until he doubled over and let out a scream of frustration.
That was when he broke down, fished out Becca’s number from the trash, and called her. It was better to admit he was weak than to end up like Ty.
But she didn’t answer, and the world dropped out from underneath him.
Now, an hour later, he was standing at the end of Pier 84, wondering if she would stand him up. He’d brought the bag with him. It mocked him from his back pocket while he waited. If she came, he’d ask her to dispose of it so he wouldn’t be tempted any longer.
And if she didn’t show…
He closed his eyes and wondered if taking a hit would ease his sense of abandonment. It would certainly cure his inability to play music. And maybe that would be the best course of action for now.
He spun around and collided with a woman, knocking her to the ground. It took him only a second to recognize her distinctive blue-green eyes. He knelt down to help her up. “Shit, Becca, I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” she said, even though she winced as she limped to the railing. “I’d called out your name, but I guess you didn’t hear me.”
“Are you hurt?”
She shook her head. “My fault for running full speed toward you in high heels, but I was just so worried about you.”
Something inside him did a one-eighty, and the insatiable craving that had plagued him for days retreated to the far corner of his mind.
She’d come.
She cared about him.
She was here to help him, and he wasn’t alone.
And knowing that took him to a level of humble gratitude he’d never known.
“Thanks,” he said softly.
“Of course.” She turned her attention to the river. “So, what happened?”
He pulled the bag out of his pocket and showed it to her.
Horror, panic, and disbelief wash over her features. “Ethan, why?”
The disappointment in her voice rubbed his pride the wrong way and raised his hackles. “I haven’t touched it.”
“But you have it.”
He tucked it back into his pocket. “Just wanted you to know why I called.”
“So I could watch you get high again?”
“How do you know I wasn’t inviting you to join me?” he snapped back, his words laced with sarcasm. “And before you say anything else, I didn’t buy it. I didn’t seek it out. It was given to me last night.”
Her eyes narrowed, but he couldn’t tell if her resentment was directed toward him or the person who’d given it to him. “By whom?”
“You wouldn’t know him.”
“Ace, right?”
His jaw fell slack. “How did you know?”
She gave a bitter laugh. “He always had the good stuff.” She held onto the railing and rocked back on her heels. “Is he still hanging out at the Tin Lily on Wednesdays?”
If he’d ever doubted her past as an addict, her knowledge of Ace’s hangouts confirmed it. “Yeah, he’s still there. I’m surprised the cops haven’t caught him, predictable as he is.”
“That’s because he has too many important people in his pocket.” She let go of the railing and ambled along the waterfront, Ethan following her. “That still doesn’t explain what you were doing there last night.”
“I went to listen to the music.”
“Sure, and men read Playboy for the articles.”
He darted in front of her, stopping her until she looked up at him. “No, really, I went for the music. And maybe to relive a few good memories.”
She pursed her lips like she was trying to assess him on her bullshit-o-meter. “Take off your sunglasses,” she ordered.
“Why?”
“Because I want to look into your eyes when you’re answering me.” When he complied, she asked, “Why did you go there last night?”
“To listen to the music,” he repeated.
She came closer until her face was inches from his. Her hawk-like eyes picked him apart, looking for some sign of a lie, but all he could think about was how bright the green rings around the pupils were today.
She backed down. “You’re going to have to start avoiding those kinds of
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