over six weeks when normally he would come see me every week. It was tearing me up inside that he’d been gone so long but what mattered was he was here with me now.
“You don’t have to apologize, I’m just happy you’re here,” I said wrapping my arms around him. I quickly let go, knowing the guard would give me a hard time if I didn’t because I could’ve held on to Amir forever.
“Let’s sit down.” I willingly followed Amir’s lead wishing he would never leave. “So how are you holding up?”
“Look at me. Doesn’t this face say it all?”
“You’re still beautiful to me.”
“Whatever,” I laughed. “I appreciate you trying to make me feel better but a blatant lie isn’t going to help.”
“It’s not a lie. You’ll always be beautiful to me,” Amir said, with his voice trialing off.
“You make it sound as if you’re giving me some last departing words.” An eerie silence fell upon us. “That was supposed to be a joke. Maybe it didn’t come out right.”
“Aaliyah, I wanted to tell you face-to-face and not in some letter.”
“Tell me what?”
“I can’t come see you for awhile.”
“Why?” Amir turned away and then put his head down. “Answer me. Why can’t you come see me anymore?”
“It’s not forever, just for awhile.”
“You don’t get it. Each day I’m locked up in here, feels like forever. But when you come see me, you make forever seem possible. I can’t believe you’re turning your back on me.”
“I would never turn my back on you. But I can’t turn my back on Justina either.”
“Oh, so this is about Justina. She’s taken everything away from me and now she’s taking you away from me too.” I felt the tears welling up in my eyes. I was trying to fight the burning sensation but I couldn’t.
“Baby, please don’t cry.”
“Then make the tears stop. Don’t leave me, especially when I’m down. I don’t have anybody. I feel so alone.”
“You’re not alone. Your parent’s, your grandfather they’re all behind you.”
“My mom and dad are too busy fighting and you already know that Nico is in the middle of a war and my grandfather means well but trying to keep a family together that’s divided is damn near impossible to make time for jail visits but at least he tries,” I said softly as my voice trailed off.
“I promise you, I’ll never abandon you.”
“That’s what you’re doing right now.”
“Justina was shot and almost died. She feels like I’m taking your side. By coming to see you, she feels like it’s a slap in the face.”
“Do you think I killed Sway and shot Justina?”
“Of course not. You know I don’t believe that but Justina does and I have to give her my support, at least until the trial is over.”
“And then what? What if I’m convicted are you going to find me guilty too and dismiss me for good.”
“You won’t be found guilty.”
“You’re only saying that to make yourself feel better for walking away. But go ‘head. Poor Justina. I know how fragile she is. She needs you way more than I do. Now I know why you disappeared for the last few weeks. All the while I thought you were busy holding things down with your dad,” I said sarcastically.
“Aaliyah…”
“Just stop!” I barked, cutting Amir off before he could continue. “You’ve made your choice and I’ll have to accept it.”
“I love you both just in different ways. I want to support you but I have to help Justina too. You have to understand where I’m coming from.”
“I get it. I’ll be fine. One thing you’re right about is that my grandfather is always behind me. As long as I have his support I can get through anything. Goodbye, Amir. I wish you well.”
“Aaliyah, wait,” Amir called out as I stood up and left the room. There was no reason for me to turn around and listen to whatever else he had to say. In my world you’re either for me or against me, there’s no in between. When Amir made the decision to
“You don’t have to apologize, I’m just happy you’re here,” I said wrapping my arms around him. I quickly let go, knowing the guard would give me a hard time if I didn’t because I could’ve held on to Amir forever.
“Let’s sit down.” I willingly followed Amir’s lead wishing he would never leave. “So how are you holding up?”
“Look at me. Doesn’t this face say it all?”
“You’re still beautiful to me.”
“Whatever,” I laughed. “I appreciate you trying to make me feel better but a blatant lie isn’t going to help.”
“It’s not a lie. You’ll always be beautiful to me,” Amir said, with his voice trialing off.
“You make it sound as if you’re giving me some last departing words.” An eerie silence fell upon us. “That was supposed to be a joke. Maybe it didn’t come out right.”
“Aaliyah, I wanted to tell you face-to-face and not in some letter.”
“Tell me what?”
“I can’t come see you for awhile.”
“Why?” Amir turned away and then put his head down. “Answer me. Why can’t you come see me anymore?”
“It’s not forever, just for awhile.”
“You don’t get it. Each day I’m locked up in here, feels like forever. But when you come see me, you make forever seem possible. I can’t believe you’re turning your back on me.”
“I would never turn my back on you. But I can’t turn my back on Justina either.”
“Oh, so this is about Justina. She’s taken everything away from me and now she’s taking you away from me too.” I felt the tears welling up in my eyes. I was trying to fight the burning sensation but I couldn’t.
“Baby, please don’t cry.”
“Then make the tears stop. Don’t leave me, especially when I’m down. I don’t have anybody. I feel so alone.”
“You’re not alone. Your parent’s, your grandfather they’re all behind you.”
“My mom and dad are too busy fighting and you already know that Nico is in the middle of a war and my grandfather means well but trying to keep a family together that’s divided is damn near impossible to make time for jail visits but at least he tries,” I said softly as my voice trailed off.
“I promise you, I’ll never abandon you.”
“That’s what you’re doing right now.”
“Justina was shot and almost died. She feels like I’m taking your side. By coming to see you, she feels like it’s a slap in the face.”
“Do you think I killed Sway and shot Justina?”
“Of course not. You know I don’t believe that but Justina does and I have to give her my support, at least until the trial is over.”
“And then what? What if I’m convicted are you going to find me guilty too and dismiss me for good.”
“You won’t be found guilty.”
“You’re only saying that to make yourself feel better for walking away. But go ‘head. Poor Justina. I know how fragile she is. She needs you way more than I do. Now I know why you disappeared for the last few weeks. All the while I thought you were busy holding things down with your dad,” I said sarcastically.
“Aaliyah…”
“Just stop!” I barked, cutting Amir off before he could continue. “You’ve made your choice and I’ll have to accept it.”
“I love you both just in different ways. I want to support you but I have to help Justina too. You have to understand where I’m coming from.”
“I get it. I’ll be fine. One thing you’re right about is that my grandfather is always behind me. As long as I have his support I can get through anything. Goodbye, Amir. I wish you well.”
“Aaliyah, wait,” Amir called out as I stood up and left the room. There was no reason for me to turn around and listen to whatever else he had to say. In my world you’re either for me or against me, there’s no in between. When Amir made the decision to
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