the neighboring forest across the road, adding to my fear and desperation.
Reaching the end of the eight-mile dirt road, I sat facing the busy highway, left turn signal on, watching the passing cars filled with people. They were probably returning home from work or going to eat with their family or to visit friends. Normal people living normal lives and I so badly wanted to join them.
To turn the clock back and appreciate the mundane, to take my mom up on the offer of going with her and Ellie. Why had I not listened to her? Why had I stayed at that old house, cut off from the outside world for all intents and purposes? If only I hadn’t been so stubborn.
The clock flashed 4:55 p.m. The eerie red numbers glowed more brightly as the light outside began to dwindle.
Driving wildly, I had made it to the end of the dirt road in a record ten minutes. I so badly wanted to punch the gas pedal and take off after Ellie, rejoin the land of the normal, but I couldn’t make myself do it. I couldn’t risk Ellie’s life on the chance he couldn’t find us.
Despite my previous impulsivity, I knew I had to go back. There was no true way out for me except to return where fate had placed me. He was the way out and when he had consumed me, then and only then would it be over.
4:57 p.m. Reaching up with my left hand, I turned the blinker off. My heart was reacting to it like a metronome. Very little time remained and so making a U-turn, I began the long drive back to my personal hell.
5:05 p.m. I pulled back into the garage, the door closing behind me with a heavy finality. I had driven back to the house with an even greater urgency than I had left it. Inside the house, I placed the gun and money on top of the refrigerator. Grabbing a juice bottle out of the refrigerator, I downed it quickly without stopping for air.
5:10 p.m. I sat down in the middle of the living room floor, the ceiling fan turning lazy circles over my head. I could smell the coagulated blood in the corner of the room, the ceiling fan blowing the foul scent around the room, making the bile rise in my throat. It wasn’t the blood per say that was making me sick. But it smelled like death, which I had smelled many times. Only this time the stench belonged to me.
If I survived tonight, I made up my mind to clean it up tomorrow. I couldn’t convince myself that he actually meant to keep me alive for a week. I wasn’t sure that I even wanted him to. It reminded me of being on death row. Was there any point to being given a few days to live?
5:12 p.m. I could see the digital clock from where I sat on the floor, its red light glittering in the dark reminding me of my date with the devil. As if I could forget. My mind kept asking the strangest questions. Should I meet him at the door? What should I wear? Would he want to talk and what would we talk about?
5:15 p.m. Gold and red rays from the setting sun caught my eye out the window. The sliver of sun that remained shimmered behind the mountains off in the west and I could see the moon beginning to take shape in the dusk.
One lone star just barely visible on the horizon to the left of the tallest mountain peak caught my attention and I watched it get brighter and brighter as the sun completely set into the horizon. The walls of the living room that had been awash in the gold and red hues of the sun were now dark and I realized I had forgotten to turn on any lights, but I couldn’t convince myself to move or to care.
5:28 p.m. I sat there in the dark still focusing on the one star I could see out the window. It helped me to keep my breathing steady. “Starlight, starbright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight,” I whispered into the dark. The childhood rhyme played over and over through my mind. I finished it with a silent plea for Ellie’s life every time.
5:42 p.m. Still nothing. I would go crazy, I was sure of it. The house was now completely dark with only the
Reaching the end of the eight-mile dirt road, I sat facing the busy highway, left turn signal on, watching the passing cars filled with people. They were probably returning home from work or going to eat with their family or to visit friends. Normal people living normal lives and I so badly wanted to join them.
To turn the clock back and appreciate the mundane, to take my mom up on the offer of going with her and Ellie. Why had I not listened to her? Why had I stayed at that old house, cut off from the outside world for all intents and purposes? If only I hadn’t been so stubborn.
The clock flashed 4:55 p.m. The eerie red numbers glowed more brightly as the light outside began to dwindle.
Driving wildly, I had made it to the end of the dirt road in a record ten minutes. I so badly wanted to punch the gas pedal and take off after Ellie, rejoin the land of the normal, but I couldn’t make myself do it. I couldn’t risk Ellie’s life on the chance he couldn’t find us.
Despite my previous impulsivity, I knew I had to go back. There was no true way out for me except to return where fate had placed me. He was the way out and when he had consumed me, then and only then would it be over.
4:57 p.m. Reaching up with my left hand, I turned the blinker off. My heart was reacting to it like a metronome. Very little time remained and so making a U-turn, I began the long drive back to my personal hell.
5:05 p.m. I pulled back into the garage, the door closing behind me with a heavy finality. I had driven back to the house with an even greater urgency than I had left it. Inside the house, I placed the gun and money on top of the refrigerator. Grabbing a juice bottle out of the refrigerator, I downed it quickly without stopping for air.
5:10 p.m. I sat down in the middle of the living room floor, the ceiling fan turning lazy circles over my head. I could smell the coagulated blood in the corner of the room, the ceiling fan blowing the foul scent around the room, making the bile rise in my throat. It wasn’t the blood per say that was making me sick. But it smelled like death, which I had smelled many times. Only this time the stench belonged to me.
If I survived tonight, I made up my mind to clean it up tomorrow. I couldn’t convince myself that he actually meant to keep me alive for a week. I wasn’t sure that I even wanted him to. It reminded me of being on death row. Was there any point to being given a few days to live?
5:12 p.m. I could see the digital clock from where I sat on the floor, its red light glittering in the dark reminding me of my date with the devil. As if I could forget. My mind kept asking the strangest questions. Should I meet him at the door? What should I wear? Would he want to talk and what would we talk about?
5:15 p.m. Gold and red rays from the setting sun caught my eye out the window. The sliver of sun that remained shimmered behind the mountains off in the west and I could see the moon beginning to take shape in the dusk.
One lone star just barely visible on the horizon to the left of the tallest mountain peak caught my attention and I watched it get brighter and brighter as the sun completely set into the horizon. The walls of the living room that had been awash in the gold and red hues of the sun were now dark and I realized I had forgotten to turn on any lights, but I couldn’t convince myself to move or to care.
5:28 p.m. I sat there in the dark still focusing on the one star I could see out the window. It helped me to keep my breathing steady. “Starlight, starbright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight,” I whispered into the dark. The childhood rhyme played over and over through my mind. I finished it with a silent plea for Ellie’s life every time.
5:42 p.m. Still nothing. I would go crazy, I was sure of it. The house was now completely dark with only the
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