Amanda's Wedding

Read Online Amanda's Wedding by Jenny Colgan - Free Book Online Page B

Book: Amanda's Wedding by Jenny Colgan Read Free Book Online
Authors: Jenny Colgan
Ads: Link
and the wall managed to be both, with the help of the type of nasty border normally only seen in motorway hotels. There were frilly things everywhere – tie-backs, potpourri holders, ornamental pigs. It looked like the wet dream of a seven-year-old girl.
    â€˜Wow,’ said Fran, picking up the matching brush set from the glass top of the dressing table, under which rested a doily. ‘Miss Havisham’s cleaning rota’s certainly improved.’
    I couldn’t see the parcel I was looking for and headed towards the cupboard. Fran picked up one of the Laura Ashley pinafore numbers Linda favoured and flounced round the room singing, ‘I’m Linda, and I couldn’t be sorrier for breathing! Sorry, please pay some rent, how about five pence a month? I’m just going out now – oh, of course, I never do …’ I grimaced.
    Suddenly, the phone rang. We both jumped out of our skins, as if we’d been caught doing something very wrong. Which, of course, we had.
    â€˜You answer it!’ I hissed, absurdly, to Fran, and snatched the dress off her. Wrong-footed, she did as she was told.
    I went to hang the dress back up and, as I did, I noticed the box peeping out of the back of the cupboard. Feeling thoroughly low, I picked it up anyway.
    Inside there was layer upon layer of chocolate:everything from little Flyte bars to enormous, one-acre Galaxys, and those huge Toblerones you can only get in Duty Free. Some were just empty wrappers, strewn about in a most uncharacteristic manner.
    â€˜Chuffing hell!’ I exclaimed, as Fran walked back in.
    â€˜How did you know that was Nicholas from all the way in here?’
    â€˜Look at all this!’
    â€˜Oh my God. Eating disorder city. Jesus!’
    â€˜I know. She just gets fatter and fatter. She must eat in secret all the time.’
    â€˜What are you going to do?’
    â€˜What am I going to do? Oh, take full responsibility for it, obviously. I don’t know! We don’t even say good morning!’
    We looked at each other.
    On the overwrought bedside table, beside the crocheted tissue-box cover, there was only one picture, of Linda – a chubby child – standing next to a vicious-looking pony.
    Oh God, what was I going to do – mention it to her? D’oh! What did advice columns say? Leave some handy leaflets lying about. I didn’t know if they did ones that said, ‘We were snooping in your room and found something you’re obviously desperately trying to hide.’ Go down the pub? I tried to judge a tasteful length of time before suggesting this. Fran gave me a look that plainly told me it wasn’t long enough.
    â€˜Huh? Sorry, I was just thinking about Linda.’
    â€˜So what do you think we should …’
    â€˜I have absolutely no idea.’
    Pause.
    â€˜I suppose I could try and be nicer to her,’ I offered.
    â€˜Well, you do live together.’
    â€˜So do you, practically, and you’re not nice to anyone.’
    â€˜That’s because most people are boring. But Linda’s like, you know, sick .’
    â€˜OK, OK already.’
    I hoisted myself up and went and tackled some of Alex’s and my washing-up. Well, it was a start.
    â€˜So, ehm, that was Nicholas on the phone then?’
    And not, say, Alex (who was out buying furniture), having had a big change of heart and begging me to move with him to Fulham.
    â€˜Yes. You appear to be in demand.’
    Well, hooray!
    â€˜However, I told him you weren’t available, so he asked me out instead.’
    Boo! OK, I may have despised the guy, but I’d like to think he could tell me apart from other members of the same species.
    â€˜Huh. Did you say yes?’
    â€˜What do you think?’
    â€˜I think you said yes, you would smoochily love him forever and ever, and did he have any more of his hilarious accounting stories?’
    â€˜Oh, and also he said you may have to test for some

Similar Books

Twins Under His Tree

Karen Rose Smith

The Rothman Scandal

Stephen Birmingham

Kismet

AE Woodward

Try Me

Parker Blue

Follow the Sun

Deborah Smith

Stalking Ivory

Suzanne Arruda