Bad Girls
painful, tasks I must perform in addition to receiving the spanking, other parts of my body that can be subject to painful or humiliating treatments, and methods of prolonging a punishment so as to make it more memorable. The document emphasized the deterrence function of each of these supplements, but I couldn’t help believing that some of them had as a further benefit the erotic satisfaction of the author. The detailed and loving descriptions gave him away.
    By the time I finished the document I was both terrified and horny as hell. The two even seemed related. I needed Pete to fuck me, immediately. It seemed the only way to release the panicky anticipation that threatened to overflow inside me. Spanking had never before turned me on, and this was a different sort of arousal than any other I’d ever felt. I was wet, yet also scared. I didn’t want to be spanked, ever, but it was all I could think about. While Pete fucked me I imagined him spanking me and came easily and frequently. Afterwards I offered a silent prayer that my first spanking would not come for a long time, maybe all this was for show and real spankings were few and far between, but I was still dying of curiosity.
    Of course, it’s probably pretty obvious given my multitude of bad habits that I didn’t have to wait for long.
    â€˜Where did you get such an idea?’ I asked over breakfast the next morning.
    â€˜Before I went to law school I was a parole officer. Mostly it sucked. I couldn’t wait until I had enough money saved up to go to law school. But sometimes I would meet someone who was really great. I had this prostitute once who I became friends with. She was great. She taught me everything about her business and it’s helped me put a bunch of nasty pimps and violent johns behind bars. One thing she described stuck with me. She told me she got a lot of requests from men who wanted to spank her. Now she hated it, but she decided that turning away money wasn’t good business, so she just figured out how much she would have to charge to make it worth her while. She had to take into account how much it hurt, how much the marks would cut into future business, and how many she could take in a week. In the end she charged so much for them and got enough takers that she could give up sex altogether. Something she hated made her life easier and more lucrative. I admired the way she handled it, and it got me thinking.
    â€˜She taught me that everything had a price, but it wasn’t until I became a prosecutor that I made the connection between what she did and my world. Here’s what I realized: there are a lot of ways to pay a debt. Did you know that the German word for debt, Schuld , also means guilt? So, there are lots of ways to pay a guilt, too. Spankings just seem appropriate. I think they’re wasted on children, who don’t really have cognitive skills like judgment or symbolic equivalence to understand. It’s not just about action and consequence. It’s about recognizing an external authority and entering into an abstract economy of value, recognition and reinforcement. I learned from that prostitute that sometimes all this could be best communicated on a bared backside.’
    â€˜You’re weird,’ I said, though his story fascinated me more than he could have known.
    â€˜What about you, how did you end up like this?’
    â€˜Like what?’
    â€˜Like a law school dropout, debt ridden kleptomaniac.’
    â€˜You say it like it’s a bad thing.’
    â€˜It all depends what you’re comparing it to, I guess.’
    â€˜Well, I used to be a guilt ridden bulimic with bad taste in men.’
    â€˜I see you’re still working on your taste in men.’
    We laughed at his joke.
    â€˜I blame it on Jesus and the Pope,’ I said. ‘In Catholic school we worshipped men from afar, and when I finally met them in real life I treated them like gods. When they

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