Read Online All She Wanted (2) by Nicole Deese - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Nicole Deese
Tags: Romance, Contemporary
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connection which
seemed to transcend the confines of my soul.
I was known inside this room.
But something was off…
As my fingers slid off the keys, a
familiar ache filled my chest. Whatever great connection I had once felt—it seemed
a distant memory now.
I wanted to blame it on Alex—on the
heartache, on the rejection, on the deception.
Yet, I was just as much to blame as he
was. I had done the same thing to the only two people who had ever shown me
unconditional love.
I stared at the sheet music again—the piece
I just couldn’t seem to finish.
I sighed. Tomorrow I’ll start Tori’s processional.
It was almost 4 a.m.
I turned off the light and shuffled to
the couch, not having the energy to climb the stairs.
Chapter Seven
Briggs
This new eight-to-five workweek was very
odd.
Since becoming Charlie’s manny over two
weeks ago, this was the schedule we had worked out. Chief had made it clear to
me (several times) before he left, that she was the priority. There was no reason to make her pull night shifts, so I was
simply taken out of the normal rotation so that Charlie could get her office
tasks done during the day. It was quite an adjustment from my usual twenty-four
on, forty-eight off.
Honestly, I much preferred my old
schedule to this one.
It had been said that life as a fireman
could be compared with marriage—we ate, slept, worked, cleaned, played and
lived at the station together. When Chief Max hired me, I couldn’t fully grasp that
idea, until I experienced it for myself. Acting as one, working as one,
fighting as one for a common purpose had changed the way I saw the world.
We were a family.
Family .
Working for Chief had completely
redefined that word for me.
Angie and I had grown up in a family
that was nothing short of dysfunctional. It was no wonder why she had chosen
Dirk straight out of high school. She had been looking for the same sort of
escape I had been—only mine had come in the form of fighting, drinking, and
women.
Angie was fifteen months older than me,
but I would forever see her as my little sister—no matter what our birth order
said. I had always felt responsible to protect her, maybe because no one else had.
Our parents were a tangle of co-dependence and self-destruction. They never saw
past their own needs or wants. They never saw us.
Our home had not been one of violence,
but neglect left scars that violence couldn’t reach. There was no stability, no
consistency, no refuge inside it—we were merely a pit stop in their search for
greener grass.
They never did find it.
My mom was a master manipulator,
holding an invisible power over us all. She was the kind of crazy that stayed under
the radar, too well kept to be noticed, too unhinged to be healthy. My dad was a
passive man, letting his work have the best of his time and attention,
meanwhile letting his family drown in the chaos.
Their fights would last for hours, some
for days. Their verbal battle of insults was enough to drive even the most
lucid person toward the brink of insanity.
I was sixteen when they divorced.
Though I’d spent years craving
peace—the way one craved water in a desert—it was my endless hours of training that
had filled the deep void inside me. But that irony only served as a reminder to
my own dysfunction, which in turn caused me to push harder and train more.
Fighting quickly became my whole existence.
When I moved Angie to Dallas, I started
at the station soon after, working as a volunteer. I was desperate to find work
that could support my sister and soon-to-be nephew, outside of my winnings on
the weekends. Though I had saved every penny that I could, the day I was hired
into a permanent position was a huge sigh of relief. Kai had been the one to
convince Chief to hire me, ultimately securing my loyalty and respect.
Kai never sought praise or affirmation;
he was humble, kind, and good —likely
the best man I would ever know.
I loved him like a brother.
He had been
seemed to transcend the confines of my soul.
I was known inside this room.
But something was off…
As my fingers slid off the keys, a
familiar ache filled my chest. Whatever great connection I had once felt—it seemed
a distant memory now.
I wanted to blame it on Alex—on the
heartache, on the rejection, on the deception.
Yet, I was just as much to blame as he
was. I had done the same thing to the only two people who had ever shown me
unconditional love.
I stared at the sheet music again—the piece
I just couldn’t seem to finish.
I sighed. Tomorrow I’ll start Tori’s processional.
It was almost 4 a.m.
I turned off the light and shuffled to
the couch, not having the energy to climb the stairs.
Chapter Seven
Briggs
This new eight-to-five workweek was very
odd.
Since becoming Charlie’s manny over two
weeks ago, this was the schedule we had worked out. Chief had made it clear to
me (several times) before he left, that she was the priority. There was no reason to make her pull night shifts, so I was
simply taken out of the normal rotation so that Charlie could get her office
tasks done during the day. It was quite an adjustment from my usual twenty-four
on, forty-eight off.
Honestly, I much preferred my old
schedule to this one.
It had been said that life as a fireman
could be compared with marriage—we ate, slept, worked, cleaned, played and
lived at the station together. When Chief Max hired me, I couldn’t fully grasp that
idea, until I experienced it for myself. Acting as one, working as one,
fighting as one for a common purpose had changed the way I saw the world.
We were a family.
Family .
Working for Chief had completely
redefined that word for me.
Angie and I had grown up in a family
that was nothing short of dysfunctional. It was no wonder why she had chosen
Dirk straight out of high school. She had been looking for the same sort of
escape I had been—only mine had come in the form of fighting, drinking, and
women.
Angie was fifteen months older than me,
but I would forever see her as my little sister—no matter what our birth order
said. I had always felt responsible to protect her, maybe because no one else had.
Our parents were a tangle of co-dependence and self-destruction. They never saw
past their own needs or wants. They never saw us.
Our home had not been one of violence,
but neglect left scars that violence couldn’t reach. There was no stability, no
consistency, no refuge inside it—we were merely a pit stop in their search for
greener grass.
They never did find it.
My mom was a master manipulator,
holding an invisible power over us all. She was the kind of crazy that stayed under
the radar, too well kept to be noticed, too unhinged to be healthy. My dad was a
passive man, letting his work have the best of his time and attention,
meanwhile letting his family drown in the chaos.
Their fights would last for hours, some
for days. Their verbal battle of insults was enough to drive even the most
lucid person toward the brink of insanity.
I was sixteen when they divorced.
Though I’d spent years craving
peace—the way one craved water in a desert—it was my endless hours of training that
had filled the deep void inside me. But that irony only served as a reminder to
my own dysfunction, which in turn caused me to push harder and train more.
Fighting quickly became my whole existence.
When I moved Angie to Dallas, I started
at the station soon after, working as a volunteer. I was desperate to find work
that could support my sister and soon-to-be nephew, outside of my winnings on
the weekends. Though I had saved every penny that I could, the day I was hired
into a permanent position was a huge sigh of relief. Kai had been the one to
convince Chief to hire me, ultimately securing my loyalty and respect.
Kai never sought praise or affirmation;
he was humble, kind, and good —likely
the best man I would ever know.
I loved him like a brother.
He had been
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