this like adults.” Phil’s giving me an empty stare. He’s not even listening. “No one is in charge anymore. This is bigger than what you want.”
Something strange has happened. Phil is suddenly a trusted voice of authority.
Ted and I expressed our considerable doubts to each other, our fears that, while the apartments upstairs were nice and a general improvement, we still weren’t sure about making a permanent move. There were more pros than cons to moving, but like me, Ted wasn’t fond of the general malaise of evil that hung around the place. But Phil, the son of a bitch, went right ahead and gushed to Matt and Janette about Ms. Weathers’ apartment. It had a good view of the street, it had generators and silverware and peas!
Matt and Janette, accustomed to taking orders from Phil, jumped on board the train, leaving Ted and I to voice our doubts.
“But it was your idea to take a look around up there,” Matt protests, rolling his eyes at me for probably the fifth time that morning.
“I know that, but you have to understand.… It’s just, I feel like maybe we should talk about it some more, maybe take a vote.”
Conveniently, Phil hadn’t told them about the dead body with the slit throat. I think he may have mentioned something about moving Ms. Weathers out of her apartment, but that didn’t seem to bother Matt or Janette. It was tempting, so very tempting, to let them know that Phil had been ready to abandon us at a moment’s notice. When the scent of freedom was on the air, even briefly, Phil had taken a big whiff, rounded third and dove for home face-first.
I was hoping that they’d go for the vote idea. Holly would vote whichever way Ted did and then we could pronounce a stalemate and stall for a while.
“Fine,” Phil says, throwing up his hands. “A vote it is. All in favor of moving upstairs raise your hands.”
One, two, three and—what’s this?— four hands go up. Ted and I whip around to glare at Holly in unison and she takes a step back, shrugging her shoulders. “I just … I think it would be nice, don’t you? I’m sick of it down here.”
I elbow Ted, hard. “Control your fucking woman, dude.”
“Hey!” Holly shouts.
“It was a joke, Holly. Pipe down,” I say, pinching the bridge of my nose between thumb and forefinger. I can hear Phil laughing, chuckling at my frustration. Democracy is overrated. I should’ve just barred Phil in his office. Briefly, I consider telling them about the murdered man in Apartment D but decide against it. I haven’t seen Phil, Matt and Janette this happy since before this stupid shit storm began.
“It’s going to take a lot of work,” I remind them, tugging at my side of the power-struggle rope. This wasn’t going to be easy, but Phil still had a ways to go before the rest of the group looked to him for tasks. “We encountered some Groaners up there so we need to be vigilant. I think we should stick to two apartments, divided up however, but we shouldn’t spread out too far.”
Having won the argument, Phil is practically exuberant as he goes about hauling what’s left of our food upstairs. We organize teams, only one team taking a trip at a time, two people on the lookout while one person carries food or books or cleaning supplies. It takes three trips to get it all upstairs.
I wait to go on the last team, lingering in the safe room. We have to say good-bye to these monitors, these little beacons of information. Dapper is whining and hungry and I know he doesn’t want to leave the break room. I should be more confident, more optimistic, but it all feels too hasty. This is how mistakes are made, I keep thinking, this is how we end up cornered and fighting for our lives.
Hollianted and I will be taking one apartment, the other three are inhabiting the other. They’re right next to each other, so I take the initiative and take the ax to the drywall. It takes a few hours on and off of work, but eventually Ted and I have got a
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