Read Online Bob The Zombie by Jaime Johnesee - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Jaime Johnesee
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drink. Hey, it was AC/DC playing. One must dance 'Balls to the Wall' for Angus and his crew. Anyway, she was repulsed. Understandably so, decomposing fingers and strawberry daiquiris don't exactly go together. I must ask you though, who the hell orders a daiquiri at a night club? A restraunt/bar, sure, but a nightclub? Tacky! She turned out to be the owner's girlfriend. We were banned for life, or until he "switched broads." His words, not mine. I had a feeling our banning would be lifted soon, if the look she had shot him meant anything.
We went looking for a new place to hang, and I heard from a guy, who heard from a werewolf, that this place called Martin's was a cool bar to chill at. The horde and I shambled on over there and were surprised when a wave of calm rolled over us as we entered. I whistled in surprise, "Hey, how about that?"
"What?" Face asked, confused.
"Someone here is an expath. That calm you feel is coming from them. Must keep bar fights to a minimum. Smart move on the owner's part."
"Thank you." A tall man with green hair, eyebrows, lashes, goatee, and even a slight greenish hue to his skin grinned at me.
"I take it you're the owner."
" Griffin Martin. Nice to meet you."
"Bob."
"Pleasure. Feel free to check out the jukebox, and the menu." He gave me a wink and headed back behind the bar.
"He seems like a nice fella." Face said as he scanned a menu he'd lifted from one of the many booths lining the walls.
"Yeah. I think I'm going to...oh, my Goddess!"
"What? What's wrong, man?"
"Absolutely nothing, Face. Everything is right. Do you see what he has over by the jukebox?"
"The videogame?"
"Videogame? Nay, my friend, that's not just any game. That, my dearest zombie brother, is an original Donkey Kong in mint condition."
"Bob, you're drooling." Face handed me a napkin and I swiped the corner of my mouth. Sure enough, there was a string of drool cascading down my face. Hey, don't judge me, it was an original Donkey Kong and it was cherry! I mean, come on! What can I say, I wasn't exactly Mr. Popularity before I was impaled on a pair of gardening shears. Videogames, and the conventions associated with them, made up the bulk of my social life.
"She's a beaut, isn't she?" This from Griffin.
" She's out of this world amazing. Where did you get one in such great condition?"
"I have a friend who gets first dibs after all the gamer cons."
"Keep that friend! May I?" I felt a bit odd asking, I mean it was in a public area. Pretty obvious it was there to be played, but she was so mint I was nervous to set putrefied fingers on her without his ok.
"Go ahead." His smile widened to a grin and he chuckled as I approached the game.
After giving her a few loving strokes and whispering to her how pretty she was, I drew a couple quarters from my jeans pocket and instinctively smiled at the clink of each coin entering the machine. When the sinister music blared to life and the princess was captured and dragged up the ladder, I readied myself for battle against the barrel tossing simian. After some time, I realized I had gathered quite a crowd around me. People were hanging out and cheering when I would rescue the princess, just to have her carried away to the next level. They'd boo when the large pixilated ape would snatch her from my grasp and I found myself having more fun than I had in a long time. Until a skag of ghouls came in.
Skag is the term they use for themselves when they're in a group, we prefer horde as skag just sounds sleazy. Ghouls are people who have died and were also raised through magic, the difference s being zombies have free will while ghouls are chained to the witch who raised them. Zombies retain their full soul while ghouls only retain the memories of being human, their link to their necromancer is what keeps them from becoming a mindless machine of destruction. Most of the time, the one who brought them back allows them to run willy nilly, calling them occasionally, just to keep them
We went looking for a new place to hang, and I heard from a guy, who heard from a werewolf, that this place called Martin's was a cool bar to chill at. The horde and I shambled on over there and were surprised when a wave of calm rolled over us as we entered. I whistled in surprise, "Hey, how about that?"
"What?" Face asked, confused.
"Someone here is an expath. That calm you feel is coming from them. Must keep bar fights to a minimum. Smart move on the owner's part."
"Thank you." A tall man with green hair, eyebrows, lashes, goatee, and even a slight greenish hue to his skin grinned at me.
"I take it you're the owner."
" Griffin Martin. Nice to meet you."
"Bob."
"Pleasure. Feel free to check out the jukebox, and the menu." He gave me a wink and headed back behind the bar.
"He seems like a nice fella." Face said as he scanned a menu he'd lifted from one of the many booths lining the walls.
"Yeah. I think I'm going to...oh, my Goddess!"
"What? What's wrong, man?"
"Absolutely nothing, Face. Everything is right. Do you see what he has over by the jukebox?"
"The videogame?"
"Videogame? Nay, my friend, that's not just any game. That, my dearest zombie brother, is an original Donkey Kong in mint condition."
"Bob, you're drooling." Face handed me a napkin and I swiped the corner of my mouth. Sure enough, there was a string of drool cascading down my face. Hey, don't judge me, it was an original Donkey Kong and it was cherry! I mean, come on! What can I say, I wasn't exactly Mr. Popularity before I was impaled on a pair of gardening shears. Videogames, and the conventions associated with them, made up the bulk of my social life.
"She's a beaut, isn't she?" This from Griffin.
" She's out of this world amazing. Where did you get one in such great condition?"
"I have a friend who gets first dibs after all the gamer cons."
"Keep that friend! May I?" I felt a bit odd asking, I mean it was in a public area. Pretty obvious it was there to be played, but she was so mint I was nervous to set putrefied fingers on her without his ok.
"Go ahead." His smile widened to a grin and he chuckled as I approached the game.
After giving her a few loving strokes and whispering to her how pretty she was, I drew a couple quarters from my jeans pocket and instinctively smiled at the clink of each coin entering the machine. When the sinister music blared to life and the princess was captured and dragged up the ladder, I readied myself for battle against the barrel tossing simian. After some time, I realized I had gathered quite a crowd around me. People were hanging out and cheering when I would rescue the princess, just to have her carried away to the next level. They'd boo when the large pixilated ape would snatch her from my grasp and I found myself having more fun than I had in a long time. Until a skag of ghouls came in.
Skag is the term they use for themselves when they're in a group, we prefer horde as skag just sounds sleazy. Ghouls are people who have died and were also raised through magic, the difference s being zombies have free will while ghouls are chained to the witch who raised them. Zombies retain their full soul while ghouls only retain the memories of being human, their link to their necromancer is what keeps them from becoming a mindless machine of destruction. Most of the time, the one who brought them back allows them to run willy nilly, calling them occasionally, just to keep them
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