Will
could not help shifting from foot to foot. An icy, anxious feeling
settled in Will’s stomach, along with a flutter. He should have
straightened his collar, smoothed down his hair, but it seemed one
morning of being a proper valet was all he could manage.
Not even that. Not even one morning. Will
would have lowered his eyes but something in his master’s gaze
would not allow him to.
“You came back,” his gentleman murmured, too
warmly considering Will’s mistakes. Will tried not to shiver.
“I am here as long as you need me, sir.” Will
could deny it no longer though it emerged on a sigh. “I am of
little help to you but I am here.”
“I could ask for no better help. You are
everything to me.” The words were low and heartfelt and created
another chill in Will’s stomach. Charlie straightened the moment he
spoke them, and tightened his mouth into a firm line. Will looked
away and then back to him. His eyes were stinging as they had that
morning. The chill would not leave him.
“Sir, you do not need to protect my
feelings.” Will could not stop trembling. “I cannot even prepare
your toast. I know nothing of politics. And I cannot stop thinking
of you, sir.” He swallowed a gasp to hear himself then gave a quiet
wail of despair. “I cannot control my tongue. Your sisters do not
care for me and rightfully so.”
“My sisters think the world of you.” Even
knowing him, knowing his gentle nature, his master’s scowl was
intimidating. His master pushed himself from his chair, sending it
rolling back from the desk. He put his hands out. “Where did you
hear otherwise?”
“Sir?” Will could not fully believe was he
was hearing. “Miss Ann said—”
“Ann credits you with my recovery, as do I.”
Charlie raised his voice. He stopped to clear his throat, then
directed his eyes at the wall. “You are not perfect but neither am
I. Your efforts are genuine and I could ask for no better help. To
know that you will be here every morning, even with just biscuits,
makes me want to get out of bed. That you admire my work so much
makes me work harder so I can be what you think I am. Will, I—”
Charlie ended his own words with a strangled cough and pushed one
hand flat against the surface of the desk. A few seconds later he
turned away. “I’m embarrassing myself. I apologise. If you wish to
leave your position, Will, I would not blame you.”
“Leave my position?” Will hurried forward,
the only motion he seemed capable of. He crossed the room in a
rush, stopping when his gentleman was in front of him. “You want me
to leave you?” he demanded a moment later when his master would not
look at him. “Do not send me away, sir, please. I can do better.”
Will did not believe it but he promised it just the same.
“Do better?” Charlie faced with him narrowed
eyes. His voice was first incredulous, then fierce. “How could you
possibly do better?” He could have been confused, but his air, his
very bearing, made it an order for the truth. Will moved without
thinking, hiding his stinging face against his gentleman’s
shoulder.
“A real valet would not do this,” Will told
him. It should not have to be said. But of the things that should
not be, his fingers crawling up to curl into his master’s cravat
were the bigger sin. Yet Will could not make himself release it. He
was a true disappointment in all respects.
His gentleman was scarcely breathing. “Will,”
Charlie whispered after too many moments, “Will, you must want more
than me, than this.”
Will lifted his head, aware he was not at his
best. His nose would be red, like his eyes. His hair was out of
order. There was nothing of allure or temptation in him. He did not
care. There were scant inches’ difference in their height, but he
stared up and remained as still as he could with his cheeks wet and
hiccoughs escaping his chest. After a moment he shook his head.
“No, sir.”
He nearly shut his eyes at the cool press of
a
could not help shifting from foot to foot. An icy, anxious feeling
settled in Will’s stomach, along with a flutter. He should have
straightened his collar, smoothed down his hair, but it seemed one
morning of being a proper valet was all he could manage.
Not even that. Not even one morning. Will
would have lowered his eyes but something in his master’s gaze
would not allow him to.
“You came back,” his gentleman murmured, too
warmly considering Will’s mistakes. Will tried not to shiver.
“I am here as long as you need me, sir.” Will
could deny it no longer though it emerged on a sigh. “I am of
little help to you but I am here.”
“I could ask for no better help. You are
everything to me.” The words were low and heartfelt and created
another chill in Will’s stomach. Charlie straightened the moment he
spoke them, and tightened his mouth into a firm line. Will looked
away and then back to him. His eyes were stinging as they had that
morning. The chill would not leave him.
“Sir, you do not need to protect my
feelings.” Will could not stop trembling. “I cannot even prepare
your toast. I know nothing of politics. And I cannot stop thinking
of you, sir.” He swallowed a gasp to hear himself then gave a quiet
wail of despair. “I cannot control my tongue. Your sisters do not
care for me and rightfully so.”
“My sisters think the world of you.” Even
knowing him, knowing his gentle nature, his master’s scowl was
intimidating. His master pushed himself from his chair, sending it
rolling back from the desk. He put his hands out. “Where did you
hear otherwise?”
“Sir?” Will could not fully believe was he
was hearing. “Miss Ann said—”
“Ann credits you with my recovery, as do I.”
Charlie raised his voice. He stopped to clear his throat, then
directed his eyes at the wall. “You are not perfect but neither am
I. Your efforts are genuine and I could ask for no better help. To
know that you will be here every morning, even with just biscuits,
makes me want to get out of bed. That you admire my work so much
makes me work harder so I can be what you think I am. Will, I—”
Charlie ended his own words with a strangled cough and pushed one
hand flat against the surface of the desk. A few seconds later he
turned away. “I’m embarrassing myself. I apologise. If you wish to
leave your position, Will, I would not blame you.”
“Leave my position?” Will hurried forward,
the only motion he seemed capable of. He crossed the room in a
rush, stopping when his gentleman was in front of him. “You want me
to leave you?” he demanded a moment later when his master would not
look at him. “Do not send me away, sir, please. I can do better.”
Will did not believe it but he promised it just the same.
“Do better?” Charlie faced with him narrowed
eyes. His voice was first incredulous, then fierce. “How could you
possibly do better?” He could have been confused, but his air, his
very bearing, made it an order for the truth. Will moved without
thinking, hiding his stinging face against his gentleman’s
shoulder.
“A real valet would not do this,” Will told
him. It should not have to be said. But of the things that should
not be, his fingers crawling up to curl into his master’s cravat
were the bigger sin. Yet Will could not make himself release it. He
was a true disappointment in all respects.
His gentleman was scarcely breathing. “Will,”
Charlie whispered after too many moments, “Will, you must want more
than me, than this.”
Will lifted his head, aware he was not at his
best. His nose would be red, like his eyes. His hair was out of
order. There was nothing of allure or temptation in him. He did not
care. There were scant inches’ difference in their height, but he
stared up and remained as still as he could with his cheeks wet and
hiccoughs escaping his chest. After a moment he shook his head.
“No, sir.”
He nearly shut his eyes at the cool press of
a
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