heart races in my chest. I am angry. I am angry at Mike. And I am scared. I’m scared for Mikey.
I’m given a form to sign. A nurse slips a cap over my head and asks me to slide my bare feet into a pair of slippers. She tells me I can stay with Mikey until he’s given the anaesthetic.
Mikey’s eyes are wide with fear. He doesn’t understand what’s happening. I try to explain that he’s going to go to sleep for a little while and that the doctors will make him feel better. When he wakes up his tummy won’t hurt anymore. Well not from a swelling appendix, anyway. But I’m sure the surgery will leave him with a different pain.
I watch Mikey’s eyes close and his hand loosens around mine. He’s wheeled away from me.
I’m taken to a waiting area. I sit and I wait.
I call Mike again. “It’s Lyndsay again. Mikey is in surgery, having his appendix removed. In case you care.” I hang up. I don’t ask him to call me. I don’t ask him to come to the hospital. He doesn’t care.
The nurse tells me the surgery will take between one to two hours. “Maybe you’d like to head down to the cafe for a hot drink?” she suggests.
I shake my head. Not because I’m not thirsty or wouldn’t like a hot drink, I could murder one, but because I need to be right here, where I can be found in case anything happens.
Please don’t let anything happen.
It’s five thirty in the morning. I’m struggling to keep my eyes open. I’m mentally and physically and emotionally exhausted. I stand up and pace the small waiting room. I’m walking toward the wall at the far end when I hear a loud voice.
“You!”
I turn around and Mike is pointing at me. He’s angry. At me.
“What made you think you have the right to consent for my son to have surgery?”
All my worry slips away and I burn with anger as I slowly walk toward Mike. “It became my right when you didn’t answer your phone because you were too busy sticking your dick in god only knows what!”
“I’m on tour,” he yells. “I’m working!”
“And so am I. It’s my job to care for your son. And I did that. And goodness knows I do a better damn job than you ever could.” My voice is equally raised as Mike’s.
I see Mike raise his hand but it doesn’t connect with me. Someone from behind grabs it and stops the impact. Mike and I stand staring each other down. In all my fuming rage, I hold his intense gaze. I will not be the first to look away. I will not back down.
“Let’s go Mike.” Wayne is holding Mike’s arm and moves his other arm to his shoulder, and pulls Mike away from me.
“She’s done. I want her gone,” Mike says as he walks form the room.
“We’ll talk about it when you’re calm...” Wayne’s voice fades as they walk away.
In all the heated emotion of my confrontation with Mike, I wasn’t aware that we had an audience. Gavin and Steve are standing on the other side of the room. Gavin steps forward and Steve leaves the room.
“Are you okay?” Gavin asks.
“Yes,” I say and sit down on the nearest chair. “But I just lost my job, didn’t I?” It surprises me how heavy that sits with me.
“I doubt it.” Gavin sits next to me and puts an arm around me. “Mike is stoned off his face. He’ll go home, sleep it off and he won’t remember any of it when he wakes up.”
I take a deep breath in. “It’s probably for the best that I go anyway. We hate each other.”
“Do you?” Gavin asks.
I shrug my shoulders. I don’t hate Mike. I don’t know him. But I hate what he does. I hate that he’s putting his partying lifestyle before his son’s welfare. I understand that he has to make a living, but does he have to get drunk and high every day?
Gavin continues. “Mike doesn’t hate you Lynd’s. He’s just mad. He’s hurting.”
“Why is Mr Has-The-World-At-His-Feet hurting?”
Gavin takes his arm away from me and rubs his face. “That man has had his heart broken over and over, by the same
I’m given a form to sign. A nurse slips a cap over my head and asks me to slide my bare feet into a pair of slippers. She tells me I can stay with Mikey until he’s given the anaesthetic.
Mikey’s eyes are wide with fear. He doesn’t understand what’s happening. I try to explain that he’s going to go to sleep for a little while and that the doctors will make him feel better. When he wakes up his tummy won’t hurt anymore. Well not from a swelling appendix, anyway. But I’m sure the surgery will leave him with a different pain.
I watch Mikey’s eyes close and his hand loosens around mine. He’s wheeled away from me.
I’m taken to a waiting area. I sit and I wait.
I call Mike again. “It’s Lyndsay again. Mikey is in surgery, having his appendix removed. In case you care.” I hang up. I don’t ask him to call me. I don’t ask him to come to the hospital. He doesn’t care.
The nurse tells me the surgery will take between one to two hours. “Maybe you’d like to head down to the cafe for a hot drink?” she suggests.
I shake my head. Not because I’m not thirsty or wouldn’t like a hot drink, I could murder one, but because I need to be right here, where I can be found in case anything happens.
Please don’t let anything happen.
It’s five thirty in the morning. I’m struggling to keep my eyes open. I’m mentally and physically and emotionally exhausted. I stand up and pace the small waiting room. I’m walking toward the wall at the far end when I hear a loud voice.
“You!”
I turn around and Mike is pointing at me. He’s angry. At me.
“What made you think you have the right to consent for my son to have surgery?”
All my worry slips away and I burn with anger as I slowly walk toward Mike. “It became my right when you didn’t answer your phone because you were too busy sticking your dick in god only knows what!”
“I’m on tour,” he yells. “I’m working!”
“And so am I. It’s my job to care for your son. And I did that. And goodness knows I do a better damn job than you ever could.” My voice is equally raised as Mike’s.
I see Mike raise his hand but it doesn’t connect with me. Someone from behind grabs it and stops the impact. Mike and I stand staring each other down. In all my fuming rage, I hold his intense gaze. I will not be the first to look away. I will not back down.
“Let’s go Mike.” Wayne is holding Mike’s arm and moves his other arm to his shoulder, and pulls Mike away from me.
“She’s done. I want her gone,” Mike says as he walks form the room.
“We’ll talk about it when you’re calm...” Wayne’s voice fades as they walk away.
In all the heated emotion of my confrontation with Mike, I wasn’t aware that we had an audience. Gavin and Steve are standing on the other side of the room. Gavin steps forward and Steve leaves the room.
“Are you okay?” Gavin asks.
“Yes,” I say and sit down on the nearest chair. “But I just lost my job, didn’t I?” It surprises me how heavy that sits with me.
“I doubt it.” Gavin sits next to me and puts an arm around me. “Mike is stoned off his face. He’ll go home, sleep it off and he won’t remember any of it when he wakes up.”
I take a deep breath in. “It’s probably for the best that I go anyway. We hate each other.”
“Do you?” Gavin asks.
I shrug my shoulders. I don’t hate Mike. I don’t know him. But I hate what he does. I hate that he’s putting his partying lifestyle before his son’s welfare. I understand that he has to make a living, but does he have to get drunk and high every day?
Gavin continues. “Mike doesn’t hate you Lynd’s. He’s just mad. He’s hurting.”
“Why is Mr Has-The-World-At-His-Feet hurting?”
Gavin takes his arm away from me and rubs his face. “That man has had his heart broken over and over, by the same
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