘I was weak at university. I was insecure, had never been away from home, and so Portia’s decided that at thirty-something I would have to be a wimp. You were selfish at university, at times.’ He looks at me, and, although I don’t want to agree with him, I know it’s true.
‘But not when it came to Portia,’ he continues. ‘She was the weak spot for all of us, but you were often thoughtless, so she’s made you a self-obsessed adult.
‘And Steen.’ He looks at Si.
‘I know,’ says Si. ‘You don’t have to tell me I have a bitchy streak. I have calmed down, though, haven’t I?’ He looks at me, doubt written across his eyes. ‘ You think I’m a nicer person now, don’t you, Cath?’
I reach over and hug him. ‘Of course,’ I say, smiling. ‘I think you’re lovely.’
‘Good,’ he says. ‘It’s good of you to be so selfless for a change.’
I hit him, and he squeezes my leg and gives me a long, smoochy kiss on the cheek.
‘Revenge for what?’ asks Dan, intrigued, as a silence falls and we all start to look slightly shifty.
‘It’s a long story,’ Lucy says matter-of-factly, able to do so because she wasn’t involved, she simply heard about it many years later. Josh sat her down and told her, late one night, when they were having a conversation about first loves. Portia was his first love, he told her. She broke his heart and it took him a long time to recover, but it was all in the past now, and anyway, he hadn’t seen her for years.
‘A story for another time,’ Lucy says brightly. The disappointment shows on Dan’s face, but he’s polite enough not to push the point.
‘So what about Portia?’ Si asks finally, when he’s disengaged his lips from my face. ‘Is she the breathtaking Mercedes? Perfect on the outside but unable to find lurrve?’
‘Who knows,’ shrugs Dan. ‘She’s very beautiful, but I only met her the few times she came to my flat with interior designers and stuff.’
‘Interior designers,’ I smile. ‘ So Portia.’
‘I can give you my old number if you like,’ Dan says suddenly. ‘I don’t think she changed it, and it seems like you’d all like to get back in touch.’ He smiles. ‘If for
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