Read Online Noggin by John Corey Whaley - Free Book Online

was shy about it and always made sure to tell everyone that they were saving up to buy a new place. Her stepdad, a mechanic, was a nice guy from Chicago who talked faster than an auctioneer. He was always covered in grease from his fingertips to his elbows, usually with a smudge or two on his face, and before Cate and I ever started dating, he would whisper things to me like “I’m rooting for you, buddy.” And I’d always pretend not to know what he was talking about and walk away embarrassed.
    I told Cate I loved her, that I was in love with her, outside of a movie theater in downtown Kansas City. She was supposed to say, with tears in her eyes, that she felt the same way. She was supposed to let me grab her and swoop her dramatically down to one side and kiss her like no one’s ever kissed anyone else in the world. Instead she said, “Thank you, that’s sweet,” and hugged me good night when her mom pulled up to take her home.
    The next day, after school, she showed up at my house holding a large, flat square, something wrapped in plain brown paper. She asked if we could go upstairs, and as I led her up, there was the sort of quiet between us thatmade every creak of our steps echo through the house. We got up to my room, and even though no one else was home, I shut the door behind me. She just stood there, holding the mystery gift, and she had this grin on her face that at least made me step away from the door and let go of the handle. I was ready to bolt, ready to run out of that room as soon as she broke my heart, so I wouldn’t have to face the mortification.
    “Relax,” she said.
    “What’s that?” I asked, my voice shaky just like the rest of me. Even my chest.
    “It’s a present for you.”
    “Why?”
    “Because I didn’t know what to say last night.”
    “I’m sorry.”
    “Don’t be sorry. Why would you be sorry for saying something like that?”
    “I don’t know.”
    “Open it,” she said, handing it over.
    It was a painting. But I’d known that much when she’d walked in. For starters, Cate was always painting. And also, right as she handed it to me, I saw a smudge of red on her hand. She was messy that way, never unkempt but always looking like she’d just been working on something important, something that just couldn’t wait.
    Something like this painting she handed me. It was us, right in the center of the canvas, sitting alone and side by side in a big empty movie theater. I had my arm aroundher, my feet kicked up on the seat in front of me. She even made the sneakers green and yellow. You could only see our backs. You could see her wavy blond hair hanging over the back of the seat and my short brown hair jutting just a little over the tops of my ears. There were empty black seats all around and behind us. Nearly the entire far background was a white screen with little tatters and cracks at the edges with huge red curtains on either side. It looked exactly like our theater.
    “This is amazing,” I said.
    “Like us.”
    “I love it,” I said.
    “I love you,” she said. “I do. I’m stupid and I don’t like surprises and you caught me off guard. But there it is.”
    “Don’t say it just because you feel obligated, Cate.”
    “I only feel obligated because it’s the truth, Travis.”
    Cate Conroy was a good girlfriend who used to draw dragons on my arms in black Sharpie ink and send me messages of photos that I’d have to translate into words. And she made me laugh like no one else could, this hard laugh that shook my whole body and brought tears to my eyes. The best thing about it, though, was that she could be so funny, so incredibly ridiculous and goofy sometimes, but never at anyone else’s expense. For that, and for a lot of other reasons, I was better when she was around me. That’s how I knew I loved her so much, because not loving her didn’t make any sense once I’d known what it felt like.
    Before Cate I was just Travis. I was a quiet kid whowould blush