Read Online Alcott, Louisa May - SSC 20 by A Double Life (v1.1) - Free Book Online

relatives and few friends, for death has
deprived her of the first, and her own choice of the last. The ladv you saw
with her plays propriety in her establishment; the lad is Mrs. Snow’s son, and
fills the role of cavaJiere- servente ; for Miss Eure is a Diana toward
men in general, and leads a quietly luxurious life among her books, pencils and
music, reading and studying all manner of things few women of two-and- twenty
care to know. But she has the wit to see that a woman’s mission is to be
charming, and when she has sufficient motive for the exertion she fulfils that
mission most successfully, as I know to my sorrow. Now let me off, and be for
ever grateful for the good turn I have done you to-night, both in urging you to
go to the theatre and helping vou to your wish when you got there.”
                 We
parted merrily, but his words lingered in my memory, and half unconsciously
exerted a new influence over me, for they flattered the three ruling passions
that make or mar the fortunes of us all — pride, ambition and self-love. I
wanted power, fame and ease, and all seemed waiting for me, not in the dim
future but the actual present, if my friend’s belief was to be relied upon; and
remembering all I had seen and heard that night, I felt that it was not utterly
without foundation. I pleased myself for an idle hour in dreaming dreams of
what might be; finding that amusement began to grow dangerously attractive, I
demolished my castles in the air with the last whiff of my meerschaum, and fell
asleep, echoing my own words:
     
                 “Art
is my wife, I will have no other!”
     
                 Punctual
to the moment I went to my appointment, and while waiting an answer to my ring
took an exterior survey of Miss Eure’s house. One of an imposing granite block,
it stood in a West End square, with every sign of unostentatious opulence about
it. I was very susceptible to all influences, either painful or pleasant, and
as I stood there the bland atmosphere that surrounded me seemed most
attractive; for my solitary life had been plain and poor, with little time for
ease, and few ornaments to give it grace. Now I seemed to have won the right to
enjoy both if 1 would; I no longer felt out of place there, and with this
feeling came the wish to try the sunny side of life, and see if its genial
gifts would prove more inspiring than the sterner masters I had been serving so
long.
                 The
door opened in the middle of my reverie, and I was led through an anteroom,
lined with warmhued pictures, to a large apartment, which had been converted
into an impromptu studio by some one who understood all the requisites for such
a place. The picture, my easel and other necessaries had preceded me, and I
thought to have spent a good hour in arranging matters. All was done, however,
with a skill that surprised me; the shaded windows, the carefully-arranged
brushes, the proper colors already on the palette, the easel and picture placed
as they should be, and a deep curtain hung behind a small dais, where I fancied
my model was to sit. The room was empty as I entered, and with the brief
message, “Miss Eure will be down directly,” the man noiselessly departed.
                 I
stood and looked about me with great satisfaction, thinking, “I cannot fail to
work well surrounded by such agreeable sights and sounds.” The house was very
still, for the turmoil of the city was subdued to a murmur, like the far-off
music of the sea; a soft gloom filled the room, divided by one strong ray that
fell athwart my picture, gifting it with warmth and light. Through a half-open
door I saw the green vista of a conservatory, full of fine blendings of color,
and wafts of many odors blown to me by the west wind rustling through orange
trees and slender palms; while the only sound that broke the silence was the
voice of a flame-colored foreign bird, singing a plaintive little strain like