Read Online A Faint Cold Fear by Karin Slaughter - Free Book Online Page B

stared at it as if she could still read it, saying, 'It's almost identical to the one he wrote before.'
    'When was this?' Lena asked, her mind clicking onto the investigation.
    'January second. He slit his arm up the center. I found him before he lost too much blood, but…" She leaned her head on her hand, looking down at the note. She put her fingers on it, like she was touching a part of her son the only part that he had left her.
    "I'll need that back,' Lena told her, even though Jeffrey and Frank had destroyed its value as evidence.
    'Oh.' Rosen moved her hand away. 'Will I be able to get it back?'
    'Yes, when everything's finished.'
    'Oh,' Rosen repeated. She started to fidget with the chain holding her glasses. 'Can I see him?'
    'They'll need to perform an autopsy.'
    Rosen latched on to the news. 'Why? Did you find something suspicious?'
    'No,' Lena said, though she was still unsure. 'It's just routine because the death was unattended. No one was there.'
    'Was his body badly… damaged?'
    'Not really,' she said, knowing that the answer was subjective. Lena could still remember seeing her sister in the morgue last year. Though Sara had cleaned her up, the small bruises and cuts on Sibyl's face had seemed like a thousand wounds.
    'Where is he now?'
    'At the morgue. They'll release him to the funeral home in a day or so,' Lena told her, then realized from Rosen's shocked expression that the mother had not let her mind think through the steps to the point where she would actually have to bury her son. Lena thought about apologizing, but she knew what a pointless gesture the words would be.
    'He wanted to be cremated,' Rosen said. 'I don't think I can do that. I don't think I can let them…'
    She shook her head, not finishing. Her hand went to her mouth, and Lena noticed a wedding ring.
    'Do you want me to tell your husband?'
    'Brian's out of town,' she said. 'He's been working on a grant.'
    'He's at the college, too?'
    'Yes.' Her brow furrowed as she fought back emotions. 'Andy was working with him, trying to help.
    We thought he was doing better-' She tried to suppress a sob but finally broke down.
    Lena clutched the back of the chair, watching the other woman. Rosen was a silent crier, her lips parted but no sound coming out. She put her hand to her chest, squeezing her eyes closed as tears poured down her face. Her thin shoulders folded inward, and her chin trembled as it dropped to her chest.
    Lena was overwhelmed with the urge to leave. Even before the rape, she had never been good at comforting people. There was something about neediness that threatened her, like Lena would have to give up part of herself in order to console someone. She wanted to go home now to fortify herself, to wash the taste of fear out of her mouth. Lena had to find a way to regain her strength before she went out into the world again. Especially before she saw Jeffrey.
    Rosen must have sensed Lena's feelings. She wiped away a tear, her tone turning brisk. 'I need to call my husband,' she said. 'Can you give me a moment?'
    'Of course,' Lena told her, relieved. "I'll meet you in the library.' She put her hand on the doorknob but stopped, not looking at the doctor. 'I know I don't have a right to ask this,' she began, aware that Jeffrey would write her off completely if Rosen told him what had happened.
    Rosen seemed to sense exactly what Lena was worried about. She snapped, 'No, you don't have a right to ask.'
    Lena turned the knob, but she could feel Rosen's stare burrowing into her. Lena felt trapped, but she managed to ask, 'What?'
    Rosen offered what seemed like a compromise. She said, 'If you're sober, I won't tell him.'
    Lena swallowed, and her mouth could almost taste the shot of whiskey her mind had been conjuring for the last two minutes. Without answering, she shut the door behind her.
    Lena sat at an empty table by the circulation desk at the library, watching Chuck making a fool of himself with Nan Thomas, the school librarian.