Bond On Bond

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on his wits than Q-Branch. Wits are good, but gadgets are fun, and thankfully more were in evidence when Sean returned for
Diamonds Are Forever
, which featured the pickpocket’s hated snap trap; a fake fingerprint to trick Tiffany Case into believing 007 is Peter Franks; and a voice changer that Blofeld uses to fool employees into thinking he is Willard Whyte and, subsequently, Q uses to fool Blofeld.
    One of Q’s new toys in
A View To A Kill
was a remote-controlled surveillance device called SNOOPER.
    The most profitable of all gadgets, however, was a little ring that prompted every fruit machine to pay out a jackpot. Desmond said he collected up hundreds of dollars’ worth of coins from the machines when the scene was completed, and decided rather than take them home he’d feed them back in to win an even bigger jackpot. Alas, the F/X guys had long gone home and the magic ring was of no use … he lost the lot!
TIME TO PLAY
    But more lovely toys were to come when yours truly stepped into the role in 1973. Apart from the Bug Sweeper, a Clothing Brush Communicator, a Shark gun that fired special highly pressurized air pellets and a genuine ‘Felix Lighter’ radio transmitter/receiver, there was a brilliant state-of-the-art Pulsar watch that illuminated to show the digital clock face.
    With Pierce Brosnan in
GoldenEye
came a new watch, the Omega Seamaster.
    There was also a lovely Rolex Submariner given to Bond by Moneypenny, after being repaired by Q. This was no ordinary watch. It featured a powerful electromagnet that was said to be able to deflect a bullet. More importantly, it could be used to unzip a lady’s dress. I was ever so disappointed when the F/X boys said it didn’t really work, and that Derek Meddings would instead have his hand up Maddy Smith’s skirt, pulling the zip down using a piece of wire. Lucky old Derek. Constant retakes did mean I got to spend the whole day with dear Maddy, perfecting my technique. Ah, if only I could find a working prototype of that watch today … I could give Maddy a call to see if she fancied re-enacting the scene. The Submariner also featured a spinning bezel that acted as a rotating saw, enabling Jim to cut his rope restraints and escape a pool full of man-eating sharks and then go on and rescue Solitaire.
    Did I ever get to keep any of the gadgets, is something I’m often asked. Alas no, they were whisked from set as soon as filming ended for the day. Shame, as I could earn a nice pension on eBay.
    In my second outing, it was the villainous Francisco Scaramanga who had the great gadgets. His legendary Golden Gun was assembled from a pen (the barrel) inserted into a cigarette case (the firing chamber), a cigarette lighter (the handle), and a cufflink (the trigger). This gun is limited to just one golden bullet, which are all handcrafted by speciality munitions manufacturer Lazar – they are all 4.2 mm (an unusual size) and made of twenty-three-carat gold. The bullets flatten upon impact.
    In
The Spy Who Loved Me
I of course had the wonderful Lotus Esprit and all its gadgets, but in addition was issued with a handy ski-pole-cum-gun, modified to fire .30-calibre rounds from a four-shot magazine in the handle. I saw Michael Billington off with that.
    Then there was a Seiko Quartz watch. It was the second film to feature the brand after a major tie-in for
The Man With The Golden Gun
, but this was the first film in which it had a purpose – a ticker-tape pager that allowed MI6 to send important messages to Jim. The Seiko was back in
Moonraker
, though this time with the added bonus of a high explosive charge and remote detonator incorporated. It accompanied the wrist dart gun, capable of firing both cyanide-coated and armour-piercing darts. Jim used that to save himself from an out-of-control centrifuge simulator and then kill Hugo Drax. It’s never a good idea to get into an out-of-control centrifuge simulator without one, let me tell you.
    Seiko were with us again on

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