for a variety of reasons, Jeff’s reactions to the idea of casual bird poop dropped in his home being number one.
Jamie was midway through both her dinner and the recounting of her exciting day spent with the letters of the alphabet, the colors of the rainbow, and the numbers one through ten when the boys and dogs returned, bringing Jeff along with them.
“Daddy!” Jamie was still in her highchair. Or rather, she’d been in it. But I blinked and she was out of it and in Jeff’s arms. Her plate and cup hadn’t moved. At least not that I’d seen. Meaning she’d used hyperspeed.
Heaved a sigh. Had to determine if this was a battle worth fighting while Jeff gave Jamie tons of Daddy Kisses and she started telling him about her day—at hyperspeed.
When A-Cs talked at their normal speeds, it made the humans in attendance woozy. While I was enhanced, my hearing had yet to catch up and I got nauseous fast. I could tell the boys, cats, and dogs weren’t enjoying it either.
“Slow down, Jamie-Kat,” Jeff said soothingly. “We need to talk slowly so we don’t make everyone else here feel sick.”
“Too late,” Len said quietly. He sat down at the breakfast bar. Kyle followed suit. “You know, has anyone considered you guys just talking at what you’d call normal speeds as a viable weapon?”
Jeff and I looked at each other. “No,” he said slowly. “But it’s an interesting idea.”
“Bad idea if publicized,” Kyle said. “It makes you scarier than you already are. I mean, I’m not scared of you guys, but that’s because I’m on your side and you know it.”
Jamie looked at all of us, a worried expression on her little face. “Sorry.”
I got up, took her from Jeff, and gave her a snuggle. “It’s okay. But that’s why we have to practice being more like Mommy than Daddy sometimes. Okay?”
She hugged me. “Okay, Mommy. I’ll talk to the kitties and puppies more.”
“Um, the kitties and puppies don’t like it when you talk fast, either, Jamie-Kat.”
Jamie shot a look toward me I was becoming familiar with—her “oh, Mommy, you see but you do not
observe
” look. “I meant like you do, Mommy. In their minds.”
CHAPTER 10
H AD TO SAY this for Len and Kyle—they knew, absolutely, when it was time to make a hasty retreat.
“We need to dress for dinner,” Len said as he stood quickly.
“Right,” Kyle agreed. “Call us when you need help getting the animals over to the Pontifex’s residence.”
With that, the two of them took off. They didn’t run, but they definitely didn’t stroll, either.
The front door closed and Jeff and I looked at each other. “You talk to the animals in their minds?” he asked finally.
“I guess.”
“I mean, not giving verbal commands you thought of, but by thinking at the animals without speaking and them understanding you?”
“Um, sorta.”
“Sorta?” Jeff sounded like he was working to keep his voice nice and calm. “And is Jamie saying that this talent has extended to the Earth animals, too?”
“Ah . . .”
“You know you do, Mommy,” Jamie said patiently, while I did my best to ensure that my expression, body language, and upper level thoughts didn’t betray how freaky it was to be having this conversation, with this level of language clarity, with my almost-one-year-old. “Just like you talk to Fairy Godfather ACE.”
“Right.” Now I had to hope my worry about ACE wasn’t getting through to Jamie. Prayed Jeff was doing some sort of mind block or something, though he looked like my Dr. Doolittle-ness had sent him to Freaked-Out Land with me.
Jamie shook her head. “Fairy Godfather ACE is tired and busy. You shouldn’t worry, Mommy. He’ll never leave us.”
“We can’t talk about this with other people, Jamie-Kat,” Jeff said quickly. “Daddy doesn’t want you to talk about ACE unless it’s only with Mommy or Daddy. And the same with Mommy being able to talk to the animals, that’s just for us to talk
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